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My vomiting hasn't ceased, both effortless/involuntary rumination and episodes so violent I nearly pass out. Eating is a painful chore.  I've been taken back to a liquid diet and am scheduled for an EGD on Monday.  I'm no longer afraid of tube feeding. At this point I may welcome it. Just holding out hope for things to get easier. After years of complications, I'm a little disappointed this surgery hasn't alleviated my symptoms. At least I've lost 25 pounds since. That's something to hold on to.




Saw the colorectal surgeon today. Apparently I have issues well beyond a mere hemmeroid (which explains the OMG I WANT TO DIE pain). I'm back on serious pain killers, a cocktail of other medications and he's looking to schedule me for a surgical procedure next week. I feel slight relief since taking the medication. Bless physicians who actually care for their patients quality of life. 

While I was there, I inadvertently talked a nurse out of having the VSG after discussing my medical history. I tried to reassure her that my complications were rare, that my initial surgeon wasn't great, and that even though it's caused me lifelong issues, it still bettered my life in so many other ways. She said she was on the fence about it, but that my experience basically "sealed," it for her. I hope she reconsiders her stance. Anyone who could benefit from these surgeries shouldn't let fear prevent them from seeking out treatment. 

I'm also starting a new medication for the spasms as they have become unmanagable and they're occuring every day. Tomorrow I'm supposed to start going into the AIC center for daily transfusions as I can't maintain hydration due to the spasms/vomiting. 

It also appears that 2-3 weeks from now I'll be going back in for surgery to remove the tumor they caught on the CT scan. It grew over a centimeter in a 2 week span. I am terrified of possibly losing the organ it's attached to. I can't psychologically cope with the idea. 

I am honestly exhausted from all of the pain, and now the fear of the upcoming surgery. Any time I have to go outside I inevitably cry in public due to a spasm or rectal pain, and at worst I've screamed from it. I loathe to make a scene, but it's uncontrollable. It's a humiliating experience.

I'm trying to remain positive.


Not very happy

No one tells you about hemmeroids  and how God awfully painful  they can be after these surgeries!  I was in so much pain that I'm thinking it triggered my spasms and subsequent vomiting/dehydration so I was hospitalized again yesterday.  The pain was so extreme that even on an IV of dilauded I still sobbed from the pain of it all. 

 My family had to leave today and frankly I am a bit terrified about whether not I'll be able to take care of myself. Even on new medication the spasms aren't  completely going away and I find that I make myself sick if I try to do simple things like clean my kitchen or run a vacuum. 

 I'm just going to have to wait and see what happens .


Day 4 - slight relief

I endured 6 days of a gurgling gut and stabbing gas pains before that magical chalky miracle milk of magnesia finally relieved me of my intestinal torture. 10/10 would recommend post surgery.

I've been careful to follow my new medication plan hoping we'll prevent spasms like I had yesterday from returning - at least in the early stages of recovery. Staying hydrated is so touch and go by default (and frankly, I'm struggling to stay on top of it), but if the spasms return I consequently will have to also return to the hospital for IV hydration. Though I felt slight pangs today, I was spared the jack hammer level of severity they otherwise typically progress into.

I've continued taking my prescribed pain medication, but even when waking (and thus not having had any pain management through the night), the pain barely registers. I'm still slow in movement but I can manage normal grooming/household/etc activities without physical limitation. 

I'm gobsmacked at how much better I feel after this surgery compared to my prior WLS. The experience literally is night and day.

Now I'm waiting for the day when the scale starts to slide back and my body begins to shrink. It will be amazing.


ER visit

Ended up in the emergency room tonight after uncontrollable vomiting, subsequent dehydration (my face actually started peeling), and horrifically intense esophageal spasms.

Thankfully the surgeon on call was part of the team that operated on me so they were able to determine what was wrong fairly quickly. Now I'm on an additional regiment of medication.

There was no guarantee that this surgery would alleviate any of my symptoms, but experiencing this level of pain and complication so early into the recovery is very disheartening.



After finally finding competent specialists it was determined that my VSG back in 2014 was botched beyond what we initially understood:  leaving me vomiting 30+ daily, ultimately resulting in a partially paralyzed esophagus, rumination syndrome, and a myriad of other issues including having to be fed via nasal gastric tubes- an experience I wouldn't wish on anyone.

Monday (9/25/17) I had a revision to a gastric bypass at Mayo Clinic as part of a treatment plan to hopefully manage these conditions and provide me some relief. They were able to convince my insurance in less than a day without having to appeal through any denial. The ease and pace that they took to treat me has been nothing less than shocking.

 My recovery has been miraculous compared to the past surgery. Not only am I able to lay down and sit up without aid, I walked over a mile in laps around the hospital after being moved from recovery. The pain is manageable, the experience I had at Mayo with Dr Elli compared to my surgery with Dr Foote cannot be compared. I'm able to feed myself, and I have so much energy I have to remind myself not to push it as I have undergone an even more serious surgery than the VSG.

While they did not perform this surgery for obesity, I do have the benefit of looking forward to another bout of weight loss given that while I lost 150 pounds from the VSG, I am still no where near my goal weight.

If this provides the relief I desperately need, I have nothing but hope for the future.


Almost a month woes

I saw my GP for the infections and everything is under control. But since I've also come down with gastroenteritis and the constant vomiting less than a month post op is really taxing my tolerance for pain and general stress. My weight loss has slowed down, even while I vomit everything I eat so I can't say I appreciate the double slap that it feels like.

I'm ready for all the obstacles and issues to pass by me now so that I can hopefully look forward to further weight loss and an enjoyable life, because it's been anything but since surgery.



Even though I really shouldn't complain, given that I've lost a fair amount of weight so far, I really miss being able to eat without feeling like I'm being disemboweled.



I called the surgeon's office first thing in the morning, emailed in the photo's and spent nearly 2 hours collectively on hold waiting for them to tell me what to do concerning the infection.

Apparently a post operative infection doesn't register highly enough as a priority to simply give a call back, because their office is now closed and here I sit nursing the same wound.

I'm livid.


Infection + Pain

It's been 17 days since surgery. I slowly started to feel more energy, less pain, and more hope after an emotional crash when I felt I had too little restriction in my sleeve. Yet the past two days I've felt progressively worse, unsure of the cause and my inability to eat without excessive pain that had previously been far less severe.

Then, a couple of hours ago, this appeared on my stomach.



I made the mistake of squeezing out the puss, but it continues to weep no matter how I try to clean it. I'm prone to excessive worry, and now that I'm associating every recent pain with this infection, I'm too upset to sleep. I hope my GP can see me tomorrow, because the sudden onset of this (I was given the a-ok for these wounds on the 9th), on top of the visible depth of the wound is alarming.

I'm afraid to imagine how far it will progress through the night hours until the office opens.


As of today I'm able to meet all of my nutritional requirements and beyond without issue and I'm terrified that maybe my stomach wasn't made small enough. All I can think is that I'm going to fail this now because I didn't get the duodenal switch and I break down and sob. I'm convinced I just wasted 20k for a surgery that isn't going to benefit me because I can still fit food inside it and because I can't associate weight loss with anything but pain and starvation. I feel like my stomach was left too large and honestly feel hopeless. I thought I was going to have this spectacular future and I can't see it. All I can see is regret and disappointment for my whole family. I feel so, so, awful. I was supposed to feel no hunger, to have a limited space to fit food. I am so disappointed.



Had a couple of scares today , swooning from lack of energy and Charlie horses I'm assuming are from a combination of a lack of vitamins and water. Later in the day it took a turn and I was finally able to eat a satisfying meal (daal with protein powder), and even light halwa. Was feeling like I might lose my mind over the food options I had available to me, but being able to tolerate some of my healhtier "normal" foods that are appropriate to my diet have really uplifted my mood.

I'm not sure why my doctors office stressed no straws, but I've found it super beneficial to getting in my water today.

I'm looking forward to Friday when I might find out I'm able to graduate to all soft/soft chew foods because my tolerance has really risen.


Day 6

Today is a day of leaps and bounds. I managed to recline nearly flat on the couch (meaning tonight I can finally sleep in my own bed!). The family ate Chinese so I grabbed a cup of egg drop soup, dropped in unflavored protein powder and mixed it until it was nearly the consistency of water. It was such a nice change from the foods I've been trying to live on that I had purchased from my physician (some of it is fabulous, but none of the liquids are a hit for me). It may not be the best choice in nutrition, but at least I'm managing to get in my protein with this, as I keep failing otherwise.

My hand is still a little swollen: the soreness radiates down my fingers and up into my wrist, but it's much less noticeable than before. Water continues to give me intense stomach pains, but I'm managing to stay hydrated.

In all, I'm finally feeling like maybe this wasn't the worst idea in the world, after days of questioning my own sanity and will to survive through the intense pains I was suffering.


Day 5

There are still spots of blood in my urine but I'm feeling remarkably better. I can shuffle around almost as quickly as I could pre-surgery, and my ability to recline backward keeps getting better. I'm still struggling heavily with getting my required fluids/proteins in, but jello and popsicles have been a godsend. I've been dissolving gas x strips when the time allows and I'm looking forward to when all of this excess gas has worked its way out of my body.

I've been told it's not unusual to not have any BM's for several days after, so I'm really holding out that by Monday I'll be able to see a fully fucntioning digestive system. I've also lose 6 pounds since my surgery, but the idea of shedding weight quickly (or quickly in consideration of how long it takes without surgery), hasn't really registered with me. I can't imagine being thin enough to fit into certain clothes, or to be able to walk around without the burden of horrendous back pain, but then I look at my face and see that I am definitely losing weight.


Day 4

Day 4 post op. I spent the night heaving and trying not go vomit. The hand they used to push the IV is swollen and there's blood in my urine. I feel the gas pains might be less but they're still fairly intolerable and my whole face feels aflame but I don't register with a temperature. I'm having a lot of difficulty keeping down liquids (I manage to sit up straight to take them but even gravity doesn't help enough). I hope this passes quickly because I am absolutely miserable and I'm growing increasingly worried about having to go to back to the hospital.