CheeringCJ

I have a dear friend who has struggled with me for weigh for 20 yrs now. She lives in another state so we rarely see each other. I did tell her about the surgery beforehand. She had a lot of questions. She told me she doesn't agree with it for her but was very supportive of it for me and has been all along. So being a friend is being a friend no matter if you would make the same decision or not. That being said I feel terrible for leaving her in the dust. She is still struggling. When I hit goal two wks ago she said how proud she was of me.and how.happy for me she is. But then she said "on your journey have you found any thing that works (other than surgery) for losing?". I can't honestly, none of us could've which is how we ended up here. I feel bad about it and seeming like I'm boasting when we know she's still struggling (I never bring up my WL unless she brings it up first). My daughter and daughter in law have the same problem....they have both actually gained weight since I've been losing and I don't know how to deal with it bc I feel like they must be jealous and I'm not sure how to react. The never mention my wieght loss anymore. My DIL gave me her work clothes that don't fit anymore two months ago when I started work but I'm careful never to let her see me in them bc I don't know.what kind of feelings they'd bring up to her. It's just such a sensitive topic. I'm never sure how to address it. If anyone came to me and asked me about the surgery, I'd be happy to talk about it. I just don't know what to say to everyone who is still struggling. Dieting is like treading water....you never really get anywhere but you exhaust yourself physically and emotionally trying. I can't tell them THAT!!

It's been absolutely a break neck speed I've been functioning at for the past few weeks. Our oldest daughter had a new baby (our 5th grandchild!) and I got to be there for the birth again, one of our sons graduated, my husband's car died which left us scrambling for a few days searching the web for a good deal that we could pay cash for and we found a terrific car for only $7K, my husband is having his ordination service this weekend and I am hosting a party/reception for 150 ppl afterwards, the kids program I run at church (3yr-5th gr) started up last week (I have to organize my 25 leaders, write the curriculum and teach two classes every week) and our dear friend passed away suddenly Tuesday, leaving a vacancy in the preschool room so I had to go in there and teach last night which was very difficult to do. Saturday we have her funeral (my husband is doing that) and our granddaughter's dance recital and then back to church to set up for the reception. So it's a mixed bag of joy and sorrow and a whole lot of late nights and work. The long and short of it, is life is precious ....and I CAN DO this! I haven't stress eaten or turned to my long lost friend, the refrigerator. It may be hard to keep up emotionally but physically I got this. I remember back in the day when I'd get so overwhelmed that I'd nearly give up. Now with my new sleeve, my new body, my new brain and my new outlook, I don't get that same way. I still feel plenty confident that there is nothing God and I can't handle together. (Addendum: I wrote this yesterday morning but didn't have a chance to post it bc my brother in law got rushed to the ER with chest pains (he was fine in the end) so my husband rushed up to be with him. He was there for ten minutes when he (my husband) dropped his phone, bent over to pick it up, and passed out and hit his head on his brother's bed! So then they threw him on a stretcher and checked him into the ER! Turns out my husband was fine...he was prepping for his colonoscopy today so he was on just a liquid diet but he hadn't had anything yet (just a little water) when he rushed off to the hospital so his blood sugar had dropped (he's not used to the difference of fasting with being diabetic now) plus his BP was low bc he has lost weight and his BP meds are too much for him (his doc had cut them in half but may have to cut them out altogether). So anyway, another brother of theirs left work to rush in and be at the ER with BOTH of them! I told him to be careful bc there is only one more brother that could come help him out if he ends.up as.a patient, and he lives far away in Florida!!! What a bizarre day, right?!? You cant make this stuff up....my life is indeed interesting to say the least! I was keeping my adult kids informed via group chat and they were cracking me up talking about how the guys were doing a three stooges schtick there..."paging Dr Howard, Dr Fine and Dr Howard"! Haha! At least we can all laugh about their crazy day.) As for my past month, the scale didn't move tons, which was disappointing, but one day into my 7th month and I got to my doctor's goal weight of 170 he set for me to lose in the first 12-18 months! Then I went up a few, down one for days and now I am consistently in my 160s (168.6, whew!) and pretty content there. My personal goal is 160 and I would be thrilled with that. I know that is totally doable now (where beforehand I doubted even 170 was doable....I hadn't been there is years. Last time I was in my 160s, the calendar was in the 1980s!!!!). (addendum #2: down more weight today...down to 166.4!!!! I've been losing every day this week...like back on the beginning! Whoo hoo! I'll take it!) I am in a size 14 pants and a L top. My pants always look big so I get a new smaller size that seems snug until I look in the full length mirror at work and see the baggy thighs and then I know it's time to go lower again! (Again, I'll take that!) My husband and I walk 3 miles (5 makes total for the day). most every night except when it rains. I don't make excuses. Last night I was emtionally and physically drained when we got home from church (where I was running the kids program and teaching my departed friend's class in her place) so that would've meant come home, grab a snack (or two) and crash on the sofa. Last night, it meant have a cheese stick and go walk three miles for an hour with my hubby! I like my new life! I have my 6th month check up next week with my bariatric surgeon and nutritionist (a month late bc I needed the new insurance). I'll be interested to see my lab work afterwards. I'm sure he will be proud I made it to his goal already. As for the way I look, I'll post my pic but I couldn't notice any difference. However I know I don't hate my pics that candidly get snapped. (I don't have to edit them and crop out my butt or fat arm etc) Between my new grandbaby and my son's graduation I've had lots of pics I didn't know were being taken and I am shocked at how different I look. Oddly enough, our oldest DTR was behind us taking pics (see attached) at the grad and I was so surprised that my shoulders and the back of my neck were normal looking ( they used to be very rounded and almost hunched looking ).That is a nice surprise I never thought about as a result from my surgery. I'm adjusting well to my new job and I'm fine with the fact that I'm not off during the summer like when I was teaching. I am getting to know my co-workers which is much easier when I'm not so self conscious of myself. I have a walking buddy that walks as fast as I do so we can get about 1.75 miles in during our our 30 min lunch. Last night my husband was prepping for his colonoscopy (translate: couldn't leave the house) So I walked without him last night. I got 10K steps but then kept walking. I had a call to make about the party we're hosting this weekend and so I just did that while I kept walking. Ended up with 14K steps! I also added HIIT into it and did half the track speed walking or light jogging and was fine, not work out. So all in all I am in a great place and loving it. Never a millisecond of regret!!!

whoooo hooooo!!!! Congrats! i love the fact you thought it couldn't be YOU but it was your scale that was "broken". Too funny!

Truth be told, I occasionally do a double-take at times!!! I don’t recognize me thinner either!!! And your 20 yr old is right, you are so pretty!!!

@Kio glad to see you survived the move and you’re settling in. How did your pup make the move? Hope she is happy there, after her trauma she deserves happy...bet she loves running around in a bigger house! It is hard to stick to your plan when life is nuts, so glad you had your wake up call and are right back on track!!! Don’t be a stranger now

Not at her weight....she will sink like you do!!!

Then I will meet you and Katja there and we will all go swimming!

right, Nerdy??? Geesh! She should make Leah unpack so WE can visit!!! We need you,, @Kio...can you come out and play?!?!?!

did you have high blood pressure before (or do you take meds for it?) bc losing weight brings that down and yours sounds low (you should get it checked out) bc it sounds like orthostatic hypertension. if you're home when that happens, try sitting down or better yet, lying down and if it goes away, that usually means it is that (OH, or in laymnen's terms "postural hypotension") that being said, I had those symptoms a lot in the beginning and even called my dr about them. never did figure it out (except that i was still recovering from surgery....could be low blood sugar....dehydration....etc) but by 5 wks post op it was gone, so I would think that you'd be past that, so I would mention it to your dr when you see them.

just the fact you were still smiling in some of them (after all you went through) is amazing!! and watching you melt away is fun! You look very happy! Keep up the good work, I know you will definitely hit 100# down, it is just a matter of when and not if! Happy 6 month surgerversary!!!!

I wouldn't let that be my intro line, but if you realized this might be turning into something special and you were having feelings for each other, and you felt comfortable in sharing then that would be when....not too soon. I think you will be relieved as to how easily a guy that cares about you will take it. It isn't threatening to him at all so he won't mind. And don't think about it being "embarrassing", I bet you will find it was really nothing at all to worry about, that it will be very easy to share when the time comes. When someone loves you it isnt' because you have or having had WLS, they love YOU and that is just a part of who you are. And honestly he'll get a better "bargain" anyway, because you will change WAY more than you think you will...it was your digestive system they worked on, but seriously, it changes everything, your thinking, your outlook, your life, so he will just have more and more things about you to love!!!

@Kio,. Miss you! I figure you're busy with your move but just wanted to check in on you just to make sure all was ok. Stop in when you can.

Welcome back. I think staying connected with people going through the same thing is a huge help so being here is a great idea!

Better today??? Gas is a nasty thing....be it inside of you or outside, it's all around nasty. Hope it passed (literally!)

So fun! And the perspective is right, diabetes in remission is definitely#1, but being able to fit in little toothpick jeans, ranks right on up there in the satisfaction gauge!!!!