Aussie Bear

Is it just me that doesn't look skinny?

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2 hours ago, Jen581791 said:

I grabbed my new size 6 jeans out of the closet a couple of days ago, and my first thought was "Those are huge. I still have a ways to go. I can't believe I'm stalled right now" :unsure: No. That is my brain messing with me. Size 6 jeans are definitely not huge. Body dysmorphia - it's real. 

Yes! I look down at my (size 2) hips & thighs and think how huge they look. It really is insane how powerful body dysmorphia is. Also (on a sorta related note), Jen, you know that you look like a gorgeous model/actress now, right? I’ve always thought you were beautiful, but your latest pictures are jaw dropping and you are SO tiny now, you look like you’d fit right in at some Hollywood event.

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5 hours ago, athenarose said:

Yes! I look down at my (size 2) hips & thighs and think how huge they look. It really is insane how powerful body dysmorphia is. Also (on a sorta related note), Jen, you know that you look like a gorgeous model/actress now, right? I’ve always thought you were beautiful, but your latest pictures are jaw dropping and you are SO tiny now, you look like you’d fit right in at some Hollywood event.

We'll have to establish some sort of mutual admiration society, then :wub:  I'll take the odd days if you take the even days. Our self-esteem is going to skyrocket!! ;)

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I know this is an old thread, but I'm feeling super weird today, so I searched for "fat thighs." I'm currently wearing a child's size L top and size 6 skinny jeans that are loose. But I'm feeling fat! This is weird and scary!  It doesn't help that I was so stressed that I just ate 15 tortilla chips - for the first time in 2018, and for no reason! I don't know where this anxiety is coming from and I hate it! So afraid all my old habits will come back and I'll balloon up overnight. This is nuts.........:wacko:

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36 minutes ago, Cindy Lou Who said:

I know this is an old thread, but I'm feeling super weird today, so I searched for "fat thighs." I'm currently wearing a child's size L top and size 6 skinny jeans that are loose. But I'm feeling fat! This is weird and scary!  It doesn't help that I was so stressed that I just ate 15 tortilla chips - for the first time in 2018, and for no reason! I don't know where this anxiety is coming from and I hate it! So afraid all my old habits will come back and I'll balloon up overnight. This is nuts.........:wacko:

This really is an old thread... but guess what, I still feel like I did when I started it. I don't see the "skinny" person others tell me they see when I look at myself, I still see a fat person.  I still look at my clothes when I'm ironing them and think there's no way I'll fit in them even though some are actually too big. That said I can walk past my local larger sizes store where they use there smaller sized clothing for their mannequins and I think those clothes are huge....yet a couple of years ago I wouldn't have been able to squeeze into them.

Don't worry overly about the chips, but do toss them if possible. 15 chips isn't going to do any long term harm if you don't let them become a habit. When I eat stuff like that I make sure to weigh myself next day....I add water weight so easily that the inevitable 1.5-2kg gain I'll record the next day scares the bejesuz out of me and I pull myself back into gear.

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26 minutes ago, Cindy Lou Who said:

I know this is an old thread, but I'm feeling super weird today, so I searched for "fat thighs." I'm currently wearing a child's size L top and size 6 skinny jeans that are loose. But I'm feeling fat! This is weird and scary!  It doesn't help that I was so stressed that I just ate 15 tortilla chips - for the first time in 2018, and for no reason! I don't know where this anxiety is coming from and I hate it! So afraid all my old habits will come back and I'll balloon up overnight. This is nuts.........:wacko:

It may be an old thread, but I’m betting we’re all still struggling with the same issues. No wise answers from me, I’m afraid, but I sympathize.

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1 hour ago, Aussie Bear said:

This really is an old thread... but guess what, I still feel like I did when I started it. I don't see the "skinny" person others tell me they see when I look at myself, I still see a fat person.  I still look at my clothes when I'm ironing them and think there's no way I'll fit in them even though some are actually too big. That said I can walk past my local larger sizes store where they use there smaller sized clothing for their mannequins and I think those clothes are huge....yet a couple of years ago I wouldn't have been able to squeeze into them.

Don't worry overly about the chips, but do toss them if possible. 15 chips isn't going to do any long term harm if you don't let them become a habit. When I eat stuff like that I make sure to weigh myself next day....I add water weight so easily that the inevitable 1.5-2kg gain I'll record the next day scares the bejesuz out of me and I pull myself back into gear.

Thanks. Chips tossed. I'm still on the edge of the cliff looking over. Wondering why I'm out here. 

I think it's the holidays looming. Last year at this time I was eating ridiculous amounts of food, was considering surgery, and was totally miserable. Now people are coming over for Thanksgiving in 2 days, my house is a mess, I never think I cook well enough, and my husband is out of the country working.  

I need to see that everything is great, my family (including my DH) will all be here soon and I love them, I'm finally healthy and happy again, and everyone loves my cooking (and who cares if they didn't! :)) AND who cares if the house is messy!

Someone slap me! :lol:

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50 minutes ago, athenarose said:

It may be an old thread, but I’m betting we’re all still struggling with the same issues. No wise answers from me, I’m afraid, but I sympathize.

I sure hope time heals this too. It's a bugger!! Sometimes I feel cute, and sometimes I feel fat and crappy, and sometimes I don't know if I'm fat or skinny! Our brains need to hurry the hell up and catch up with our bodies!!!! :rolleyes:

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I have been called skinny Minnie a few times now by different people and I always think yeah right are they talking to me ?  Pictures are still the best way that I know to see where I am and where I have come from. I do look at others the same height and weight and think to myself their is no way I am the same size or smaller but I am .

 

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Holidays bring out the anxiety in a lot of people, including those who have never had body issues.  For us though, because it revolves around food and because we see people who may not have been kind to us over the years in our larger bodies,  and because we no longer have our "go-to" coping mechanism (stuffing food so that we don't scream) it becomes pretty intense.  I suffer along with the rest of you, however here is what I have found to help the most...

I try to keep my family engaged in non-food activities like going for a walk after the meal, putting up the outdoor nativity (actually a long-standing tradition at my mother's), making plans and drawing names for Christmas, playing football outside instead of watching it inside, etc.  Keeping everybody active and me away from food helps.  It usually isn't the meal that gets me but the constant nibbling so avoiding that with activities seems to help.  We also can avoid contentious political discussions that way as well :)

Breathe deep, enjoy the parts of the holiday that are great and know that those whispers about your thighs are lies that your anxiety is telling you.

 

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18 hours ago, msmarymac said:

Holidays bring out the anxiety in a lot of people, including those who have never had body issues.  For us though, because it revolves around food and because we see people who may not have been kind to us over the years in our larger bodies,  and because we no longer have our "go-to" coping mechanism (stuffing food so that we don't scream) it becomes pretty intense.  I suffer along with the rest of you, however here is what I have found to help the most...

I try to keep my family engaged in non-food activities like going for a walk after the meal, putting up the outdoor nativity (actually a long-standing tradition at my mother's), making plans and drawing names for Christmas, playing football outside instead of watching it inside, etc.  Keeping everybody active and me away from food helps.  It usually isn't the meal that gets me but the constant nibbling so avoiding that with activities seems to help.  We also can avoid contentious political discussions that way as well :)

Breathe deep, enjoy the parts of the holiday that are great and know that those whispers about your thighs are lies that your anxiety is telling you.

@msmarymac, this is a very thoughtful post. Thank you. It's so helpful to hear that lots of people probably suffer at this time too, it's just that we are trying to change our old "go-to" behaviors, which in itself is a bit stressful. But worth it! It's also helpful to think of those "whispers" as anxiety talking and not reality. (I think I'll start a holiday stress reliever thread. I don't know how to copy your post into another thread, or I would.)

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20 hours ago, tracyringo said:

I have been called skinny Minnie a few times now by different people and I always think yeah right are they talking to me ?  Pictures are still the best way that I know to see where I am and where I have come from. I do look at others the same height and weight and think to myself their is no way I am the same size or smaller but I am .

Thank you for this. Great idea to look at others at the same height and weight. I'm going to be on the lookout now!

I find it helpful to try on clothes. This morning I tried on my size 8 summer capris that are too big, then my fall size 6 jeans that are too big, and my size 4 corduroys that fit. I was shocked that I hadn't ballooned up to my old size 22 after Thanksgiving! :eek: 

Something tells me my brain catch up has a long way to go! :lol:

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It might be useful to look at pictures of real people at various sizes to see what they look like to your eyes. Here's a link to a website that does that. When I search for someone my age/height/weight, it absolutely blows me away to see what other women look like! They are so thin!! (and I guess I am, too). 

https://www.mybodygallery.com/

 

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13 minutes ago, Jen581791 said:

It might be useful to look at pictures of real people at various sizes to see what they look like to your eyes. Here's a link to a website that does that. When I search for someone my age/height/weight, it absolutely blows me away to see what other women look like! They are so thin!! (and I guess I am, too). 

https://www.mybodygallery.com/

Woah, cool! Thanks so much! SUPER helpful! What a reality check! 

And may I say you ARE thin! And healthy looking! And awesome!! 

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On 11/27/2018 at 4:38 AM, tracyringo said:

I have been called skinny Minnie a few times now by different people and I always think yeah right are they talking to me ?  Pictures are still the best way that I know to see where I am and where I have come from. I do look at others the same height and weight and think to myself their is no way I am the same size or smaller but I am .

 

I do this too and have done for a long time. I guess what really sticks in my head though is a couple of different dieticians who've described me as "skinny fat", that kind of undermines my logic that if "x person" is shorter than me, weighs more than me, and looks that thin....well I must be as well.  What makes the "skinny fat" comments worse is they've done that without taking any measurements etc, all one did was grab my excess skin on my arms to try to prove her point. People with actual medical degrees have not made any comments like dieticians have...I'll no longer go to any.

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3 hours ago, Aussie Bear said:

I do this too and have done for a long time. I guess what really sticks in my head though is a couple of different dieticians who've described me as "skinny fat", that kind of undermines my logic that if "x person" is shorter than me, weighs more than me, and looks that thin....well I must be as well.  What makes the "skinny fat" comments worse is they've done that without taking any measurements etc, all one did was grab my excess skin on my arms to try to prove her point. People with actual medical degrees have not made any comments like dieticians have...I'll no longer go to any.

:angry: Extra skin is not fat. I have to chant this at myself in the mirror each morning - I've got a few stubborn places where it hasn't gone away, and I try not to let them bother me. @Aussie Bear, with your foot rehabilitation limiting your mobility, you should be very proud of what you've been able to do. What a thing to go through, especially not long after your WLS. You're a champ. Don't let them tell you otherwise.

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