I"ve been online dating also. I wrote this article for a local magazine.....
After being on some internet dating sites for a few months I’ve learned a few things.
But first I started my journey looking for my other half in Nov 2012, after spending over 10 yrs by myself, and the realization of being alone the rest of my life could be a possibility. I do not want that for my life. I wanted to share what life I have with someone.
Seeing as I was not one to go to bars and social events of that caliber, I turn to internet dating sites, just to see what was out there. I’ve learn quite a few things.
Getting a message from a man that says “are you open minded?” Was really asking can I send you a picture of my erect penis. After 6 days of being on one particular site I had QUITE the collection of penis pictures…. And guys….MOST of you really should not be proud of what you have. Actually if I was 99% of those guys I would’ve been very embarrassed to send that picture to any woman because it was not as massive as the man thought it was. Wow. Also to send that kind of a picture to a woman shows a few things about yourself. YOU HAVE NO RESPECT. Not on ounce of respect for women, and with that you need to maybe reconsider trying to find your mate in this fashion. Until you can show respect for a woman, you shouldn’t even try. Also you obviously have no respect for yourself, to be sending pictures like that out. Word of advice to both Women and Men, HAVE RESPECT FOR YOURSELF.
People lie through their teeth! From talking to the men I would meet, the women are just as bad as the men in this fashion! So they lie in order to meet you in person thinking that their charm and looks will capture your heart. Ummm. ……Not how it works people. You can’t start a real relationship when you start it off first thing ..with a lie. Relationships are built on trust and respect, if you lie in order to meet someone, you still don’t have a clue how things work.
Men hate those sites, they want to text. The second message you get is a guy saying here’s my number, text me. Don’t be afraid to tell them you’re more comfortable using the site for a little bit longer. My answer to them is "No sorry I'm not so quick to give out my number, if you don't talk through here, then we don't talk, won't hurt my feelings" A lot of guys will delete you or block you. They obviously were not worth your effort. I've found that most of those guys want to text you so they can keep track of you during the day. It's a CONTROL issue. Make sure they still have you on the hook. They get nervous when you don’t text back and will start sending texts and messages through the site again asking where you are, what are you doing, why didn’t answer the text? Really? Dude we are NOT married. We haven’t met yet and hardly know each other, I have no ties to you. I hate texting anyway.....Now if you want to CALL me and talk to me, actual TALK, that is the best way to get to know someone if you really and honestly want to.
WOMEN ARE STUPID! Yes, I am a women, yes I did say that, Please ladies stop giving the rest of us sane women out there BAD REPS!!!! The scammers out there are off the hook. I got NUMEROUS messages from people who spoke a strange language. It was English but it was broken English, verbs were wrong, the flow of conversation was strange. They spoke of love and connections and sweet talk about how wonderful you were as a woman (ok, you haven’t even met me how would you know). They just laid the compliments on THICK. Long paragraphs where most men just write one liners. They prey until one woman falls for it! The woman then 'falls in love' online without ever speaking to the man. Then expect that person to love them back. DUH!!!!!!!! I started responding to these scames just to investigate more and see what the guy was thinking or leading to. Then they would message you a few times and then tell you how they feel this strong pull to you. Then 2 messages later are asking you to send them money, or come visit them, or email their command post (as they are deployed and in the military) and register at their fiancé to gain SOMETHING from that. Ok SCAMMERS get a life. And to those women that fall for that… open your eyes! Be conscious of the fact there are very bad bad people out there. Don’t fall for that stuff. Use the brain and common sense that was given to you.
There are good men and good women out there. You have to just weed through the bad ones first. Don't fall for scams, don't fall for stalkers. Just be aware of what information your putting out there. I have met several men that have become friends and we enjoy hanging out, but we know we will never be anything else but friends. I have dated a few that were very honest and nice, but it just wasn't 'it' for us.
THIS ALSO WORKS BOTH WAYS. There are sneaky women out there that just want to take adavantage of the men as well, they are deemed as gold diggers, and hookers, and they are out there, Men BEWARE of those women!!!! So it's just not on one side, there are two sides to every story.
In closing, I’m sure there is still more to learn, and now this search has actually turned into a investigation in the world of internet dating, more than searching for that partner! This new investigating has definitely kept me occupied in this nasty winter we are having.