Lynette

How many of you told your employer?

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I told my boss and those co-workers closest to me, prior to surgery. There were two women in our department that had WLS prior to me. Co-workers were supportive.

A few thought I was "not fat enough for WLS". They had never seen me straining to wash my behind.

Seeing my results and the results of my other co-workers has gendered a lot of positive comments and inquiries. We are heallthier and look better. Who can argue with that :D .

Edited by woodsla

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Ive posted about this before but I've told most of my co-workers. They will suspect anyway and Id rather they know the truth then some wild rumor about bulimia or extreme dieting. In my defense, Ive only lived in this state for about a year and we only plan to be here another 2 years. Many of the people in my home state won't know until the first time they see me, including several family members. Its not their business nor their decision and I didn't want to hear the negative comments. In a couple of years when we move back any new co-workers will only know the much smaller me and no one's the wiser. I think I planned well!

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I also wasn't going to say anything but one gal in my dept had lap band and after I told my boss and put in for my short term disability we just ended up talking about it. A lot of people at work know but most everyone has been nice about it. Only one or two ppl said things like 'well, if you exercise now, why couldn't you do that before?' - things like that. Everyone has been really complementary and if they don't agree with it, I don't know about it. So it ended up working out well for me. However I do know one gal at work who told no one and people just think she is losing weight. I just figured with such a rapid weight loss I might as well just tell them. And as my ins pays for plastic surgery after bariatric surgery and I will probably do some of that, people were bound to find out. I have also discovered that people treat me differently now. More people talk to me and include me - both in my dept and throughout the whole office - I work in a large office. It was something I had not expected. While my experience has been positive, I think that one should carefully weigh out all the options before going public at work....

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I just recently made the decision to have WLS and unfortunately have to do a lot of doctors appointments in order for my insurance to authorize the surgery. Since some of my appointments occured during the day, I found that it was better to be up front (to my immediate co-workers and boss) then have the rumor mill running around. I informed them of my surgery and when it would likely be. Keeping secrets in the workplace can be a slippery slope.

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Well for me I told everyone who I work with that I am having the GB done and all but 2 were very supportive. even some of the associates that I only know when I pass by them and not really talk to were supportive. I think that being up fron and honest about it keeps the gossipers from going overboard. But then again they will always gossip, For me it also helps that I work in a place that has almost 300 to 400 employees so that it is not such a close nit group of people to spread rumors who care about things like this.

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I only told one of my close coworkers. He did not tell anybody, but of course they suspected it when I started losing lots of weight and not eating much. They would go to him and ask him did I get the gastric, but no one ever asked me. Maybe if they asked me I would have told them.

Shellymae

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I told a few people I trust, but Im not going to tell everyone because there are a lot of hateful people at my job and I just dont want to hear it. Maybe I will tell them I went to fat camp or something...

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I've been so excited since I first made the decision to have GBP that I've told everyone. I am now about 7 months post op and have lost a total of 90+ pounds. I have had nothing but support from everyone around me which is so awesome :) Since I've shared through the entire process, people feel free to ask questions which I like too.

Debi

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I told no one, I took 4 weeks medical and because of the confidentiality privacy laws my boss is not allowed to ask, however working with women I did say was off for some hernia / girlie stuff. This is private I need not anyone gossiping etc... I have dropped 30lbs and the office knows i go to weight watchers.

Only my immediate family knows and my best friend of 25 years

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I'm so undecided about telling or not telling, I'm just going to play it by ear, I work at a place that is like a lifetime movie about highschool cliques...lol and I am not over exaggerating, its every man for themselves if ur not in some sort of clique and they can be evil. I feel I have a great outgoing personality and seemed to have gotten by pretty well but have seen the damage that can be inflicted there. That being said, there are quite a few people at work "rumored" to have weight loss surgery, they've lost a significant amount of weight in a little bit of time, and none of admitted they hasd WLS, and I believe this is due to the people we all work with. I've never asked any of them, I've just given them compliments and minded my business, but I hear all the whispers, so I know what to expect

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I'm a bus driver, so I don't interact with my co-workers a whole lot. I told the office people (who gave me leave from work) about it, one of the office lady's husband had it done. I told a couple other people as well, but I didn't really make it well known. The wonderful thing about my job is that you can be gone from work for 3 weeks and some people won't even notice because you don't cross paths very often. Only one person noticed that she hadn't seen me in a while, and I told her I had surgery, but she didn't ask details, and I didn't volunteer them. So far nobody at work has noticed my weight loss, but it's still early. If they ask how I did it I'll tell them, but I probably won't advertise it. I'm afraid of responses like my grandfather's, in which he said the whole "So and so's sister's boyfriend's mother had that and died of an infection".

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I am in the process of debating this. I just started this position within my agency a few months ago. My supervisor likes to think everything is family, but these people don't know me very well and I feel private about it. Plus, I will be using up all my leave for this, and I know that is a worry point/red flag for some in management. But I know I need this. So I am debating, what to tell and when to tell it. Plus, I am having the surgery out of state, in the state/hospital/surgeon I started with before moving. I have a couple days off planned in Feb for fun and my supervisor knows that, so I am thinking of waiting till after I get back from that to put in the sick leave request for the surgery in March. I have 2 days in March before the surgery I have to take off for pre= appts.

I am thinking I will just say I need to have abdominal surgery and I decided to finish off tx with the doctor I started the process with.... My husband thinks they will know If I say anything other than "a surgical procedure" and I don't want to talk about it.

Also, I will need a note. My surgeon's office is "obesity surgery center" so I suppose that will tell all. Unless I ask my PCP to write the note taking me off work and releasing me back. She might do that. Don't know. guess I will put it on the list to ask about when I see her on Tuesday.

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I think I'm going to tell people I'm taking off time for "lady problems" and that it's not cancer. I don't want people to worry but I don't need the judgement either.

When I start losing I might tell a few people I trust, it just depends. People are so weird when you lose weight no matter how you do it.

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I'm not tellin' anyone about my surgery at work. I'm havin' the gastric sleeve in June. These are the type of people that talk about anything and anybody and I hear them gossip and say ugly things and I don't want them to form any opinions about me. When I did ask about an insurance term and what something meant, I was outright asked, "Are you having surgery?" I said, "Yes, hemorrhoidectomy." So then, the office manager "ear hustled" on the convo and asked me privately, "I thought I heard you say you had to have surgery? What's that about?" And I'm like, really? Mind you, I haven't asked these people ANYTHING personal. I've only worked there 4 months and everyone in there is old enough to be my mother. I answered her with, "It's minor, but when I need the time off, you'll get ample time of notice" and I left it at that. THEN, within the same week, I was saying to myself, "Wow, my back is really hurting." And because this is an office with women, one of them responded, "Well, what's goin' on with you" I laughed and said, "I have an appointment to see a plastic surgeon about my breasts." (they are rather large, but I still feel uneasy about sayin" what I'm really doing) Mainly because it's MY business. I won't tell them the truth and when they see me losing weight, I'll say I'm dieting because truthfully I am and will still be eating only small portions. I've even stopped going out to lunch with them (not because I don't care for them or dislike them, I just don't think watching them eat large quantities of stuff I know I can't have is beneficial to my cause). So I've stayed in the office while they've gone out. I've sensed some noses turned up at me for this... but ask me do I care. I'll wait.... Nope. Sure don't. So. LOL That's all I wanna say. I'm not telling. LOL

Edited by Tye76112

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I was unemployed when I had my surgery, but I did let my new employer know at my job interview. It's a gourmet cheese & wine shop and I felt the need to let them know that I would not be able to partake in the wine tastings and that I could only have a small bite of the products (they are huge on the employees knowing what they are selling so they can articulate the flavors to the patrons)...

They were really cool about it and even asked loads of questions.

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I am scheduled for RNY on 3/14. I have told many people I work with and they are very supportive of my decision. I wish everyone here had the same opportunity and didn't have to worry or hide one of the most positive and life-changing decisions they've made.

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I told only 3 people at my work. One of them is my direct supervisor and close friend and the other two are higher level management. I had to the tell the higher two guys because I am a government contractor and was taking a extended amount of time off for a holiday to incorporate the surgery. But other than these 3 people, no one else knows.

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I mixed feelings on what to do when I decide to have my WLS done. I told my boss and some of my co-workers, thinking that being honest with them would help to adjust for all of us. The honest is still in play all the time. We sometimes give lunchs togother as a group for moral reasons. I have done well with all of these lunch in my thoughts. When we did have lunchs together they were serving a lunch that was food that I could not eat at all. Now just here recently I have befriend a co-worker that has had the lap band done. And right after the lunchoen I wanted to go to her and say did eat anything at all. Her having a different proceduce done then I did did'nt change anything. i wanted to chuckle at myself as thought I was a happier and healthier person them they are. I worked for it, I did not see any reason why I could give myself a pat on the back for this accomplishment. Well, that is most of my story for the past 10 weeks after surgery so far. But there will be more to come. Looking forward it, I could end up chuckling again soon.

Your beliefs pave your way to success or block you.

- Marsha Sinetar

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I have told three or four of my closest friends, and they have been very supportive. My husband, children, and parents are supportive. I did tell my supervisor, and asked her not to tell anyone. She told her boss, though, which annoyed me. Now I wonder who else she told.

I am going to tell my co-workers a few weeks after my surgery. I don't want to do it now because I won't deal well with any horror stories, etc. I also don't want them watching everything I eat after the surgery, but I will deal with that and tell them when I feel I am ready.

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My boss has known forever and has been wonderful -- as has my boss' boss. HR was awesome to me too. My coworkers that do know about it have been totally supportive.

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I think the point is that it's a very personal decision, and what is right for one might be completely different for another. I decided not to share at work, with the exception of two close work friends, whom I completely trust. Everyone knew that I was having surgery, and I was out for 4 weeks. I never eluded to the type of surgery. If someone inquired, I always said the same thing......"I appreciate your concern, but it's personal. I hope you understand". I work with mostly men so there weren't many questions anyway.

My surgery was 2-1/2 months ago and I have lost enough for it to be very noticeable. Amazingly, no one at work has commented on my weight loss. I am starting to wonder if they think that I am sick or something, and don't want to say anything. LOL. I suppose now if anyone asked me directly if I had surgery, I would share. Like many others, I just didn't want to have to answer a bunch of questions or listen to a bunch of advice beforehand. Now, I feel that I'm far enough along that people wouldn't worry as much. No one should feel an obligation to share if they don't want to, but good for those of you who feel you can!

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I work for a HUGE international corporation... Im the only lady in my department of about 50 guys....Im not telling a soul... because of HIPAA laws I do not have to tell me boss why I am out or how long I am out....I send all of my FMLA forms to the medical department and my boss gets an email saying I am out til XX-XX-XX...and if there are any medical restrictions when I come back...end of story..

I occasionally take a week or so off for "mental health" purposes.... .this absence will be treated as such...

hopefully I will not be out for more than 2 weeks

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I recently told my boss that I had to be out for knee replacement, which some of my co-workers know but is not something I'd want to broadcast. Within a half an hour, three co-workers came to my desk to ask about it. NOT people I would've told or whose jobs would be directly impacted by my absence. When I mentioned it to my boss, she said "Oh, you didn't tell me not to tell anyone". Guess that what I get for assuming our conversation was confidential.

I will nto be sharing information about my WLS, just extending my leave.

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Are there any nannies who have had wls? Did you tell the family? If not how did you manage. I not worried about telling my current charges, but I have been with for 5 years. But I am starting a new job in a couple of weeks. I don't really know the family, and they had a young one, she will be less then a year old when I have my surgery.

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My answer to "you can do it without surgery" is that if I was going to be successful I would have done it by now. I'm 40 years old and it's time I did something drastic. My friend lost a lot of weight on her own, and even she agreed that this was necessary if I want to see my kids graduate.

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