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Ramblings of a slow loser.

babykinz53

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I am a slow loser....

 

  At first it depressed me, it aggravated me, and had me wanting to give up. Its my way, its the way Ive done this journey for the past 3 decades.   I am good at losing weight, but when it stops I give up.

 

  Now here I am, I haven't lost any weight since June.   I only lost 50 pounds since surgery......it pisses me off.  

 

 Now I can say, I have not been perfect, but I can count the number of times I have eaten off plan on one hand, I can remember each time in the past year vividly because the pain it has caused.

 

  I do not eat bread, pasta, starches and very limited sugar. By that I mean I will have a life saver now and again and my vitamins do have sugar in them.

 I go to the gym three times a week and do the machines, I can see the results, especially in my shoulders and arms. This last summer I wore tank tops for the first time in a couple decades.

 

 I have this love hate relationship with this forum.  I love reading about people who have lost weight, but it really makes me angry as well. People who have started at a higher weight than I did and have twice as much in half the time. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! but yeah them!

 

  But here I am, a little over a year since surgery and I am stuck at 160 pounds, on my 5'2 frame. My goal was 130, but I am stuck at 160. STUCK! 

 

  I've tried everything, I've upped my calories, I've lowered my calories, I've upped my carbs and lowered my carbs. I even tried going into ketosis by stop taking my vitamins. 

 

   I am averaging about 1200 calories a day....which leads me to my other thing.

 

  For about a month now, I have been constantly hungry....yeah I know, the end of the year honeymoon period thing.  But  OMG, the constant hunger. I know its not a vitamin deficiency(which was my first thought) because I had my blood panel and I am in the standard range for everything except b-12 which I was WAY high on because I was taking too high a dose.

 

  So I graze, mostly at night. So to compensate I eat smaller meals, really just a few ounces of protein, thats what I eat, in one form or another, protein. Veggies are like a luxury to me because in order to get my 80+ grams of protein in I stick to protein snacks, lefts overs, eggs, cheese and nuts.

 

  But yeah, I'm stuck...160.....but ya know what....I dont care!    I look at before and after pics of myself and I am proud, and for the first time since 1985 I can look at pictures of myself and not cringe.  I went from 3x to L-XL.   I can wear cute clothes, I can wear a PDF when I kayak. 

 

  I am not giving up.........Yes its been a LONG stall, but I am not giving up. Just 30 pounds to go.....I will get there. It might take me another whole year, but I WILL GET THERE.  Because regaining the weight I have lost in not an option. Its just not!

 

  All I have to do is look at my before pictures to know, regaining is not an option.

 

  Here I am rambling....but this forum is my ONLY support. No one knows about my surgery....maybe that's why my slow weight loss is a good thing. If I did lose 100 pounds in 6 months it would be obvious, but since I am struggling and losing slowly, I am just like everyone else on a diet.

 

 

 Crazy ramble is over......

 

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You look fantastic! Active, happy, healthy, comfortable in your own skin. I'm sorry to hear you're feeling down because you're losing slowly - that's a tough road to walk down, but I like that you are determined to get to your goal weight. It sounds like you're doing what you should be doing: low carb eating and being active, including going to the gym. It's the healthy habits that will get you to your goal, even if it doesn't happen on a timeframe you're pleased about. 

I'm honestly getting worried about the end of my honeymoon, which should be coming up shortly. I've been coasting along on very few calories because I'm not hungry, but the idea of being frequently hungry freaks me out a bit. I'm hoping that keto will help out with that, but no guarantees, right? 

Just out of curiosity, do you follow the "Pouch Rules for Dummies?" If so, do you find them helpful? Any other insights from someone who's a year+ out from surgery to those of us who are following behind you? 

I understand what you mean about it being hard to watch people on the forum who are losing a lot faster than you. I'm very lucky in that I'm losing fast right now, but if I wasn't me, I'd hate me a little for that <_< Just after surgery, I spent the first couple of months agonizing about how everyone but me was losing really fast, and it felt awful, like I was doing something wrong or my body just wouldn't cooperate with me or something. I also know from that experience how very hollow the advice to not compare yourself to others can feel when that's all you can think about. 

Maybe @tmcgee's very very very long stall can serve as an inspiration for you :) 

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I am so happy you posted this! This forum needs the balance. Just the other day, I was thinking I might need to take a little break from this place because I was having a jealous pity party moment. I searched here using the key words "slow loser" and "jealous". Ha ha. Then I got mad because so many of the people who considered themselves slow losers had rates of loss I totally envied. Not my best night. Like you, I really am excited for the fast losers and their many happy posts about losing 100 pounds overnight and getting out of the 200s in 5 minutes ;). But I NEED posts like yours.

Your frustration really comes through. But, when I got to your pictures, I thought, "Dang, that really does look like an after picture". By that I mean you look normal, healthy, and happy. I totally see you as a success story. You're going sleeveless, girl, I'm totally tickled about that! If the sugar in your vitamins is nagging at you and kicking you out of ketosis, switch vitamins. You're working too hard to be cheated out of the weight-loss and hunger-curbing benefits of ketosis. So glad to hear you're in the gym. Gym bodies just look and feel so good. Again, so glad you posted this!

 

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Your before and after pics are amazing.  You gained muscle and lost the fat.. Congrats !!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  @Jen581791 You keep your calories around 700 to 800                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          @Gretta being a slow loser stinks but on the flip side I still have all my hair and hoping the skin wont be as saggy !

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7 hours ago, Jen581791 said:

"Pouch Rules for Dummies?"

SO I Googled this and it seems I have been doing this all wrong!  

 

Quote

The patient must time meals five hours apart or the patient will get too hungry in between.

WOW!  5 hours apart? 

 

Quote

The ideal meal is one that is made up of the following: ½ of your meal to be low fat protein, ¼ of your meal low starch vegetables and ¼ of your meal solid fruits. This type of meal will stay in your pouch a long time and is good for your health.

I stay away from fruit completely and rarely eat veggies.....gotta change that!

 

 But that Google search led to many more and I have learned some stuff I will try.

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3 hours ago, babykinz53 said:

SO I Googled this and it seems I have been doing this all wrong!  

It's based on the findings of the guy who invented the RNY (back before the sleeve was a thing), and his experience with his patients. It's certainly worth a try - I'm just getting towards the point in my journey where it's relevant, apparently. It doesn't sound low carb enough to be keto, but if that's not working at the moment... 

I hope you can drop those last pounds, but regardless you've already lost an amount that has brought the benefits of health improvements and lifestyle improvements that are so important :wub:

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@babykinz53

totally get this. 

- You look great. - Lipids profile are a dream. Wow. I think you are a big success.

Sometimes stalls are due to body thinking it is in a desert or a famine --- more fluids or a few more calories convinces the body that it is not longer in a drought or famine and it's okay to lose a little bit. I find if I up by exercise a little bit and my calories a little bit that may restart the loss process. Though I'm a sleever there is a lot in the Pouch Rules relevant to me. I eat a ton of fiber, and find fruit quenches my appetite in a way that empty carbos (pasta, pizza, rice, etc) does not. Having said that... we each have to find what works for us. Good luck and sure you will continue to be in a good place. 

 

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On 10/31/2017 at 2:58 PM, BurgundyBoy said:

@babykinz53

How are you doing? 

Doing okay, I have decided to stop stressing about losing weight and just be happy where I am, for now.   I still need to work on a cardio routine, its just something I cant conjure up the motivation for. 

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1 hour ago, babykinz53 said:

Doing okay, I have decided to stop stressing about losing weight and just be happy where I am, for now.   I still need to work on a cardio routine, its just something I cant conjure up the motivation for. 

I get it! Stressing is so yesterday.... be well!

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Hi:  I highlighted a paragraph from your post "  So I graze, mostly at night. So to compensate I eat smaller meals, really just a few ounces of protein, thats what I eat, in one form or another, protein. Veggies are like a luxury to me because in order to get my 80+ grams of protein in I stick to protein snacks, lefts overs, eggs, cheese and nuts."

Grazing at night- it is the only thing I see that could be holding your weight loss back.  Plus you are building a stronger body at the gym replacing fat with muscle and looking better.  These are the most important to concentrate on.  I am 3.5 years out and have lost 76 lbs, gained back 14 and lost them again.  My key to keeping the weight off is learning I needed to excercise and at night I drink protein drinks for dinner especially after working out.  Less calories at night helps.    I just joined this forum for support, I am at 188 lbs after 3.5 years, but did just lose 14, by watching protein, water and snacks and began excercising.  I would like to get to 170 and then have skin removal surgery.  So I am working on losing 18 more lbs.  Each day is a new beginning for us with this wonderful tool we have been given.  Enjoy it, embrace it and continue to try.  When the time comes you will know what to do to get additional weight off.  

Good luck.

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