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I just had to do this separately. I was looking for a new picture of me to put up, which involved me looking at old pictures of me, and I just saw how I wasn't really smiling in many pictures. Even after I hit goal, I just have this look like I'm half smiling or I'm tired or I'm just sad. And then I look at pictures since I separated from my ex and moved into my new place. I have grieved, it's been horrible at times of course, it has been incredibly difficult. I'm not going to pretend that I'm some odd person who doesn't grieve when a relationship ends even when it needs to end. But damn, when I smile now, it's a huge smile. It's real, and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted. I really do. 


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