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When did you tell your job?

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I don't have a surgery date, yet, my appt with the nurse practitioner is coming up, but I'm hoping to have it early next year (I'm projecting maybe February?). In any case, I'm wondering when you guys let your jobs know that surgery was a possibility. It looks like I'm going to have to tell them about the surgery, because I'll have to use sick time and/or disability (they made me take vacation this year that would have rolled over to next year). So anyway, I don't want to wait until the last minute and spring it on them, but I'm really dreading telling my boss, and I'm not really sure why. Maybe because it's something so personal for me. Does anyone have any insight into this? Any thoughts are appreciated.

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I told nobody at work. About 2 weeks before I told a few people that I was going to get my appendix out. Had already started my protein shakes and told them I had started a diet. Took 4 weeks off of work on medical, came back and nobody said anything. They still see me drinking the protein shakes and think I'm still on my diet. So far, so good.

Readytotransform likes this

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I told work right away that I was considering it. I have kept them posted through the whole process. My surgery date is October 3. I actually have told everyone I feel I have nothing to hide.

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I'm in the same position - surgery in March time frame. I've decided to talk with my boss about 60 days out (maybe earlier) so that he has time to prepare. The issue is that my hospital can't give me a date certain until the insurance approvals, which will not come until March. My plan is to not tell my immediate supervisors the reason I will be on medical leave. Instead, they will just know I'm having medically necessary surgery (recommended by my doctor). If they figure it out when I come back, then so be it. There are others in the office that know. In the US, for FMLA leave, you usually need to give your employer 30 days notice if you have a reasonable date certain but do check your company policy because they may require more notice in certain circumstances.

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I told my immediate boss(es) and human resources once I was certain that I was going to have the surgery because I wanted to make sure that I was scheduling it during the best possible time period (knowing that I wouldn't have an exact date until much later in the process). I also wanted any appointments that involved me taking time off of work prior to the surgery to be covered by FMLA.

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I waited until I had an actual date. All you have to say is that you need time off for a medical procedure. I don't believe they are even allowed to ask you what procedure. You can tell them you plan on taking 2 weeks (or whatever) but that you may to extend that depending on how things go.

Personally, I told everyone I work with directly as my being gone impacts their work load and I have a good relationship with them all. It was nice. Everyone was super supportive and helped out even when I did come back.

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Thanks for the advice, guys. I have my appt with the surgeon on Jan. 10, and a tentative surgery month of February. I think I've decided that I'm going to tell my supervisor in our next one-on-one, only because the surgeon appt falls in a technical "no time off zone," (I work at a payroll company), and because I think it's time. I probably won't tell my coworkers unless they ask, but I'm not going to lie either.

The bigger issue was what I'm going to tell all my clients. I have about 275 clients I talk to on a regular basis, and I have a very personal relationship with some of them. That being said, I don't think I really want them to know I'm having WLS. *sigh*

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I guess everyone is different but I feel like if there is going to be a negative reaction from someone then I am glad I found that out before I invested any more time in our relationship.

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I never had a problem telling anyone at work what I was doing. I'm a fairly open book anyway. I let me boss know that it was coming up and they were all very supportive. He helped me make sure I had everything in order for my short term disability so I would be ready to "focus on healing" after my surgery. I will say that since my surgery I am grateful that my coworkers know. I work in a sales job and I now have to take extra breaks to get my water in and to sip a protein shake here and there. Getting the nutrition in is a full time job on top of my actual job so it is nice that they are aware that I have to take care of myself and they know why. There was another girl who had the surgery at my work and at first decided not to tell anyone, but in the long run it came out and was no big deal. You will want the support. I would just let people know. Its an exciting change and a HARD change. Certainly not the easy way out that some people think.

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I have decided not to tell anyone (other than my wife) about the specific surgery. At work I have set slip that I have been having stomach issues for some time and that I need to go in and get it fixed. I also mentioned that while I'm heaing, I will be on a very special diet...liquid at first, etc. I threw in that I was really hoping it will be an opportunity to lose some weight through the process and, it wouldn't it be great to use this event to make some long-term behavior changes.

I really don't have a problem with the "deception" as 1) it's not far off the truth and 2) I know myself and I wouldn't be nearly as polite as some of the other forum members who have received the harsh and negative comments and opposition to surgery from friends and family. In most cases, those "know-it-alls" haven't walked in our shoes and they certainly haven't put in the hours and hours of research and discovery. I know there are many who would understand and be supportive and I don't mean to deceive anyone. I'm a week away so I guess I will soon see if I've handled this properly...

As I mentioned in a related thread - this is just the beginning. What happens when the weight comes off and the other negative comments come? I've read many posts from people facing some very insensitive reactions to their weight loss. Are you sick? Do you have cancer? Do you have HIV? Why, etc, etc. I guess we just have to hope for the best in people.

Good luck with your decision.

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well everyone knows at my work and our customers too haha.Just couldn't stop talking about it..so happy I was and am.Is fun to hear that the customers are bugging my co-workers now with questions about how things are with me.they are all extremely happy for me cos they all saw me gain and loose weight so many times.And as soon as i knew my date i just told my boss i would be home for at least 6 weeks and thats that.No discussion..

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I did as soon as I had a date as I work with a very small amt of staff and I knew they would want to hire a temp replacement, guess you have to do what is best for you when you want or if you want to tell anyone.

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I told work I was going to need a few weeks off for medical reasons once I knew I was really going to do it (found surgeon I wanted to use.. got health insurance OK).. Most people only know that I am taking a medical leave for surgery (no details of what). I told a few people at work that I am closer with what I'm actually having done. I'll still be at work for the first week of my pre-op diet and I guess some people will notice.. I intend to tell them I need to be on a liquid diet to prepare for surgery but no more.

Not sure what, if anything, I'll say when I get back.. Realistically I hope it becomes quite obvious what surgery I had pretty quickly..

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I told no one at work.  All I said is that I am taking 6 days off for holiday.  No explanation.  (nn)

Edited by nsquared

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I own my own business and I told my clients since I work remotely from home and I didn't want any of them to get ticked that they couldn't reach me since my phone didn't work in Mexico for the 3 days I was there.  But I was working within 3 hours of surgery and right up to the time I went in.  Had my laptop and they all knew I was working since I was answering emails.  I will tell anyone that asks how I lost the weight.  Why lie? 

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I waited until the insurance approved me before saying anything.  Once I was approved and started working towards getting a surgery date I had a sit-down meeting with my boss.  Most people at work in my department know and they're all very supportive.  We're a pretty close-knit group and they're going to have to cover for me when I'm off for surgery, so I didn't have any problems telling them.  Giving your work advance notice so you can plan your time off is always a good thing, but telling co-workers is a personal choice.  Don't feel obligated to do so if you don't want to.

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I work in a hospital kitchen, mostly women and gossips at that. So rather than it become a topic of false gossip, I told people. I had those who tried to discourage me, tell me that I looked fine and didn't need it. I had one girl who is about the same size as me try and talk me out of it all the way up until the day I left. But in the end I felt more and more like she didn't want to see me get healthier because she liked that I was a bit bigger. It still ended up as a topic of gossip, no one seemed to have the sense to ask me things and instead made stuff up amoung each other about what I was going for. I corrected people that it wasn't liposuction, it was an entire life change and I was the one doing the work for it.

 

I started the process last year, at that time I let my managers know. I kept them updated on all of it and as soon as I got a date I told them. They were of course annoyed, I was going to need 6 weeks off because my job requires heavy lifting as well as 12 hour shifts on my feet. I didn't really care, this was my choice for improvement and they had more than fair warning that it was coming. I mean seriously a year! I had told them once the new year rolled over that since I had better insurance that I was applying, a week or so after applying I had a date that was 35 days from that time. By the time I left they still hadn't sorted out the schedule it seemed and I think they are figuring it out day by day.

 

<_< The big question was, since I work in a hospital, was I having my surgery there. I told them never in a million years would I have it where I work. I'd get no privacy and it again would become gossip. It was bad enough one of them called the other hospital and was connected to my room to check on me. I appriciated Carol's concern, but I was a day out of surgery and in a great deal of pain so I kept it breif as she filled me on someone getting fired and other things. Bless her heart, I was on pain killers so I wasn't all there I think.

Edited by Betsey

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I have gossips where I work, too. Once when I was so frustrated at being so big that I couldn't get a seatbelt on, I said that I was planning on doing something drastic about my weight. All she could say is "Don't!!" and she gave me some Weight Watcher gimmick thing where foods are given points and you can't exceed X number of points in a day. Her motives were good, I guess, but I don't feel I will get the support from work. People LOVE to stand around the coffee machine and gossip.

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After my approval from my insurance.  I told my supervisor as I knew someone needed to cover my clients.  I had to notify H.R. as I went out on FMLA.   I told a few coworkers and that was it.  Got positive responses from everyone.  I told my clients I would be out on personal leave as it is unprofessional for me to discuss anything personal with them.  I heard some stories after from my supervisor about people she knew who gained all the weight back.  Just let it roll off my back.  

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I warned my boss that I will likely be going on medical leave/FMLA once I was seriously considering WLS.  When I got insurance approval and a surgery date, I told my boss that I will be taking medical leave for 2 weeks and that was it.  I told my team the same thing.  No more, no less.  This was too personal of a decision to share with anyone at work and I don't want to deal with questions about it from my coworkers.

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