Nana Trish

Local support group

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I haven’t been on the forum much lately. I’m sorry for this. I have been experiencing some, what I believe to be, post op depression, for the first time ever in my memory.. I’m not handling it well. But I’m trying to keep it under control as I have my next knee replacement surgery 2 weeks from tomorrow. 

I had my most recent physical therapy session yesterday afternoon. They said I’m doing well, which of course is a good thing. But this depression is causing me to feel like I’m not doing anything right, or doing enough. Well, because of the way I’ve been feeling, and since I don’t have my Harper back until the end of April, I decided to attend one of my bariatric surgeon’s support groups. I’m almost 2 years post op, and it was the first one I’ve been to. They are held the first Monday of the month, and I normally have Harper on Monday’s, and you really can’t get much out of a support group with a 2 year old in tow, lol. AND...the guest speaker for the evening just happened to be an orthopedic surgeon (one that belongs to the same practice as my knee guy!) so I figured what the heck!

So I went :) The surgeon had LOTS of great info about knee/hip replacements, and we were able to ask lots of questions. After the surgeon was done talking, my bariatric surgron’s RN hosted the “sharing” portion of the meeting. We went around the room, and had the chance to share (or pass) table by table. When they got to me, about 2/3 the way through the group, I was kind of nervous. REALLY nervous, actually. But, I though...this is why I’m here. I wanted to hear everyone else’s experiences, but I needed them to hear MINE, too. So I actually spoke up. I was so proud to say that I have lost 195 pounds (the highest amount lost in the whole group), that I’m almost 2 years post op, I’m a diabetic in complete remission, no more blood pressure or cholesterol meds, no more sleep apnea, you guys know my history. It was kind of surreal. It truly helped my depression (at least for a few hours yesterday), and I added a HUGE NSV to my list!! Pre op, I NEVER would have been able to speak to a group of about 35ish (?) people, with some confidence, and not break down. It was quite cathartic to be honest. Who knew?? I’m going to try and make it to the next meeting, which I think is April 1st, but I’ll have to see how new knee #2 is doing, since that will only be 11 days after surgery. 

I guess the whole point of this post is that reaching out, and even trying something new, can be extremely helpful when you are going through times of extreme stress. At ANY point post op. I’m still learning new things about myself every day...but even imagining speaking to a group of people about WLS, with some authority I might add, was something I couldn’t have pictured even 2 years ago. I’m so very glad I did it. And I hope I can keep reaching down deep inside of myself and continue trying new things. Because it’s pretty awesome! And people really do want to know what I’ve got to say! 

As usual, thank you so much for listening guys!! ❤️❤️❤️

Edited by Nana Trish

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That is great!! I have attended meetings every month. I don't get much out of some, but others are remarkable. I need this group and my monthly meeting to help me keep accountable to myself. Last meeting it was announced that starting in April meetings will be held twice monthly. I am so happy, two weeks is so much better to go without live communication then one month. I do pray your depression lightens and your healing progresses smoothly. 

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I'm so proud of you Trish. 

I know that going to that meeting can't have been easy for you but it sounds as if it did you a power of good.

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Yay!  To get up in front of a group can be terrifying!  You triumphed!  

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On 3/6/2019 at 6:04 AM, Anita62 said:

That is great!! I have attended meetings every month. I don't get much out of some, but others are remarkable. I need this group and my monthly meeting to help me keep accountable to myself. Last meeting it was announced that starting in April meetings will be held twice monthly. I am so happy, two weeks is so much better to go without live communication then one month. I do pray your depression lightens and your healing progresses smoothly. 

Thank you @Anita62 ❤️

I'm so glad you are able to attend your local meetings each month. I know this forum helps me IMMENSLY, but I had no idea that I would enjoy going to one in person this much, or even be able to speak! Thank that's totally awesome that your group will be meeting twice a month soon!! Keep going to them...especially if they are helping you this much!!

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On 3/5/2019 at 9:33 PM, Nana Trish said:

I guess the whole point of this post is that reaching out, and even trying something new, can be extremely helpful when you are going through times of extreme stress. At ANY point post op. I’m still learning new things about myself every day...but even imagining speaking to a group of people about WLS, with some authority I might add, was something I couldn’t have pictured even 2 years ago. I’m so very glad I did it. And I hope I can keep reaching down deep inside of myself and continue trying new things. Because it’s pretty awesome! And people really do want to know what I’ve got to say! 

WAY TO GO !!!!!!!!!!!!! That is SO awesome! And yes, you have incredible things to say. :) And I'm so glad going was helpful to you. Remember that feeling and go to the next meeting too! I wish I had meetings to go to. My surgeon's office only has them like every quarter, so that's why I go to Weight Watchers every week. Community, in person and online, is extremely helpful to we humans. I think it's in our nature. 

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On 3/6/2019 at 7:52 AM, cinwa said:

I'm so proud of you Trish. 

I know that going to that meeting can't have been easy for you but it sounds as if it did you a power of good.

❤️ @cinwa ❤️

It definitely was not easy for me to go, but it truly did me so much good that I'm planning on trying to attend the next one in April...before I have Harper back on Monday's again. It'll only be a couple of weeks after my next surgery, so I will have to wait and see how I'm feeling, but I'm planning on trying my hardest to go :) 

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Just now, Cindy Lou Who said:

WAY TO GO !!!!!!!!!!!!! That is SO awesome! And yes, you have incredible things to say. :) And I'm so glad going was helpful to you. Remember that feeling and go to the next meeting too! I wish I had meetings to go to. My surgeon's office only has them like every quarter, so that's why I go to Weight Watchers every week. Community, in person and online, is extremely helpful to we humans. I think it's in our nature. 

Thank you, Miss @Cindy Lou Who!! ❤️

I think weight watchers meetings sound like a fantastic way to get support while going through this, even if you're not following the WW program. It's a shame that our surgeons can't set up more meetings for us as post op WLS'ers. I know in my surgeon's case, he is flat out scheduled until the end of time...lol...so that means his staff is too. And you can literally only do so much, so I get it. But it's nice that there are still options out there for support!! And whether it's WW, or our surgeron's groups, or whatever, it's all weight loss centered, and we ALL know what each other is going through ❤️ 

I need to give you a HUGE CONGRATS, btw, on the incredible job you've done with your weight loss!! My hero!! I'm so proud of you, my friend! Keep up the awesome work ❤️❤️❤️

 

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On 3/6/2019 at 5:56 PM, Cheesehead said:

Yay!  To get up in front of a group can be terrifying!  You triumphed!  

Thank you, @Cheesehead!!! 

I didn't technically get up in front of the group, as we were fortunate to all be sitting at tables in a hotel conference room, lol. But the closer they got to my table, the tighter my throat felt, haha. Definitely still terrifying!! Gave me PTSD, thinking of all of the oral reports we had to give back in high school! But I did it, and I'm very proud of myself for doing it! And even more so for wanting to go back!!

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Does your hospital offer support groups? Mine has them once a month.

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6 hours ago, Nana Trish said:

Thank you, @Cheesehead!!! 

I didn't technically get up in front of the group, as we were fortunate to all be sitting at tables in a hotel conference room, lol. But the closer they got to my table, the tighter my throat felt, haha. Definitely still terrifying!! Gave me PTSD, thinking of all of the oral reports we had to give back in high school! But I did it, and I'm very proud of myself for doing it! And even more so for wanting to go back!!

While I have no problem conversing, I cannot talk to a group of people.  Scares the crap out of me.  

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9 hours ago, Boston Redhead said:

Does your hospital offer support groups? Mine has them once a month.

@Boston Redhead, no my hospital does not currently offer support groups, but my surgeon’s office does. Once a month, right now. Monday was the first one I’ve been able to attend, and I’m almost 2 years post op. And that’s only because I’m recovering from knee replacement surgery and don’t have to care for my grandson again until I’m healed from my second surgery...which is on March 20th. So I’m hoping to be able to attend the meeting in April too :) It sounds like your hospital does what my surgeon does. Do you attend any of your support group meetings?

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7 hours ago, Cheesehead said:

While I have no problem conversing, I cannot talk to a group of people.  Scares the crap out of me.  

I hear ya, @Cheesehead...still scares the crap out of me too! But I’m trying to force myself out of my comfort zone a little right now to see what I’m actually CAPABLE of. Not that I’d be able to speak at every meeting, but I still want to try and go to next month’s group. I enjoyed getting to meet and learn a little about the two other women that were sitting at our table, and that part was a lot easier than speaking to the group. One of the women I met was supposed to have knee replacement surgery 2 days ago, and said she is going to try and make it to the next meeting as well...I’d really like to find out how she made out :) 

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17 hours ago, Nana Trish said:

I need to give you a HUGE CONGRATS, btw, on the incredible job you've done with your weight loss!! My hero!! I'm so proud of you, my friend! Keep up the awesome work ❤️❤️❤️

Oh, @Nana Trish, I take that as a huge compliment coming from you, one of the true TT heroes, and mine for sure! Thank you. :wub:

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18 hours ago, Nana Trish said:

@Boston Redhead, no my hospital does not currently offer support groups, but my surgeon’s office does. Once a month, right now. Monday was the first one I’ve been able to attend, and I’m almost 2 years post op. And that’s only because I’m recovering from knee replacement surgery and don’t have to care for my grandson again until I’m healed from my second surgery...which is on March 20th. So I’m hoping to be able to attend the meeting in April too :) It sounds like your hospital does what my surgeon does. Do you attend any of your support group meetings?

The three area hospitals have them, and they’re open to all. I haven’t gone yet, but have been thinking about it. I’ve never really been a joiner, but I guess I should just bite the bullet and go....

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So happy that you were able to go to the meeting and be a part of it.  We have support group meetings, but I have never been either.  I suppose one of the reasons I never went is because of all the support I got here and I know the keto thing is not something my bariactric team likes.  They are more for a balanced diet which I mostly try and do now but during weight loss phase not so much, I was doing the keto like most people on TT but let myself get up to 50gm a day during weight loss phase and after goal stuck around 100gm.  Now that I don't track I don't know what it is but as long as I don't gain I am good.

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1 hour ago, tracyringo said:

So happy that you were able to go to the meeting and be a part of it.  We have support group meetings, but I have never been either.  I suppose one of the reasons I never went is because of all the support I got here and I know the keto thing is not something my bariactric team likes.  They are more for a balanced diet which I mostly try and do now but during weight loss phase not so much, I was doing the keto like most people on TT but let myself get up to 50gm a day during weight loss phase and after goal stuck around 100gm.  Now that I don't track I don't know what it is but as long as I don't gain I am good.

My doctor's office basically starts us off on keto during our pre op visit, so there isn't a problem for me with my surgeon as far as that goes. They do like us on a more balanced diet at some point, I think...but only if there is room for anything else after the protein is eaten. I ate between probably 15g-35ish grams of carbs during the pre op and active losing phase, but I had to kick myself out of ketosis after a while because I needed to stop losing. I probably eat average 70-90 grams of carbs per day now. Some days I know I go over 100g. I don't track my food much these days either. I do still weigh/measure MOST of the time, but not always. I've got a pretty good feel for what I can and can't have at this point, and especially since just after my knee surgery, my pouch still has restriction. And if I overeat, I still pay dearly for it! Lol. I think if we find what works for us after our WLS, and it's healthy, they should leave us to it. I've been maintaining for just over 11 months now, and I'm 21.2 pounds below my final goal weight, so I think I'm doing pretty well. I do eat veggies and fruit now, just small portions. If I eat them for a snack, I'll eat the full 4 ounces...like I'll eat a whole apple, or a whole avocado for a snack. If I eat veg with my dinner, it's not much...probably maybe an ounce or so. I like to keep a container of grape or cherry tomatoes in the house, and I grab a handful of those 3-4 times a day and just eat them plain. I love the flavor, and it truly keeps me from wanting to snack on something that's not good for me. 

I think the support we get here on the forum is more than enough...I think I was just kind of curious about my surgeon's meetings, and being in a room with a bunch of other WLS'ers at every stage was good too. Hubby has decided he needs to go for the sleeve at this point, because dieting and keeping it off isn't working for him any longer. So I think I kind of wanted to get him in there with me too...and he really got a lot out of it as well. 

:) 

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10 hours ago, Boston Redhead said:

The three area hospitals have them, and they’re open to all. I haven’t gone yet, but have been thinking about it. I’ve never really been a joiner, but I guess I should just bite the bullet and go....

You should try one, if you're curious...what's the worst that can happen? Lol :) You might even like it!

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2 hours ago, Nana Trish said:

You should try one, if you're curious...what's the worst that can happen? Lol :) You might even like it!

I would go to one here if we had them. I probably wouldn't have before I was at goal though because I do find there are a lot of bad influencers in the post WLS community...you know the ones....eat whatever you like, just in smaller portions believers.... the same crowd that then sit back and whine about slower weightloss and never managing to get to goal. Now those are the folk I'd like to slap the stupidity from.....and also the reason I'd probably never go to a support group.  :)

Wish Papa Trish the best in his endeavours to have sleeve surgery. I imagine it would be a pretty tough gig going down that path as well as baking all these cookies.

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Read this the other day but didn’ have time to respond.    I LOVE going to mine.    It’s only once a month but i haven’t missed a month since I started (a few months out). Everyone there “gets” it.  There are those who don’t take it seriously or do well (“I can’t give up pasta, I am Italian, I HAVE to have it at every meal”) But there are the successful people I can learn from and lots of tips etc that I gather.  They know me as a “superstar” there which is funny bc I once said “if you could see the REAL superstars on my board, you wouldn’t think I was so great!” Haha!  Anyway, I hope you can make it next month, it will be worth it, if even for your self esteem! :)

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