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About Michael_A

  • Rank
    Senior Member
  • Birthday 09/21/1974

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Location
  • Interests
    I'm an IT guy, so gadgets and electronics to a certain extent. I play the piano. I'm raising 5 kids, ages 4 yo to 14 yo.
  • Age


  • Height (ft-in)
  • Start Weight
  • Current Weight
  • Goal Weight
  • Surgery Date
  • Surgery Type
    Gastric Bypass
  • Surgeon

Recent Profile Visitors

2,897 profile views
  1. Michael_A

    What should I do at noon today?

    This is the painful truth. Once it's out, you have no control over what someone else does with it, what light they share the information in, etc. 10000% agree.
  2. Michael_A

    5 weeks in and struggling

    Yes just for some comparison, I wasn't allowed to have any kind of meat until at least 3 months. The only thing I could have before that was scrambled egg and thin-sliced lean deli meat. The lunch meat never really sat well with me at all and I didn't try eating any more at all really until many more months down the road.
  3. Michael_A

    5 weeks in and struggling

    There's no rule that says you have to advance your foods on a schedule. You can definitely go back for a bit to things that were easier to tolerate. What kind of foods are you eating now, that you are calling soft foods?
  4. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

    Trish don't get me wrong, in almost every area of life, life is SO much better for me. I am so happy right now. I was just surprised to find that things like the tray table experience, and for you car seat belts, are a thing. And how deeply it was burned into me. But hey if that's the only area of my life that something like that exists, then I consider myself blessed :-)
  5. Just the general willingness to get out of my shell now and try things that are way out of my norm. Women complete strangers smile at me a lot now. That is a trip. LIFE just gets more fun because you can move around so much better.... the vehicle doesn't squash down to the curb when you get in it... you can take stairs a LOT easier- while carrying grocery sacks-- and a toddler.... you can walk into a strange place full of people, and you're just another human, instead of instantly being judged for being huge... it's fun because when you go to a restaurant with friends, you eat far less than all of them, and you feel so good about that... buying normal-dude clothes, right off a rack. It's fun but still surreal for me... I accept myself now. I hated the fat me and lived in a dark place for several years because of it. And yes sex IS better. My eating habits will never be the same and every day I'm a little happier about that.
  6. Michael_A

    I did it!!!!!!

    CJ, BIG congrats!!! This is a special kind of joy that many folks get to experience!!!!
  7. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

    Seriously, this is profound.
  8. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

  9. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

    Thanks Steph :-) I'm so much happier now than I was a few years ago, and truly enjoying life in a way that I haven't in probably 15 years. It was just so surprising that something like that could come from out of nowhere.
  10. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

    I just think some experiences are SO emotionally potent in the area of our brain that processes "awful", there is not much to relive the discomfort except maybe lots of years lol. I'll let you know in about 20 if my seatback tray emotions have improved.
  11. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

    I will have to try this, but I'm probably broken in some way by now... for REALS just thinking about that stupid tray table again while reading your responses just now.... dread and anxiety.
  12. Michael_A

    Advice from a 15 year by pass

    This has been really helpful to me as well... Plenty of times I want something that shouldn't be a normal part of diet, but I always tell myself "not right this second, I can eat it tomorrow or in two days" or something like that. So it's not like there is any kind of food that I can't have. Just a ton of things that I shouldn't be eating more than once or twice a week. So on Monday I might say"I really want these cookis, but I'm going to wait and have them on Weds". Sometimes I really look forward to it for those two days and Weds comes and they are tasty! But sometimes Weds comes and I no longer have the craving for them. So much of my overweight was caused by wanting something, and just going out and satisfying my desire for it.
  13. Michael_A

    Road Trip Food Advice

    I've been traveling a bit more lately and @Gretta's advice is close to my own. I keep a handful of Quest bars in my backpack and some small baggies of cashews and almonds. At restaurants I often order whichever salad gives me the best meat/protein options. Sometimes I ask for "extra chicken" or whatever if I know there won't be a lot there. Most restaurants will do just about anything if you ask nicely :-) Plenty of places I just order a side of two scrambled eggs with shredded cheese and side of salsa, or something like that.
  14. Michael_A

    The power of negative memories

    It was probably 8 years ago or so, that I was traveling from Alaska to Texas with two buddies for an IT conference. I was probably at or near my high weight of close to 300 lbs (I had hit that spot on the scale and then kind of stayed in the general vicinity for several years.) I must not have flown in a while. because at some point I tried to fold the tray table down, and my belly was so large that I couldn't even get it open. It just hit the top of my belly and stopped there, at like a 45 degree angle. I was mortified. I flew again within the next year and just experimentally played with the table and my gut easily intruded into the tray table's space by 5 or 6 inches. I was so embarrassed by this and never again used the tray table for ANYthing. And every time I flew after that, I was very conscious of how much space I was really consuming, just sitting there. Every time I got on a plane after that, the tray table stared at me the whole flight, an accuser of how wrong something was with me, and a constant reminder of shame and embarrassment. Fast forward to this week. I've been traveling a bit more for work lately. Since WLS I haven't dared touch a tray table. The memories of feelings about how embarrassed I was about being SO large, are SO baked into me, that I couldn't even fold the table down. And the feelings are STILL there!!!! So anyways, this older couple is setting next to me and strikes up a conversation. They are tourists heading to my hometown, and we got to talking. Eventually the guy asked me for locations about various things and I KNEW this was heading toward me drawing them a map. The craziest thing to me about this is, I'm serious for at least three or four minutes I kept mentally looking at my tray table, knowing it was going to have to come down so I could draw the map, and I was DREADING it!! I was already feeling that shame and embarrassment, and even though I knew in some part of my brain that surely I don't occupy nearly as much space anymore, the other part was already gearing up for the embarrassment I was going to fell when I lowered the tray table and I was too fat to do it, and the guy next to me would be watching it all and yeah, fat people problems. So finally the moment came, and the tray table came down. And even with my baggy hoodie on I still had plenty of room to spare between my stomach and the tray table. Like 4 inches! But I'm telling you, that moment was truly surreal, because on the one hand there was great relief and pleasure that HEY I CAN FOLD THIS THING DOWN ALL THE WAY, but at the exact same moment I was also feeling that dread and red-alert feeling of a situation that I should be avoiding at all costs! And even now, sitting here typing this 5 days later, I STILL have the same mixture of feelings when I think on that moment... relief and pleasure, mixed with the complete opposite- dread and embarrassment. Since getting to a goal weight, this is by far the oddest experience I've had. The brain truly is interesting.... that the power of a negative moment can permeate you SO deeply, that even when the conditions of that moment are completely reversed, it's still impossible for me to just be happy and thrilled and enjoy it.
  15. Michael_A

    Advice from a 15 year by pass

    I think you hit the nail on the head--- she IS following some rules, of some kind. Pre-measured portion dishes for the ice cream, etc. I suspect most people get in trouble not by relaxing how closely they follow a plan, but rather by letting the plan go by the wayside, period. I'm 6 months out this month and am still learning things, every day. Thanks so much for posting your experience and observations of your friend.