Ladybugzzz86

One month, but got to start somewhere ;)

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12 hours ago, Elisa said:

Lol, I wonder about that too.....I call it my fat blanket!

Comforts me when I need a hug 

Heats me when I'm cold

Protects me from people

 

I think I might need to buy a HUGE wool blanket to replace it!

While I don’t miss my fat, it took forever to see the thinner me.  I still can’t connect the old and new me but I’ve gotten used to the stranger looking back at me in a mirror, most of the time...

I sit on a heating pad with a blanket or an electric throw...

and I am no longer invisible...people hold the door for me, make conversation, make eye contact and smile at me..that makes me uncomfortable..but I no longer feel like the elephant in the room..I am no longer the largest person in the room..

 

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5 hours ago, Nana Trish said:

Cheekbones are those wonderful things hiding underneath that beautiful "extra" face skin, lol...just like your collar bones, wrist, hip and hand bones! 

And HELL NO!! I won't...don't, actually, miss my fat! And the thing I was most worried about, physically...the loose skin...is almost likeable? Every time I notice more loose skin or wrinkles on my bat wings, stomach or thighs, I know more weight/inches are falling off :) The only thing I actually miss? The days before WLS when my boobs didn't drag on the floor :lol:

Boobs may tighten up, as does some skin.  I actually think mine are better now than when I was heavy...i was pointing out my batwings and a friend who has always been thin and a little older told me that was nothing and showed me hers, lol!  I’ve always thought people look better with clothes and they hide my sags, bags and wrinkles...never have liked tight clothes so I’m good there as well..

and Bugzzzy-wait til you find collarbones!  I forgot I had them til someone pointed them out, lol! 

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16 hours ago, Cheesehead said:

Boobs may tighten up, as does some skin.  I actually think mine are better now than when I was heavy...i was pointing out my batwings and a friend who has always been thin and a little older told me that was nothing and showed me hers, lol!  I’ve always thought people look better with clothes and they hide my sags, bags and wrinkles...never have liked tight clothes so I’m good there as well..

and Bugzzzy-wait til you find collarbones!  I forgot I had them til someone pointed them out, lol! 

Lol @Cheesehead I can't wait! It is helping me make it through thus hospital stay. Stuff like that is what i daydream (autocorrect wanted to put bidet dream, lmfao) about in here, much like how kids think of puppies, unicorns, and horsies. 

Time for me to go do another lap around the nursing station circuit....

P.S. I had one person who had the nerve to talk about a 'fat' patient that used to be in this room before my arrival to my neighbour, then proceed to ask me "he are you in here because of a thyroid issue too?' ..

Like really? Lol. Not the brightest crayon in the box I guess. Had to just bite my lip and say no dear... While thinking to myself, you should have seen me last month if you think I'm bad now haha

Edited by Ladybugzzz86

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22 hours ago, Ladybugzzz86 said:

Cheekbones? What are these things you call... Cheekbones.... Hrmmmm lol! Can't say I remember ever seeing them, so that comment got me super excited Jen <3 ty for that :D

And thanks again @Nana Trish and @Cheesehead. Not to sound weird guys, but have you ever worried at all that you might miss your fat at all? I think I should invest in some body pillows until my mind readjusts to its surroundings lol. How ironic...

I'll tell you what I miss about my fat... the only thing I miss:  BEING WARM.  Every night I have to start a heating pad to heat the foot of my bed before I get in it... and then I try to make up for the 100+ I'm missing with about 100 lbs of BLANKET.  I am super super cold allllll the time.  Granted, the weather in New England this past week hasn't helped much, but even before that I was a shivering mess.

And I'm getting cheekbones now, and it's a bit weird!  I have to look at my work ID pic every time I go in to the office, and then I see myself in the bathroom mirror and it's like... this face... is not that face anymore!  I can also feel my collar bones really clearly, though I don't think they're actually visible yet.  My shoulder bones and my knee bones are, and my hip bones are suddenly a thing... it's just all very weird.  I try to think how it's going to feel when I'm another 50, another 100 down... but my brain can't get around it.  I'm actually kind of glad this process takes time... I'd probably have some sort of identity crisis if they could just give me a pill and make me skinny overnight!

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15 hours ago, Kio said:

I'll tell you what I miss about my fat... the only thing I miss:  BEING WARM.  Every night I have to start a heating pad to heat the foot of my bed before I get in it... and then I try to make up for the 100+ I'm missing with about 100 lbs of BLANKET.  I am super super cold allllll the time.  Granted, the weather in New England this past week hasn't helped much, but even before that I was a shivering mess.

And I'm getting cheekbones now, and it's a bit weird!  I have to look at my work ID pic every time I go in to the office, and then I see myself in the bathroom mirror and it's like... this face... is not that face anymore!  I can also feel my collar bones really clearly, though I don't think they're actually visible yet.  My shoulder bones and my knee bones are, and my hip bones are suddenly a thing... it's just all very weird.  I try to think how it's going to feel when I'm another 50, another 100 down... but my brain can't get around it.  I'm actually kind of glad this process takes time... I'd probably have some sort of identity crisis if they could just give me a pill and make me skinny overnight!

Well I don't think I will miss being warm too much, I have inherited these awful hot flashes from my mother. One person thought I was having a heart attack because of it hahaha, my bp is well within normal limits though do no worries there. But I do the same thing as you with warming the foot of the bed with a heating pad, which is not something I really ever have to do before. Happy to hear you have found your long lost bones @Kio, and I can't wait to rediscover mine someday as well. 

Today I am feeling a little discouraged just because my rings are a bit tight... I am puffy/swollen due to the many liters of fluids and bags of heparin being pumped into me. I was liking the flatter stomach before all this started... Miss it already. 

 

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23 minutes ago, Ladybugzzz86 said:

Today I am feeling a little discouraged just because my rings are a bit tight... I am puffy/swollen due to the many liters of fluids and bags of heparin being pumped into me. I was liking the flatter stomach before all this started... Miss it already.

Don't worry... you'll be back there in no time at all.  That water weight will zoom off! 

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26 minutes ago, Ladybugzzz86 said:

Well I don't think I will miss being warm too much, I have inherited these awful hot flashes from my mother. One person thought I was having a heart attack because of it hahaha, my bp is well within normal limits though do no worries there. But I do the same thing as you with warming the foot of the bed with a heating pad, which is not something I really ever have to do before. Happy to hear you have found your long lost bones @Kio, and I can't wait to rediscover mine someday as well. 

Today I am feeling a little discouraged just because my rings are a bit tight... I am puffy/swollen due to the many liters of fluids and bags of heparin being pumped into me. I was liking the flatter stomach before all this started... Miss it already. 

 

The flatter stomach and loose rings will return... this is a blip in the long-term road you're on. 

I found hip bones, knees that knock instead of being pushed apart by my thighs, skinny fingers, shoulder blades, even spine pieces visible that had been hidden... sometimes at night I find myself re-acquainting myself with my body. Wonderful if a bit weird at some moments. 

The being cold all the time is the Price We Pay. Awful!

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Yeah, you are so right @Kio and @BurgundyBoy. Have been doing my best to stay positive and focused, just had a little hiccup there. Ah well, better then a fart....:lol:

I need to focus on the whole season, and not just the first quarter of the first game... I am refocused again... Thank God for decaf tea... Helps calm the ol' nerves. ;)

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1 hour ago, Ladybugzzz86 said:

Well I don't think I will miss being warm too much, I have inherited these awful hot flashes from my mother. One person thought I was having a heart attack because of it hahaha, my bp is well within normal limits though do no worries there. But I do the same thing as you with warming the foot of the bed with a heating pad, which is not something I really ever have to do before. Happy to hear you have found your long lost bones @Kio, and I can't wait to rediscover mine someday as well. 

Today I am feeling a little discouraged just because my rings are a bit tight... I am puffy/swollen due to the many liters of fluids and bags of heparin being pumped into me. I was liking the flatter stomach before all this started... Miss it already. 

 

Oh hunny...don’t let that water weight discourage you!! I’ve been in the hospital a few times this year besides WLS, lol, and every time I gained 5 or 6 pounds at least. Like @Kio said, the water weight will be gone before you know it!!

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1 hour ago, BurgundyBoy said:

The being cold all the time is the Price We Pay. Awful!

^^^ Absolutely!! But it’s still worth it, IMO :D And I know you feel the same, @BurgundyBoy

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8 hours ago, BurgundyBoy said:

knees that knock instead of being pushed apart by my thighs

I bruised the insides of my knees the other day when they knocked together pretty hard <_<

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11 hours ago, BurgundyBoy said:

 

I found hip bones, knees that knock instead of being pushed apart by my thighs, skinny fingers, shoulder blades, even spine pieces visible that had been hidden... sometimes at night I find myself re-acquainting myself with my body. Wonderful if a bit weird at some moments. 

The being cold all the time is the Price We Pay. Awful!

My bed has possibly undergone more changes than I have since surgery. I have pillows everywhere, just protecting my bones from my other bones. Plus after the past winter I purchased a multi zone lambswool electric blanket. Not sure because I heard you yanks have electric blankets that go over your body, but here they are on the mattress warming your body from below. I'm not going to ever go through a winter like last year where I froze all the time. I've even bought a couple of pure wool Aran sweaters, along with a "bulky" knitting machine to make some more. Acrylics just don't keep me warm anymore and there are only so many layers you can wear.

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7 hours ago, Aussie H said:

My bed has possibly undergone more changes than I have since surgery. I have pillows everywhere, just protecting my bones from my other bones. Plus after the past winter I purchased a multi zone lambswool electric blanket. Not sure because I heard you yanks have electric blankets that go over your body, but here they are on the mattress warming your body from below. I'm not going to ever go through a winter like last year where I froze all the time. I've even bought a couple of pure wool Aran sweaters, along with a "bulky" knitting machine to make some more. Acrylics just don't keep me warm anymore and there are only so many layers you can wear.

You and me both Aussie.

I had to replace my regular mattress with a memory foam one, along with a firm body pillow because the pain of trying to sleep on my side was excruciating on my hips and knees.

And as for an electric blanket.  I have one on my bed and running all the year round.

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You are looking great! I found the first 4-6 weeks really hard after surgery .... extreme exhaustion and I struggled with my moods/emotions .... but then the cloud lifted and I started to feel so much better. So hang in there if you are struggling. I wasn't patient with myself and wanted to feel better sooner, but it takes time.

Are you in Halifax? My mother is from Lunenburg and she trained as a nurse at the VG many years ago! I love Nova Scotia and visit her there every summer.

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49 minutes ago, EMHMaine said:

You are looking great! I found the first 4-6 weeks really hard after surgery .... extreme exhaustion and I struggled with my moods/emotions .... but then the cloud lifted and I started to feel so much better. So hang in there if you are struggling. I wasn't patient with myself and wanted to feel better sooner, but it takes time.

Are you in Halifax? My mother is from Lunenburg and she trained as a nurse at the VG many years ago! I love Nova Scotia and visit her there every summer.

Thanks for that @EMHMaine - really appreciate your encouraging message. I am slightly struggling with my moods/emotions too really (especially being stuck in the hospital). I guess it would be strange if I wasn't though, right? Considering that I have been eating my emotions away for years lol. But with all things considered, I think I am handling things pretty good. . 

I lived in Halifax about ten years ago now, and my surgery was done there also. I am currently living in Cape Breton, close to the highlands and the Cabot Trail. I think its so cool that your mother got to train at the VG! What a small world, eh? ;)

Thanks again, and looking forward to getting to know you more. 

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I am way late to this thread! You're looking great so far! Congrats. Sounds like you had a really scary blood clot issue -- makes me feel a little bad for how much I whined about the blood thinners my doc put me on. (Three weeks of giving myself shots.) That was definitely worth it after all. So glad you're on the mend! 

I mentioned this someplace else: I don't miss any of my fat, but I do miss my clothes. :) And yeah, the being cold all the time thing has already started. I can't even imagine how cold I'll be when I get to onederland. Oy. 

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1 hour ago, kristinwitha_k said:

I am way late to this thread! You're looking great so far! Congrats. Sounds like you had a really scary blood clot issue -- makes me feel a little bad for how much I whined about the blood thinners my doc put me on. (Three weeks of giving myself shots.) That was definitely worth it after all. So glad you're on the mend! 

I mentioned this someplace else: I don't miss any of my fat, but I do miss my clothes. :) And yeah, the being cold all the time thing has already started. I can't even imagine how cold I'll be when I get to onederland. Oy. 

Better late than never, @kristinwitha_k;) And tyvm :D

Yeah it is a bit scary, not quite out of the woods yet - but I'm willing to knock down some trees to get there lol. Sorry you had to put up with those shots, they bother some people more than others for sure. But at least it was worth it, right? :)

 

 

 

 

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As usual, I am late to your thread. I’m sorry to hear about your health troubles. Hang in there and keep us posted! 

What I love most about your second picture is your beautiful smile. Your whole face is radiant! Congrats on leaving the 300 behind and hello to bones you never knew existed. :D

 

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Lol, you just keep trying to save the best for last I'm sure of it lol. Thanks so much for your wonderful comment, @NerdyToothpick. :D

I will say it is very nice to be able to smile again without feeling that my chubby cheeks are closing my eyes lmao. I am trying to just take one day at a time here, and focus on the long tern goal. Its been hard though, understandably i am sure. The food cravings, not too much of an issue at the moment, but feeling like a big blob because I am distended, bloated, and in pain. Ah well, it should all come together in the end ;)

--Bugzzzy

 

Edited by Ladybugzzz86

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13 hours ago, Ladybugzzz86 said:

Lol, you just keep trying to save the best for last I'm sure of it lol. Thanks so much for your wonderful comment, @NerdyToothpick. :D

I will say it is very nice to be able to smile again without feeling that my chubby cheeks are closing my eyes lmao. I am trying to just take one day at a time here, and focus on the long tern goal. Its been hard though, understandably i am sure. The food cravings, not too much of an issue at the moment, but feeling like a big blob because I am distended, bloated, and in pain. Ah well, it should all come together in the end ;)

--Bugzzzy

 

While you’ve been through more of a trial than most, trust that we all have felt like a blob. That will all go away and soon you will be as slim as Victoria’s Secret supermodel, @Nana Trish  

Hang in there! 

24EB9EFE-9C68-4E16-B937-D237A475154E.gif

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4 hours ago, NerdyToothpick said:

While you’ve been through more of a trial than most, trust that we all have felt like a blob. That will all go away and soon you will be as slim as Victoria’s Secret supermodel, @Nana Trish  

Hang in there! 

24EB9EFE-9C68-4E16-B937-D237A475154E.gif

I can't wait! @Nana Trish is such my role model, in addition to being a supermodel! I hope I will grow down one day and be just like her! :P

For reals though, can't picture myself being a healthy size, this journey is going to be amazing and I can't wait to be heathy again :D

Super motivated right now :)

 

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23 hours ago, NerdyToothpick said:

While you’ve been through more of a trial than most, trust that we all have felt like a blob. That will all go away and soon you will be as slim as Victoria’s Secret supermodel, @Nana Trish  

Hang in there! 

24EB9EFE-9C68-4E16-B937-D237A475154E.gif

Omg, @NerdyToothpick...stop it!!! No VS supermodels in this house, for sure, ugh...lol. My waist is still large enough to be at least 1 1/2 that of a model. But I've still lost around 20" from my waist. Just gotta figure out how to get rid of the last 13" or so.

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20 hours ago, Ladybugzzz86 said:

I can't wait! @Nana Trish is such my role model, in addition to being a supermodel! I hope I will grow down one day and be just like her! :P

For reals though, can't picture myself being a healthy size, this journey is going to be amazing and I can't wait to be heathy again :D

Super motivated right now :)

 

You and @NerdyToothpick are so sweet ❤️ You give me too much credit, lol. Nerdy is the one to look up to here...she has done an incredible job, and you will too!!! It's so hard in the beginning to imagine yourself at a healthy size, but you really will be a healthy size before you know it! 

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On 1/9/2018 at 8:04 AM, Ladybugzzz86 said:

Loving this idea.... Must invest in one so I don't fall off the wagon down the road and invest in kraft dinner instead xD

 

See? Thinking like a successful WLS patient already!! Buy the blanket, and kick the Kraft dinner to the curb!!!

IMG_2096.PNG

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1 hour ago, Nana Trish said:

See? Thinking like a successful WLS patient already!! Buy the blanket, and kick the Kraft dinner to the curb!!!

IMG_2096.PNG

Lmao, yay! I'm getting there hahaha. You know what? Its too funny because looking at that pic made me want KD even less, like I think my mind wanted it a little, now I am starting to realize I don't want it at all, nor the feeling I would get afterwords. :D

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