Nana Trish

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About Nana Trish

  • Rank
    TT Master
  • Birthday April 6

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    New York
  • Age
    51

Information

  • Surgeon
    Dr. Dmitri Baranov
  • Hospital
    Saratoga Hospital
  • Height (ft-in)
    5-06
  • Start Weight
    336.6
  • Current Weight
    147
  • Goal Weight
    175
  • Body Mass Index (BMI)
    23.7
  • Surgery Date
    05/17/2017
  • Surgery Type
    Gastric Bypass

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4,639 profile views
  1. Nana Trish

    Another nursing home visit...and more momma drama

    Wise words from a wise man (and a very wise TTF vet!!) Thank you, @Res Ipsa. No worries, I don't drive at all...so no worries there. I am working hard to get plans in place for the Boston get together...hubby thinks (as do I) that it's important for me and my well being to meet you all. If he can get his work schedule all set, we will be there. I probably won't know for sure until a couple of weeks before, but it's on the very top of my priority list right now! ❤️❤️❤️
  2. So I'll start with the better stuff first. I went back to the nursing home for another visit with my grandmother on Friday afternoon. She was having a very decent, alert day. It was so completely different than the last time. She was smiling, chatty, and was just in good spirits. She kept repeating how tired she was (I guess the nurses had her up in the wheel chair for quite a while the day before) but from the looks of her, you'd never know she was that tired. She didn't know who I was for most of this visit, but there were a few fleeting moments that she did. But even if it meant her never remembering me again, I would love to see her have more days like that. She was even scarfing down a bowl of jello with whipped cream, after repeatedly saying she wasn't hungry, lol. And she was asking for chocolate when my mother was there a few days ago, so we brought her some Hershey's miniatures, which she just devoured. Well a couple of them, anyway. She did keep asking me if she could come home with me, which is one of the harder parts of all of this...and I just told her "Another day". That seemed to make her feel better. And of course there were lots of I love you's and forehead kisses again. I just love her so much ❤️ Now on to more stressful events. I have had contact with my mother again...as you have probably guessed by my posts. She called me out of the blue a couple of weeks ago. We were in the middle of Walmart, and my phone rang. Her contact pic came up, and I couldn't even answer it. I asked my poor hubby to do it. He didn't mind, but then again he never does. He's so laid back and easy going, and he knows how worked up I get when my mother gives me these little surprise calls, etc. So he told her that I wasn't available at the moment and that I'd call her back. I heard him answering questions, and he kept saying no...she is trying to lose the weight...she's not sick, I promise. UGH. She doesn't know about my WLS, and believe it or not, if she did know, the questioning would be even more relentless. She had been hospitalized back in April for an ulcer, so I did go up to see her. She mentioned my weight loss then, because she hadn't seen me since I think February and I had lost about 10 more pounds since she had seen me last, so I knew more questions were coming. It truly takes me an hour of mental prep before I can talk to her. So I called her back. She asked me how I was doing. She said she missed hearing my voice and missed seeing me. I asked her how she had been feeling since coming home from the hospital. We talked about that for a while. Then she started talking about my grandmother and of course I asked her how gram was doing. She filled me in, and then said if I wanted to go for a visit, she would take me. Not ideal by any means, but I figured if I went with her it wouldn't be as awkward as it would be if I went with David (because gram doesn't know David very well and I didn't know how well that would work). And by that, I meant the awkwardness of seeing gram for the first time. It's ALWAYS awkward when I'm around my mother. So in order to wrap up the call, I made plans to go with her to see gram. That was my first visit last week. I'm trying to plan as many visits as I can to see her, because I don't know how much time she has left. It could be weeks, or even months. I don't want to let a lot of time go between visits though, no matter how much time she has left. *Deep breath* as I continue to ramble...if you're still with me this far, THANK YOU!!! We were supposed to go see her again this past Tuesday, which is a day I'm usually Harper free. At the last minute, my daughter told me that Harper's other nana couldn't take him that day and asked if I could. Of course...you all know how much I love my Harper!! So I had to call my mother to reschedule. Which I knew would lead to an hour long discussion. And it did. She went on to tell me how much she had been looking forward to seeing me again, and how lonely she was, and what was she going to do to stay busy that day.......so I told her to just come over and hang out with me and Harper that day. Ugh again. She came over and started talking about how she's going to put her house on the market because she can't handle the yard work anymore since dad passed, and it's so lonely out there (she lives on the outskirts of her town...beautiful property, but very secluded), and how she's stressing about telling my sister that she is putting the house up for sale. Because my sister has always thought that my folks were going to leave her the house. There is still a mortgage on the house, but my sister doesn't seem to get any of this. I don't know if you guys can see where this is all leading yet, but you will. So she tells me at first that she is going to buy my grandmothers house. It's right next door to two of my uncles, and it's in my town, so at least with my uncles being right there, she wouldn't be alone. I say that sounds like a great idea. It's a much smaller plot of land than she has now (she's on 5 acres at the moment, and I think grams is like one acre), and she would be able to do what little yard work that would require by herself. Or at least with the help of my uncles. So by the time she is ready to leave that day, I'm under the impression that she is planning to do what we discussed. And she drops the little bombshell on me the she had had a fight with my sister a couple of weeks ago, which I knew immediately that was the reason for her sudden interest in reconnecting with me. She has always played my sister and I against each other, so when she's mad at one, the other is the "good" daughter, and visa versa. So she left that day after we had made plans to go see gram on Friday instead, because Harper's other Nana agreed to switch days so I could go. At this point, my anxiety and stress is starting to get the better of me, because I know I can expect a barrage of phone calls, with my mother looking to bad mouth my sister, etc...and I realize that I have fallen into the trap...AGAIN. And guess who else comes knocking at the door...Ms. MANIA...UGHx3!!! Sooo... (and I truly do apologize for the length and intimate nature of this post...but I have to get this out or I'm gonna lose it) We are back to Friday's visit. After we left the nursing home, she asks if I want to go to lunch. Of course I do, because she suggests my favorite local spot with the delicious pizza I spoke of in an earlier post...the pizza that's worth (in my mind) consuming the carbs and calories. So we go. We order pizza. I'm good, because I only eat one piece. I did drink a glass of wine before we ate, though. Strike 2 for Friday. That's when she tells me that my grandmother's house needs a new well and septic, and she doesn't know how much uncle #3 is asking for the house (there are 6 siblings in my mothers family, and the sale of the house is supposed to be split between them, and the house is in uncle #3's name so it's up to him). Then she says that if she still decides to buy grams house, she won't be able to get the work done on it until after her house sells, and "I'll have to rent a place or SOMETHING until the work on grams house gets finished"...if I even have enough money left after selling my house and buying hers......... Of course she doesn't come right out and ASK if she can move in with me, but that's what this has all been leading up to..... So Friday after David gets home from work, and mom has dropped me at home and left, I tell him that I've gotta get out of the house. I'm so cagey and panicky that I don't even know which end is up anymore. We go to a nice peaceful place that he likes to fish, and I sit with him and look at the water. Only this time, I say hey...stop at the liquor store on the way. I want to bring some wine. So he does. Mind you, Ms. Mania is still kicking my butt. I'm going on a slice of pizza to eat that day...that's it. I don't think I had even consumed 20 ounces of water yet that day. So it's extremely windy, to the point that we end up having to leave after about 90 minutes. I get the brilliant idea to go up to Lake George and take one of those scenic cruises. Only that's not in the budget, but Ms. Mania says who cares, right?? So the scenic cruise turns into a dinner cruise, with more wine. After the cruise turned into going into a lakeside bar, more wine, and FRIED PUB FOOD. I know this was a horrible, mania induced bender. It has not been this bad since I was in my early 20's, when Ms. Mania was the prevalent mood...unlike now, when it's usually crippling depression. Ive gotta say, my friends, I'm on the edge. I just can't handle this anymore. I don't know how to stop self destructing. My weight is stable, but for how much longer? And when they say alcohol hits you much harder and faster than pre WLS, it's NO JOKE. I'm lucky I didn't end up in the ER getting my stomach pumped. I've had wine several times since surgery, but never that amount. The only thing I'm looking for out of this post is getting this off my chest. I don't expect, nor am I looking for, any sympathy. I know that I need to see my doc and get an increase of my Lamictal, and need to see my therapist more. But right at this moment, I'm completely lost.
  3. Nana Trish

    Hemorrhoids , ugh

    Oh and just a PS, @tracyringo...you should reconsider the colonoscopy (unless you had one recently, like pre op WLS or something like that). I had one done last September...only 4 months post op, and I had no trouble getting the prep down. My previous one was done in January of 2016, as part of my WLS clearance, but they wanted to repeat it after divertic. I was knocked out both times, and didn't feel a thing. Looking out for you❤️
  4. Nana Trish

    Hemorrhoids , ugh

    I had to do liquids for 3 weeks last summer after my hospitalization for diverticulitis, and I pretty much did protein shakes, yogurt, SF jello and ice pops, and LOTS of broth (with unjury protein powder) and water. You will need to give your body (by that, I mean your butt gotta add a little humor, right?) time to recouperate, and the liquids will definitely help. Try to hang in there, girl. They will fix you up! Praying for you ❤️
  5. Nana Trish

    Hemorrhoids , ugh

    Oh @tracyringo...I feel your pain, literally!! I have had trouble with hemorrhoids for years. Long before WLS...I have diverticulitis to blame for mine. I haven’t needed surgery yet, but they are bad. Mine bleed on a regular basis. The high protein, low carb diet is bad for them. But we can’t change that part of it. I’m praying for you, my friend!! My surgeon said it’s safe for me to take 5 colace tablets a day, and I have been. It helps a lot because I don’t have to strain to go. Hang in there...good luck with surgery! ❤️❤️❤️
  6. Nana Trish

    What should I do at noon today?

    I think it’s a very personal decision. I was supposed to have my WLS in March of 2016, but I had to postpone it because I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer, and needed to treat that first. Before my first surgery date, I told everyone that I was having WLS. About 90% of the reactions I received were very negative...anywhere from being told that I was taking the easy way out, to being told that if I just eat less and exercise I can lose the weight on my own, to telling me I was going to destroy my body just to lose “a few pounds”...a few? 187 is a little more than a few. Anyway, fast forward 14 months. I had my WLS, and the only people I told this time around prior to surgery were my hubby, my kids, and 2 friends that I completely trust. I haven’t even told my mother or sister. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure they have figured it out, and my mother has even asked me several times. I flat out lied. I don’t lie...except about this. I’m the type of person that needs 100% focus to do something important, especially of this magnitude, and the negative behaviors would have derailed me, without a doubt. But I’ve also had several people I don’t know ask about it if they’ve overheard me talking about my surgeon or my weight loss, and I will talk to them about it very openly. One of the receptionists at my dentist’s office asked if I’d had surgery after hearing how much weight I’d lost, and I absolutely told her I did. We had a 20 minute discussion about it, during which she asked me a lot of questions about the procedure, how I was feeling during and after the weight loss, how I liked my surgeon, asked about getting my diabetes into remission, etc. She was scheduled to go to the seminar, with my surgeon, the following day...and she was nervous. So I answered all of her questions, tried to put her mind at ease, and I told her about this wonderful forum I am always more than happy to talk about it with anyone considering having WLS, but as far as telling anyone in my “circle”, it’s not going to happen. I needed to do this for me, and I need to continue to put my needs first where my weight loss is concerned, so I won’t do that to myself. And like others have said, I’m really hoping that someday my weight loss won’t be the hot topic anymore, and I can just be me. One thing I believe, though, is that keeping your medical issues (including WLS) private, is not being dishonest. I know lying is dishonest, but this in my opinion is different. Just my 2 cents. I hope things went well for you, no matter what you decided to do!
  7. Nana Trish

    ONDERLAND are you kidding me?

    It’s certainly a wild ride!! Never boring, no doubt, lol
  8. Nana Trish

    VSG

    Sending prayers and best wishes that your surgery went well and you’re doing ok right now!!! Thinking of you ❤️❤️❤️
  9. Nana Trish

    ONDERLAND are you kidding me?

    Yes, yes!! Can’t wait to see you in the cafe, @tracyringo!!
  10. Nana Trish

    CJ, I'm CindyLouWho and I'm overweight now too!!!!

    That is so awesome, @Cindy Lou Who!!! I remember exactly what it felt like to hit that overweight category...I think I was almost as happy then as I was when I reached a normal BMI!! Congrats...and I’m so happy for you!! ❤️
  11. Nana Trish

    ONDERLAND are you kidding me?

    TRACY!!!!! WooHOO!!! Congrats! I’m so proud of you and very very happy for you!! Welcome to onederland, my friend
  12. Nana Trish

    Feeling weird and scared - Why?

    Wow, @Cindy Lou Who...I could have written this myself! To me, most of this process has been scary. It seems more scary now that I’m at goal weight (a little below, actually) than it was even a few weeks ago. It’s scary getting used to living in a body that doesn’t feel like mine anymore. First of all, 70 pounds down is fantastic, and a huge accomplishment!! Congrats!!! Think about what you wrote for a minute...you just got back from a vacation, that you have been PUTTING OFF FOR 4 YEARS!!! You wore a bathing suit, AND it’s not hard to walk 3-4 miles anymore? Those are all huge milestones! But you’re right, it’s ALL scary. And great. And everything in between!! If you stick to your plan, this will not be another yo~yo. You won’t magically gain weight as soon as you hit your goal, unless you completely abandon your plan the minute you get there. The way you have eaten to lose those 70 pounds is the way you will continue to eat at goal, and beyond. The whole set point thing...I have found mine to be around 150, but I think that’s partly because I’ve tried to stop the weight loss myself, and I think my body is very comfortable here. I didn’t know that, though, until I got here. It might be a while before you know what yours is. Your goal weight...that’s a pretty personal thing. I chose my first goal (listed on my profile) because that was the last weight I felt comfortable at, and also because I felt it was achievable. I didn’t want to set it too low, not be able to hit that number, and lose all faith in the process (even though a goal weight of 175 still would have put me at a 161 pound loss!! Nothing to sneeze at!) After that, I reset it to 160. That was still a tiny bit above healthy BMI, but the number sounded right for me. I’m at 147 now, but this is as low as I want to go. 150 is a great place to be, lol. I highly doubt you are stretching your sleeve, but I think most of us have worried about that at some point during this process. I don’t think you need to worry about eating with baby utensils anymore, lol. But I personally still weigh everything I eat, unless I’m away from home for a meal. I’m 13 months out, and I think I will probably always weigh my food. If you think you are eating too much though, going back to weighing/measuring is a good idea. As far as feeling full after a meal, I think sleeve and bypass are different in that aspect. If I eat until I feel physically full, I pay dearly for a couple of hours after the meal. Bypassers are supposed to drop the fork the minute we feel any restriction, and 95% of the time, I do. The 5% of the time, when I DON’T, is the reason I know how sick it makes me. I generally get that “full” feeling about 20 minutes after I stop eating...which is why we are supposed to take 20 minutes to eat the meal. The compulsion to binge eat...that’s a tough one for me. I was a huge emotional binge eater prior to surgery. Do I still get the urge to binge eat when I’m under stress or unhappy? I do. As with any addiction, you may still get cravings. I do. But I don’t engage in the activity anymore. A few of us had a discussion on the forum a while back about missing how we used to stuff ourselves to the point of being so full we were almost sick. There are days that I still miss that feeling. How twisted is it that there are days that I’d still like to feel that feeling?? After EVERYTHING I’ve just gone through to get where I am? Just the fact that you no longer binge is a sign that you’re on the right track. I don’t know if we ever really get rid of the want to eat our emotions...it’s what you do with that “want” that counts. Instead of eating, go for a walk. Come here to vent. Find new activities or hobbies to take the place of eating your feelings. It’s all a process. In your own words, you said that the unhealthy foods just don’t give you the same pleasure anymore. If you feel like you want to binge, remember those words!! Finally, you’re not whining!! This is a support group, that’s what we are here for...to listen and support you!!! We have all felt these feelings at some point during this process, you are not alone in that at all!! Keep working on the negative feelings by talking to us, a therapist, or a family member or friend when things pop up. Positive self talk is also extremely important!! Remind yourself daily of how hard you are working, how far you’ve come, and how awesome you are!!
  13. Nana Trish

    Cheese pizza nearly killed me today.

    @tracyringo...idk how to post links, lol
  14. Nana Trish

    Cheese pizza nearly killed me today.

    You can get Medicare through certain health care plans, some with drug coverage included (which is what I have) with some companies. I think it depends on the state you live in. But my plan covers more than the 80% that medicare covers for most things, so that’s a huge financial help. You might see commercials on TV for Medicare managed health plans, and that is what they are talking about. I actually applied for mine through a medical concierge service through my doctors office. It’s a huge help! Google it, you might be able to get a great savings by switching plans! It’s still Medicare, only better.
  15. Nana Trish

    Cheese pizza nearly killed me today.

    Do you have straight Medicare? Or a managed plan? It’s very possible the guidelines have changed...I was just going by what the surgeon said. But he did say it’s ultimately up to the insurance company, so no guarantees. I have Today’s Options, so I’ll have to actually call them to know for sure.