JennaG2014

You would think it would get easier.

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After more than 4 years from WLS, I am beginning to understand that it is never going to be easier for me to control myself. I still have to stop myself from taking that last bite on the plate just because it is all that is left. I have to remember that people aren't looking at me strangely because I am the fat person in the room. I can't use food as emotional support and instead have to deal with my grief, frustration and every other negative emotion in another way. 

The weight loss has been wonderful and life changing. I am honestly a much happier person, but on the days when I am feeling low I just wish that I didn't have those old desires creeping in to mess with my head. Others might have developed a new normal that takes away the daily struggle. But for me... it is a choice I make every single day. 

Sorry to be a downer. I am having a crappy day and needed a bit of a vent.

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Sorry to be a downer. I am having a crappy day and needed a bit of a vent.

I'm months out, not years, so I'm not where you are yet, but I do sympathize. Take care.

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not what I really wanted to hear but exactly how I feel.  why is it always so f*&$^ng hard!  whine whine whine. 

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It is hard and a daily endeavor to succeed in my opinion.  I was just making lunch and putting the 2 ounces of chicken I knew I should eat out.  There was just a little over the 2 ounces left (half ounce) and I thought, lets toss that on there as well, its only a half ounce.  That is a very dangerous slope for me, as just that little bit more won't matter mentality is the portion control issue that got me to over 400 pounds.  I don't think the struggle to control and keep my portions in line will ever go away.  That is why measuring and only eating what I measure is so important to me, it keeps things in control.

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It was so much easier the first six months after surgery for me.  Now, it's a daily struggle to keep everything in control.  Every single day is a battle.  I obsess with it every single day.  I've really grown quite tired of it.  Today, as you can tell from my tone, is a bad day.  Ugh.

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It is hard and a daily endeavor to succeed in my opinion.  I was just making lunch and putting the 2 ounces of chicken I knew I should eat out.  There was just a little over the 2 ounces left (half ounce) and I thought, lets toss that on there as well, its only a half ounce.  That is a very dangerous slope for me, as just that little bit more won't matter mentality is the portion control issue that got me to over 400 pounds.  I don't think the struggle to control and keep my portions in line will ever go away.  That is why measuring and only eating what I measure is so important to me, it keeps things in control.

I would have absolutely thrown the other 1/2 ounce on if that was all that was left.

I also am working on taking off that 40lbs I re-gain this year so...  I'm sure that paints a nice, bold picture...

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I hate to think of the hard road ahead...hopefully next year at this time I'll have found the "magic pill, 4 leaf clover or pot of gold at the end of the rainbow" and share it with you all! :lol:

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I would have absolutely thrown the other 1/2 ounce on if that was all that was left.

I also am working on taking off that 40lbs I re-gain this year so...  I'm sure that paints a nice, bold picture...

I came so close to tossing it on there.  It was a real struggle not too.

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It was so much easier the first six months after surgery for me.  Now, it's a daily struggle to keep everything in control.  Every single day is a battle.  I obsess with it every single day.  I've really grown quite tired of it.  Today, as you can tell from my tone, is a bad day.  Ugh.

Same here. I am the type of person that struggles with the little voice in my head that says. "oh go on and eat it, it's the last bite." I am also the person that struggles to keep from piling food on top of emotional pain. So my "bad day" usually involves emotional issues as well.  

I wish I could shine a bright light on the future for everyone and tell you that 4 years out you will have no stress about your weight and that you will automatically portion out your meals with no need for measuring cups or scales. HA! I wish. The crappy truth is that I believe that most, if not all, of us will have to watch ourselves for the rest of our lives and some days that just plain sucks.

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I admire the honesty, determination, and perspective you guys offer on the hard things! Thank you for sharing!!

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I hate to think of the hard road ahead...hopefully next year at this time I'll have found the "magic pill, 4 leaf clover or pot of gold at the end of the rainbow" and share it with you all! :lol:

Remember that there is no end of the rainbow. It simply comes full circle. Any apparent end is an illusion because something got in the way.

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I must tell myself a hundred times a day-you don't really need that.  Or "do you realize see how many calories are in that?!"  I am slowly listening to my tummy and not my head.  If my tummy is telling me no more, I'd better listen.  That one more bite isn't worth the rolling on the floor pain.  My daughter looked at me with disbelief the other day when I passed 2 bites off to my hubby.  He told her, "she knows when she's had enough".  (Not always)

 

Edited by Cheesehead

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Great topic and, yes, some days are a struggle! Thank you for sharing. I for one did not lose the desire to medicate with food. Sticking to plan is what works for me. When I deviate that spells trouble.

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