Smylin

Why can't we eat like normal people?

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My son is concerned about me. He is a nutrition expert and is concerned that at 16 months out and 200 lbs total loss, I have developed a slight eating disorder and talks to me every day about what I am eating, what I am thinking, and what kind of exercise I am doing. He is very glad that I had the surgery and changed my life, because he knows that the possible side effects of the surgery are far less risky than the results of weighing 350 lbs as I once did, but he wants to make sure that I am healthy overall and continue to make the "right" choices.

I also need to mention that just before he became a nutrition and fitness expert, he battled with his weight and body image. He stopped eating to lose his baby fat in high school and ended up in the hospital before we realized what was going on. Then we began to educate him and he has been fine ever since. But he knows first hand what a mental battle there can be when you have a poor body image and when you live in fear every day of gaining the weight back. That is what he is fearful of for me. So he is encouraging me to eat more calories and especially more carbs because of the exercising that I am doing.

He believes that now that I have lost more weight than I need to, I should be able to eat regular sized portions of healthy choices for someone of my size, age, and activity level and maintain my weight in the range I want it to be. I am afraid that eating like a normal person will make me weigh 350 lbs again. He says that's part of the "mini eating disorder" that has to be developed when you go through a rapid weight loss journey like this. Do you think he is right or I am right?

He says I'm not feeding my muscles what they need right now because I am exercising and need to give my body more fuel. I have a hard time explaining to him why eating a regular size portion of at least some foods makes me feel lethargic and even sick sometimes. I don't know how to explain it to him scientifically so that he understands the difference between my body now and a non-RNY person. Can anyone help me with the right words that he will understand? He is pre-med, so that's what he understands.

What do you all think about the eating like a regular person thing? If we eat like normal healthy people, will we be healthy or fat?

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You can't eat like a regular person - physically can't.  Your stomach is the size of an egg.   So hold up an egg and say -  Here, this is how big my stomach is and how much food it can hold at once.

 

How many calories, protein, carbs are you averaging?  There are ways to increase consumption - healthily - without resorting to overstuffing your tiny pouch. 

Edited by Jolls

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I'm a proponent of eating all the same kinds of food people who didn't have WLS eat, of course in balance with our nutritional goals. So I like to think I eat normal in that way. However, the blunt reality is that our stomachs are changed and we can't eat like people who didn't have WLS. As a sleeve I cannot eat the portion sizes my 111 pound wife can, I just can't in fit that much food. By having GBP you have that along with specific food considerations, he needs to know that.

I explain my sleeve this way. "My stomach is small and is not capable of stretching larger to the degree it once did, it is not possible for me to fit in what most people consider a normal portion size." If they have trouble understanding that I hold up a sharpie to show them an approximate size of my stomach, that usually drives it home. Perhaps a similar illustration with a balloon would help your son visualize things. Just an idea.

With all that said it is obvious your son loves you and only wants the best for you, how wonderful our children are. I don't know how many calories you eat but it is important to keep calories in check with our exercise. Might be worth validating.

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You can't eat like a regular person - physically can't.  Your stomach is the size of an egg.   So hold up an egg and say -  Here, this is how big my stomach is and how much food it can hold at once.

Egg idea is better than mine with the balloon, do that. :-)

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If you are exercising, eating according to what the NUTs advise, and are generally healthy, then YOU know you are doing the right thing. Perhaps your son could join you the next time you go for a follow-up? And Jolls is absolutley correct. If I ate quantity that a "normal" person, even a skinny "normal,." I would be sick and in pain. Sometimes I am uncomfortable anyway after I eat. He means well, and obviously loves you! But to answer your question about whether we would be skinny or fat, the answer is: we would sick and miserable.. at least immediately afterwards.

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He may be a nutrition expert but he's not a WLS nutrition expert at all. If he doesn't get it maybe he needs to speak to people in his field who do.

My question is, is he overweight now? It seems like people who are overweight are usually the ones who have the worst reaction to our eating patterns.

If you could eat like a "normal" person and not gain weight you wouldn't need the surgery would you?

Be isn't being logical. It's not an eating disorder if it is medically advised. Some people obviously need way below what is considered a normal amount of calories.

If you have energy, feel good, meet your protein and fluid goals and you take your vitamins, you are fine!

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at almost 3 years out, I eat like a regular person.  My pouch has stretched (or relaxed, I guess) a little and thankfully isn't egg sized anymore.  And while I eat regular food, my portions are more what a "normal" person would eat rather than what a fat person would eat. I can eat maybe 6 ounces of a lean protein at a sitting with a little veggies or a small salad to go with it.   I watch carbs but eat some.  I eat lots of protein and veggies and maybe 70-100 grams of carbs daily.  Sometimes more, sometimes less. I can always tell if I've had too many because it wipes me out so I cut back bigtime the next day.

 

There ya go.  a normal meal that a normal, thin person would eat.  I'm not scared that I will get fat eating like that.  I AM, however, scared of too many carbs.  I would rather poke my eye out with a hot poker than regain that weight.

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I can't eat like a normal person, and I doubt I will ever be able to.  But it's ok with me.  I don't NEED to go back to eating like a normal person.  That's what caused my weight problems to begin with.  Stick with what you are comfortable with and everything else will fall into place.

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I'm much like HC at 2 years out. I feel i can eat Normal whatever that means. My pouch can hold a lot more than in the beginning THANKFULLY. No way would i wanna only be able to hold 1 oz of food forever at a time. I mean i'd weigh 80 pounds or less if that was the case. I do dump on fats, sugars or sugar alcohols. I eat healthy foods, but do allow in other things folks do not. I exercise 5x a week and lift weights in hopes of gaining muscle. I want to get my weight up to 130 as i'm not happy with how my body looks in the teens. 

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My doctor advises carbs to be 1/3 to 1/2 the amount of protein. So if you have 70 grams of protein, carbs should be no more than 35.

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Best to stay with your program's plan. The people who don't, get obese again.

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