tmcgee

I'm not a stranger to loss

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My 63 year old sister died between 1 and 3 AM on Saturday, same age as my dad when he went. She had a lung removed a year ago and it was followed by a brain tumor. She’s been in hospice for several months and her mind has been somewhere else for a few weeks.

She worked at the Boise Cascade headquarters in marketing for 40 years and when she retired last year, she never got to enjoy her retirement and decent pension. Her sons and their families, including grandsons live in Boise as well. I've never lost a sibling before.

You want to share a memory or new discovery with someone and they just are not there anymore. It happens almost every day. All of my friends that I grew up with, except for one, are gone now.

I'm struggling.
Edited by tmcgee

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Tom, I'm so sorry for your loss. There aren't any words...

Keep your memories near and dear to your heart.

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I'm so sorry tom, I know how much this has been weighing on you.

Keep her memory alive in your heart.

Xoxo

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I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.

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I didn't realize how close she was to the end. I've never lost a sibling, but I only have one, and we are relatively young. I can only imagine what you're going through.

Tom, I'm sorry to hear about your sister and that you're struggling. My thoughts are with you.

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Tom I am so sorry to hear of your struggles, I am sending love and hugs your way. I have a brother and can only imagine what you're experiencing.

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Tom my heart goes out to you.   One might think that having experienced multiple losses would help you to navigate your grief...my experience has been that they simply stack on top of each other and make the burden heavier.   All I can offer you is my support, and know that you are in my thoughts.   If you ever need to talk, you know how to reach me.   Hugs to you during this very sad time in your life. 

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I am truly sorry to hear of your loss Tom.

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Tom, I'm so sorry to hear this. Even when "prepared" we never are. It leaves a big hole. Hopefully, that hole will fill with all the good memories as time passes. Thinking of you.

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Aw Tom, loss and grief are so hard.  I've not lost a sibling so can't claim to know exactly what you're feeling, but I think most people of a certain age have enough experience with loss to know that it hurts.  A lot.  Sixty-three is so young; my Dad was 63 when he died of a brain tumor and it just seemed so unfair that he never got to enjoy retirement after working hard his whole life. 

 

What I know from the losses in my life is that the pain eventually gets softer; doesn't go away but becomes easier to bear.  That is my prayer for you; that eventually the pain softens and beautiful memories bring a smile instead of pain. 

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tom,

I know what you are going through! I lost 2 brothers within 18 months of each other. you have my deepest sympathy.

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Tom, I am so very sorry,  death of someone close causes us to review our own life and I am sure you have done that 1000 times.   I pray peace for you and your family.  Karen

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So sorry for your loss . I loss my brother who was 26 yrs old and was killed by a 12 gauge shotgun in 1981 . I was living in Texas at the time and move right back to New York to be close to my other brother and sister . Unforgettably to put everything away like people say to do in some corner of your mind . I never could and think about it all the time . I hope and pray that you can find the strength to deal with this .

God bless

Mike

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Sixty-three is so young; my Dad was 63 when he died of a brain tumor and it just seemed so unfair that he never got to enjoy retirement after working hard his whole life. 

 

 

Exactly the same thing happened to my Dad at the same age. He did retire at 60, but couldn't stand it after two weeks and found another job.

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I'm sorry for your loss. May your memories bring you comfort.

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I'm so sorry to hear of your loss Tom. My prayers are with you and your family.

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So sorry to hear this sad news.  You and your family are in our thoughts. 

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So sorry for your loss Tom. It's hard when someone close dies and especially when they are so young. May your memories of her comfort you and live on forever!

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I'm so sorry Tom. Remember the good times..

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I'm so sorry for your loss. We lost my dad almost 2 years ago, he was 62. He was diagnosed with lung cancer about 3 years before he passed, literally less than a year away from retirement. So when he finally did get to retire he spent that time going to chemo appts and knowing he had incurable cancer. Then about a year and a half before he passed he suffered a massive stroke which left him without the use of his left side. Everyday all I could think was how unfair this was. He worked hard his entire life, he deserved and should have been able to enjoy his retirement. I don't know what your beliefs are but I truly believe that he is in a better place, whether one thinks of it as heaven or the afterlife or whatever, I know I'll see him again one day. I talk to him all the time and I tell him when I have news and I know he's listening. In fact, knowing that he is up there watching my back is a big reason I finally got the nerve to have my surgery. We will never stop grieving or stop missing them but it does get easier to smile when I think of him and all the great memories I have. Watch for signs from her, you'd be surprised :)

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I'm very sorry about the loss of your sister. 

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I'm very sorry about the loss of your sister.

My sister lived in Boise for the last 40 years.

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my heart breaks for you, light and love sweet man

Edited by leigha

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I am so sorry Tom!  I lost my brother a little over 3 years ago - he was 47 and killed himself. I think we all know that we will lose our parents and maybe when we are really old eventually our siblings, but not this soon. A loss of a sibling is hard, especially if you were close. Like someone else said I will pray for you that the grief gets softer as times goes on because it never goes away. Family get togethers are never quite the same as there is a void, but I can say 3 years later that it does get to be a new normal - never the same but we talk about my brother and share stories all the time.

 

Big hugs!!!!

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