I so understand what you are going tnrough. I am suppose to get my surgery date Sept 20th. I am 36 and my husband is 40. We have 1 child, who is 15 and want another one. So my dilemma is do I have a baby then the surgery or go ahead with the surgery as planned? I have already lost the 25 pounds and have done all the other requirements for my insurance. I am so confused and really stressed out about it. I am so afeaid if I go ahead witn my surfery something will happen and I will not have another child. But then I am so close and have worked so hard.
Thank you for your honest post. I am suppose to get my surgery date Sept. 20th but I am so nervous. I am afraid of regret. I have lost 25 pounds so far , in about 8 months, while waiting on my surgery. But yet, I had to in order for them to pay for it. I keep thinking, I have done it on my own so far do I really need to have the surgery? How much pain were you in afterwards? How long did you stay in the hospital?
Hmm. Yours is a common circumstance. Just want to post that the chances of you maintaining the weight loss without WLS are about 1%. Yes you might lose 200 gazillion pounds. Almost everyone regains it because our bodies are designed to think we are starving to death. The chances you will beat your genes and your body set point are really really low. If you need to for emotional reasons, put the surgery off, and then when you regain your weight, set the surgery up again next year. Only then your metabolic set point will be lower and it will all be harder. There is a reason why this is the only scientifically proven way to lose weight. Dieting doesn't work. If it did work we wouldn't have so much obesity. You know this as well as I do.
Be coldblooded and think this through. You ask about regret. Everyone regrets something. I regret not being able to eat to excess like I used to. But I got my life back. Statistically I have 13 extra years of life now compared to what I would have had given my weight and medical conditions. Is that regret worth the momentary pleasure of a big pizza or a rack of ribs? I don't think so... "eat an entire pizza or get 13 more years of life... hmm, hard to make that choice...")
Most (more than 95%) people are in the hospital just overnight after surgery unless they have medical conditions that make the surgery harder or make their recovery from surgery less straightforward. Once in a while one of us has a leak or problems getting enough in after surgery. The odds of this happening are low. Recently someone with undiagnosed sleep apnea had to stay longer and posted about it. She had to stay in hospital because her oxygens were low. Well, that is what sleep apnea does to you. The surgery didn't do it to her, she had the condition and it is dangerous. I had sleep apnea by the way, couldn't tolerate the mask, and it was terrible. It is now completely gone.
You also ask about pain. From the perspective of someone who has had a lot of back pain for decades, the pain from WLS is minor. Let's get real, this is minor surgery that you stay overnight for. This is not major surgery now, given the laparoscopy techniques. Most of us are essentially or nearly pain free within a week of surgery. The only pain I ever get now is when I try to eat too much and my stomach says no. I assure you that is a really really effective way to control over-eating! And the drugs my surgeon gave me worked.
The pains you are likely to suffer from being obese and staying obese far outweigh this.
I wrote this a month or two back and have copied it here. It was in response to why I chose a sleeve and would I do it again.
Hi @swanfray, excuse the long post but this may be of interest to you and to others lurking about, looking at the Forum.
Risks are low. Over 90% of people have no complications. I find it useful to look at numbers and not the "let me scare you to death" garbage on the internet. Your surgeons should have information to give you on their success and complication rates. The experience of your surgeon is important; newbie surgeons have more complications occur in their patients. (I chose a very highly experienced surgeon).
Surgical death rates (let's be blunt) are about 1 per 1,000 for VSG, and about 1.5 per 1,000 for bypass. Complications tend to occur in people at the highest risk for other reasons - if your diabetes has been out of control, heart attacks in the past, smoking... but of course if you have diabetes out of control and have had heart attacks your life span is already statistically short(er). Elsewhere here on the Forum we talk about the risks avoided by having surgery. People tend to focus on the surgery and forget they are at very elevated risks of death because of obesity (hypertension, diabetes, sleep apnea, etc etc.). Overall death rates go DOWN because the immediate small risk of death more than balances out the longer-term but much higher risks of obesity.
Don't forget that the gastric sleeve was devised as the first step in a 2-step procedure for doing the bypass in high-risk people. First the sleeve, then several months later, the bypassing of the first part of the small intestine as the second procedure. People found that the weight loss with the first part of the staged procedure was pretty good, and some patients probably said "let's hold on the second stage since I am losing so much weight" and well there you have it.
Yes complication rates are higher for bypass - you are having more done, your intestines are being cut and reconnected... but the rates for both are similar to those for elective (no emergency) gall bladder removal. If you are willing to drive a car for 10 years then your risks would be about the same, since the risks for driving a car are about 1 death in 10,000 people per year. If you aren't petrified by the prospect of riding in a car for 10 years then you shouldn't be petrified of the surgery, at least if we are rational people (but most of us, including me, are not).
Leaks happen in about 1% of people. Everyone has a test to look for a leak the day after surgery. More leaks occur after bypass than sleeve - more being done to re-route you with a bypass. Strictures are more common after bypass because the main course of the intestine is cut and reconnected, unlike what happens with a sleeve. GERD is more common after a sleeve. Dumping and rapid alcohol intoxication is more common after a bypass. About 1 in 5 people with a bypass develop a nutrient deficiency unless they take vitamins and minerals (much lower for sleeves, but numbers not accurately known). Bypass is a bit more effective overall for weight loss but the difference between the two is not very big. Bypass looks like it is more effective at curing diabetes but how much more effective is unclear.
If you look at complication rates that are not lethal, a lot of surgery is classified as having a complication because the person had nausea or puked a few times. Some drugs keep me from peeing, I get urinary retention. That happened after my surgery; I just asked the team to stop the un-needed medicine I was on that had caused it, and 8 hours later I peed fine. Hard to get excited over stuff like that. I am NOT trying to minimize this class of complications but it is important to have some perspective.
The "average" person does not lose all their excess weight, even after bypass. The average person may not stick to the diet, may not have their psych issues addressed, may have only poor social support, or may not get any exercise. Each of these has been proven to be important to weight loss. Here you will be supported to address each of these, and my guess is that your chance of success is higher if you make a good faith effort to have these in place. Not 100% perfect, but reasonable adherence to the diet, not be overtly crippled by psych issues and food, have some social support, and do even just modest exercise. My two cents is that while the average weight loss is different for the two = perhaps 70% for bypass, 60% for sleeve - what we see here on the TT Forum is that a lot of people are in the 70-110% excess weight loss, irrespective of the type of surgery, because their HEADS are in the right place. The key is NOT the surgery, it is the HEAD issues. So, after all this ... (sorry for the long post!)...
I would choose my surgery based on what you are trying to accomplish. Do a bypass if you have diabetes that is bad or have significant GERD. Do a sleeve if you want to avoid any chance of malabsorption or want to avoid the small but real difference in complication rates between the two. You can do a modest amount of exercise and make up the difference between a sleeve and the bypass in terms of "average" weight loss.
THE KEY though is keeping your head. Surgery only changes your intestines, not the person in charge of your life after surgery. If you do the head stuff right then the flavor of surgery is not very important.
(Again, sorry for the long post)
I had minor pains not so bad I stayed in the hospital for 2 nights and a day , don't get me wrong I do not regret the surgery I just think it's my mind having a hard time breaking up with the foods that got me this way in the first place I've been eating whatever I liked for around 35 years it's not easy changing a long time habit but I'm learning everyday I'm going on a month I'm doing a lil better but I'm still a newbie like I said everyone's journey is different !!!! Good luck
I am trying to lose the last 3 pound my insurance requires before they will approve my surgery. Problem is I only have about a week left to do it. I am doing a liquid diet but have a comstant headache and absolutly no energy. Not to mention how crabby Iam. What am I doing wrong, or is this normal?