Claire-in-Texas

The Honeymoon Period

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For me, the weight loss stopped, BUT, more important and more distressing, the exact way I was eating and losing now results in weight gain. I did not change what I ate, but about a year ago I realized I had to cut back in order not to gain. And I exercise like a fiend. So the emphasis on establishing good habits AND changing how I think about food is vital to maintaining a healthy weight.

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8 hours ago, Molly January said:

For me, the weight loss stopped, BUT, more important and more distressing, the exact way I was eating and losing now results in weight gain. I did not change what I ate, but about a year ago I realized I had to cut back in order not to gain. And I exercise like a fiend. So the emphasis on establishing good habits AND changing how I think about food is vital to maintaining a healthy weight.

You are not alone, Molly. The attached file is an article about how the intestine adapts and starts absorbing more (read the yellow sections). That explains why while you are eating the same and excercising the same, you now put on weight instead of losing. The battle is never over for us.

Gotta keep fighting the fat!

WJG-18-6357.pdf

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Thanks, blameitonthegenes! And thanks for highlighting the pertinent parts. When I first looked at the article I was on my tablet, and the highlighting didn't come through. I didn't have a shot at reading and understanding until I looked at it on the laptop.

About a year in, I increased calories to avoid losing more than I wanted to, but now have to be super vigilant.  That's why I shudder when I read some of the posts by those still in the honeymoon period. As we've said, this surgery is not magic, and I still have to work it. 

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2 hours ago, Molly January said:

Thanks, blameitonthegenes! And thanks for highlighting the pertinent parts. When I first looked at the article I was on my tablet, and the highlighting didn't come through. I didn't have a shot at reading and understanding until I looked at it on the laptop.

About a year in, I increased calories to avoid losing more than I wanted to, but now have to be super vigilant.  That's why I shudder when I read some of the posts by those still in the honeymoon period. As we've said, this surgery is not magic, and I still have to work it. 

Yes, we should tell the newbies not to worry about going under their goal weight. They should actually try to lose as much as possible so they have room for the regain that happens naturally.

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25 minutes ago, blameitonthegenes said:

Yes, we should tell the newbies not to worry about going under their goal weight. They should actually try to lose as much as possible so they have room for the regain that happens naturally.

Yes, that and also that we really do have to concentrate on habits and attitudes. The honeymoon gives us the luxury to do that, but it also can give us a false sense of confidence. 

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I'm terrified of weight gain! I'm two pounds over where I want to be so I can have a 5 pound cushion. The nut recently told me that everyone gains 5-10% of their weight back.....I'm terrified. 

Edited by Raeme
Missing word

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I don't think everyone gains weight after surgery.

For me, it has been all about food. My brain is always busy fending off cravings, head hunger, etc.  

I am an emotional eater. I eat whenever I experience unpleasant feelings .Food of any type is comforting (

 

I see a therapist regularly. He helps me cope with some of the feelings by helping me connect with the feelings I have avoided feeling for many years. I swallowed those feelings and then  covered them with cake, ice cream etc . Since surgery, I have had big stressors. My therapist helps me find non food based coping strategies.

 

i wish all of us the strength to keep moving forward 

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For me (6.5 months out) the challenge is knowing when to stop eating.  Thank goodness my stomach stops, but not before I have nausea, some pain, and rarely (but not unheard of) throwing up (I never threw up before so it's seriously not fun).  It's not clinical yet, but the right triggers need to be listened to early!  

 

 

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This was such a perfect time for me to find this topic. 

 

I am coming up on 6 months post op. I have already lost over 100 pounds, and I am wearing a size I haven't been able to comfortable wear since middle school. My recovery was a breeze and has definitely given me an inflated sense of confidence about losing weight. 

I so needed to hear about the honeymoon phase. About how I only have a couple more months of hard work and fast results before the rest of my life of even harder work with fewer results is going to set in. As one of the early posts stated... reading this has inspired me to strap myself back in. After all, I can't fall off the wagon if I honestly do everything I can to prevent it. 

I have also realized I need to reach out and find community. I just hate being talked down to, and I am so young that people in person seem to not being able to help themselves. The post-op emotions and increase in my depression has also hit me hard and I want nothing more than to just withdraw into myself. 

But I need to fight it. I did this to give myself a chance at a fuller, better, less-restrictive life and I'll be damned if I hit these bumps and decide to just give in. 

Thanks, all. 

Niki

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Niki, You have a good head on your shoulders. Stay focused on your task and block out the noise. What "they" have to say, not walking in your shoes, is absolutely irrelevant.

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7 hours ago, ardita said:

Niki, You have a good head on your shoulders. Stay focused on your task and block out the noise. What "they" have to say, not walking in your shoes, is absolutely irrelevant.

 

BINGO.

 

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14 hours ago, Nikineon said:

This was such a perfect time for me to find this topic. 

 

I am coming up on 6 months post op. I have already lost over 100 pounds, and I am wearing a size I haven't been able to comfortable wear since middle school. My recovery was a breeze and has definitely given me an inflated sense of confidence about losing weight. 

I so needed to hear about the honeymoon phase. About how I only have a couple more months of hard work and fast results before the rest of my life of even harder work with fewer results is going to set in. As one of the early posts stated... reading this has inspired me to strap myself back in. After all, I can't fall off the wagon if I honestly do everything I can to prevent it. 

I have also realized I need to reach out and find community. I just hate being talked down to, and I am so young that people in person seem to not being able to help themselves. The post-op emotions and increase in my depression has also hit me hard and I want nothing more than to just withdraw into myself. 

But I need to fight it. I did this to give myself a chance at a fuller, better, less-restrictive life and I'll be damned if I hit these bumps and decide to just give in. 

Thanks, all. 

Niki

Hi  Niki! Welcome to the group of honeymoon period awareness ha ha ha :)

You know you need to take full advantage of the next few months to get as close to your goal as possible, and you know you have to make changes for life and are willing to. This means you´ve won half the battle already.

With time it gets harder but not impossible and being in a community like this helps a lot. The sense of community support helps with depression too. If you have not been walking, start now and increment the time every week. Walking has been a life saver for me, both for weightloss and depression. 

Trust yourself and learn to block negative/annoying comments. You know best. Everything will be fine. 

Edited by blameitonthegenes
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On 12/2/2011 at 7:03 AM, Claire-in-Texas said:

I usually post messages that reflect a true "high" in my journey, whether it be a proud/WOW moment, or other aspects.

 

Not this time.

 

I've been reading a lot on the forum, and I'm really concerned. And this isn't about ME - it's about YOU.

 

I'm posting in Socialize in the hope that people at different phases in the journey will take this to heart and embrace it - I offer it with love and respect in my heart, and experience.

 

I have been reading a lot about eating "in moderation," outside the box of sensibility, from people in their honeymoon period. I read a lot about people feeling they are sacrificing the reward of eating a delicious and sugary something. A lot of angst, a lot of anger, a lot of stress. Of course, i read a lot about how wonderful people feel achieving their earned successes. I am totally thrilled by that.

 

If I may, I would like to address those of you who are in their first year post op, and the earlier the better.

 

This is what I have learned and realized now that I am in maintenance, and at my lowest weight.

 

I have learned that long-term success is due to a radical change of eating/lifestyle habits. Operative word: RADICAL. This is not news to you, but many, I fear, are pushing the envelope. One can't re-invent the wheel. Follow the guidelines and it works. Sounds simple - it IS simple - and that's the only way this journey works.

 

Honeymooners, strictly (and I mean STRICTLY) follow the eating guidelines. Moderation with other food is not a good path during this period - it's an excuse to prolong the wrong habits. If you follow the guidelines mentioned, then moderation becomes something completely different when you are years post op. Trust me, I'm there. I was a total carboholic, a food addict, an emotional eater, a lover of delicious large portions. No more. I have a base pattern of eating that works for me that has evolved during and since the honeymoon period - a DIFFERENT way of eating. I love pizza and birthday cake. One bite is enough. And I still LOVE to eat, and enjoy every morsel. But food is no longer the center of my universe.

 

You will not fall off the wagon if you strap yourself in.

 

It doesn't matter if you dump or not, which surgery you had, how fast or slow the weight is coming off. That is a small part of this huge journey. The MAIN issue here is a path to success, and that path is the GIFT of the tool AND the guidelines.

 

Honeymooners, I want for you what I have. I received very good advice when I was where you are, and I am making this humble attempt to pay it forward.

 

The best to you...

Wow.  Thank you Claire.  I am 13 days Post-Op and I am going to print this post and put it in my "important to remember and think about file" so I can refer to it often.  Thank you! Lori

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Just over 2 months to my surgiversary-Sept 1.  I have 6 pounds until I have a normal BMI.

Soon excited!

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Honeymooners, strictly (and I mean STRICTLY) follow the eating guidelines. Moderation with other food is not a good path during this period - it's an excuse to prolong the wrong habits. If you follow the guidelines mentioned, then moderation becomes something completely different when you are years post op.

The eating guidelines seem to differ vastly though. I was a bit surprised about the eating guidelines that were offered at the post-op lecture. 

The NUTs told us that we should eat the full fat version of cheeses and quark and to ditch the low fat products and diet products in general. As a snack we were told that e. g. these mini salamis would be ok to eat. I was like WTH??

Edited by summerset

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Hi summerset

To get where we are now we have all gone through hoops trying different diets and exercise programs. 

But dietary guidelines change all the time. After being told for decades that dairy fat is evil and egg yolks should be avoided to ward off high cholesterol, recommendations nowadays are a whole new ball game.

It turns out that dairy fat contains vitamin k2. K2 is the vector that will lead calcium into your bones. Without it calcium will lose its way and get deposited in your joints and most importantly in your arteries where it will cause atherosclerosis.

So years of eating fat free did more harm than good. Same thing with egg yolks. I still remember the times when we would only eat egg whites. In reality the yolk is a great nutrient. Eggs should be eaten whole.

As many members here will tell you fat is not the enemy. Carbs are....up to a point.

Of course there are different kinds of fat. Some are considered harmful. Others are absolutely necessary to flush the bad fats out of your system.

So don't be afraid of dairy fat. It doesn't deserve the bad rep that was imposed on us for years.

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On 25. Juni 2016 at 4:27 PM, summerset said:

 

2 hours ago, Sleevalicious said:

So years of eating fat free did more harm than good. Same thing with egg yolks. I still remember the times when we would only eat egg whites. In reality the yolk is a great nutrient. Eggs should be eaten whole.

As many members here will tell you fat is not the enemy. Carbs are....up to a point.

I think there was a misunderstanding. I wasn't "WTH??" about the full fat version of food. However, I was like "WTH??" about mini salamis, a very processed food.

As for carbs - they are the new fat as it seems. A few years ago fat was the bad guy, now it's carbs.

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39 minutes ago, summerset said:

I think there was a misunderstanding. I wasn't "WTH??" about the full fat version of food. However, I was like "WTH??" about mini salamis, a very processed food.

I kind of feel the same way about beef jerky, protein drinks, and nutrition bars, yet a day doesn't go by that I don't have at least one of these items (typically two, sometimes all three). 

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I am getting so excited to my surgiversary visit with my doctor.  2 months to the day!

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Hi- I am new here and just a few weeks post-op. I hope that what I am doing has me on the right track....I have been working super hard at changing my relationship with food. I grocery shop for the week and plan really nice meals that include lean proteins, plenty of veggies, and very few carbs. I eat my food in this order too; to make sure I am getting my protein and veggies in first. I usually only take about 8 bites and I am done. I already realised that for the first time in years I don't even think about what I am going to eat at my next meal (meaning I am not at work salivating over the meal to come later that evening) because I know I have something great every night. My meals early in the day are basic, small, mostly protein based. I just don't obsess about food anymore. I don't want junk food. Chocolate cravings are gone. Since I couldn't have caffeine at first, I decided to go ahead and stay away from coffee for good (except decaf). I will always love preparing good food and tasting it and sharing it with friends and family...but I am looking for quality over quantity, whole foods over processed, home cooked over pre- packaged, and to break free of craving things and running to satisfy my cravings. I hope that this mindset stays with me, I will fight to keep from falling back into the bad habits I had before. Any words of advice are appreciated!

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11 hours ago, K-Bella said:

Hi- I am new here and just a few weeks post-op. I hope that what I am doing has me on the right track....I have been working super hard at changing my relationship with food. I grocery shop for the week and plan really nice meals that include lean proteins, plenty of veggies, and very few carbs. I eat my food in this order too; to make sure I am getting my protein and veggies in first. I usually only take about 8 bites and I am done. I already realised that for the first time in years I don't even think about what I am going to eat at my next meal (meaning I am not at work salivating over the meal to come later that evening) because I know I have something great every night. My meals early in the day are basic, small, mostly protein based. I just don't obsess about food anymore. I don't want junk food. Chocolate cravings are gone. Since I couldn't have caffeine at first, I decided to go ahead and stay away from coffee for good (except decaf). I will always love preparing good food and tasting it and sharing it with friends and family...but I am looking for quality over quantity, whole foods over processed, home cooked over pre- packaged, and to break free of craving things and running to satisfy my cravings. I hope that this mindset stays with me, I will fight to keep from falling back into the bad habits I had before. Any words of advice are appreciated!

Welcome to the forum, K-Bella! It seems you are doing a great job :). Keep it up and you´ll be losing weight like it´s nothing. The best is yet to come! Enjoy and learn.

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On 6/8/2016 at 6:50 PM, Nikineon said:

I have also realized I need to reach out and find community. I just hate being talked down to, and I am so young that people in person seem to not being able to help themselves. The post-op emotions and increase in my depression has also hit me hard and I want nothing more than to just withdraw into myself. 

I like my online support group (TT) far better than any of the offline ones I've attending. In my offline support group there are some negative people who say things like "Just wait until you start gaining again." You can't really ignore them in a meeting like you can online. Not sure how active you are here but I've made friends here, learned a lot and found support when I've needed it. 

You are doing great and the end of the honeymoon isn't as tough for everyone. Stay on course. Remember why you did this and your changes are permanent. If you go off plan, have a bad day, whatever - try to figure out why it happened, smile and move on. Age doesn't have anything to do with your success. You are killing it! :)

 

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12 hours ago, K-Bella said:

Hi- I am new here and just a few weeks post-op. I hope that what I am doing has me on the right track....I have been working super hard at changing my relationship with food. I grocery shop for the week and plan really nice meals that include lean proteins, plenty of veggies, and very few carbs. I eat my food in this order too; to make sure I am getting my protein and veggies in first. I usually only take about 8 bites and I am done. I already realised that for the first time in years I don't even think about what I am going to eat at my next meal (meaning I am not at work salivating over the meal to come later that evening) because I know I have something great every night. My meals early in the day are basic, small, mostly protein based. I just don't obsess about food anymore. I don't want junk food. Chocolate cravings are gone. Since I couldn't have caffeine at first, I decided to go ahead and stay away from coffee for good (except decaf). I will always love preparing good food and tasting it and sharing it with friends and family...but I am looking for quality over quantity, whole foods over processed, home cooked over pre- packaged, and to break free of craving things and running to satisfy my cravings. I hope that this mindset stays with me, I will fight to keep from falling back into the bad habits I had before. Any words of advice are appreciated!

I don't think you need any advice. Keep doing what you are doing and you will be at goal before you know it! 

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