greytness

Intimidated by all the perfect eaters

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Im only on day 6 am I've been reading the whole forum and I'm intimidated! It seems like the majority of successful people eat perfect all the time. I have little faith that I can ever eat perfect all the time. I figured that I would try the best I could and that there would be times I'd mess up but that the bypass would hopefully prevent me from overdoing a mess up. Like I might eat one cookie, not six. But reading the forums makes me feel like anyone who eats one cookie gains weight back and that to succeed you have to be all no carb, all perfect all the time. If I could do that, I wouldn't be so overweight to begin with. I'm just so scared of failure after 7 years of hardly any weight loss with the lapband.

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It's funny to read this as I lick off a tablespoon of peanut butter.....

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Oh greytness, I promise you that not one of us are perfect and that every single one of us here has put at least one thing in their mouth they shouldn't have!

To be honest, I have viewed the gastric bypass as a way to remember how much I really do love healthy foods and how they make me feel after I eat them. Everything in moderation can be okay, but it's the second we go past a moderate amount that trouble starts. That is why some of us choose to stay away from carbs completely, because we know just a little will turn into a whole lot over time. I don't eat bread, pasta or rice because I absolutely know those are my downfalls. Have I taken a bite? Yes, one bite. It didn't hurt me, nor did it churn my stomach. I didn't dump. But you know what did happen? I wanted the rest. I wanted every last drop of that bread I took a bite from. That's how I know that touching those kinds of carbs is a big no-no for me.

Some people have whole wheat bread, like one slice to make a half of a turkey sandwich. That's okay, too, if they can handle it. Again, moderation is key. Healthy foods are great for us, but if it is something that is going to trigger overeating, than it's off the list. Several people here, including myself, can and do eat protein bars. I've never been one, pre op, to eat candy bars, so having a protein bar is just a convenient way to eat a meal on the go. For others? That protein bar might as well BE a candy bar, and they have a hard time eating just one. Those people avoid protein bars and that is the smartest thing they can do for themselves.

So you see, beyond the first 6-12 weeks, where your body is healing up and the diet is specifically designed to not hurt your new little pouch or sleeve, the rest is going to be about establishing good eating habits and setting up your own personal boundaries. I like putting my food into a food diary, like MyFitnessPal. This keeps me accountable and also shows me how much protein and calories I'm getting in daily. The days I don't track tend to be days I'm messing up somewhere (not enough protein, too many calories, etc.). It's worth trying if you haven't already.

You will mess up. All of us do. Your actions after those mistakes are what matter. Keep your head up and push through these next few weeks of healing (walk, walk, walk!). After that, you'll be seeing how much control you can have over food and how you can take your life back, if you truly want it back.

GOOD LUCK :)

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I had my GBS on the 29th. also, and I don't think being successful means that you never slip up, its that you work hard, lose weight, and when you do slip up, you get right back on track.

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i'm far from a perfect eater. i think a lot of people post the positive and not so much the negative because they don't want to seem like a failure. because lets be honest surgery or no surgery there are still people that will judge for every piece of food you put in your mouth. the way i see it as unhealthy to not have those days i mean its a very hard hard habit to break. i dont harp on people because i know i'm just gonna stress them out and that's not helping them. just take it one day at a time if you mess up dust yourself off and start tomorrow a new. everyone's journey is different and we have all had to deal with the fat girl/fat guy in the mirror at one point and time. u have already proven yourself a strong person by having this surgery so i know you have it in you to succeed.

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Just eat real food and you'll be good. My NUT told me at my first meeting with her after surgery to eat whatever I wanted and get it out of my system. I remember her words were "you can only eat a few bites anyway". She was right and I did eat some things early on that probably weren't the best like mashed potatoes or french fries but I needed the calories and I could only eat a few bites anyway. I also learned the hard way that anything wth real sugar in it was not my friend. Now I eat meat, fruit, salad and nuts and have little desire for anything else.

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I am almost a year out and I am struggling with haveing told myself that peanut butter toast was good for me, and after all I can eat just one a day wont hurt. NOT SO. now I am up to 3 a day. I am just like an alcoholic, I cant have just one. Now I am at a standstill and have to make the choice to stay away from bread. It is a weakness with me. And also if you fill up on bad choices you cant git in all the proteins and things that you need to stay healthy. But we all have weaknesses. just got to fight it. Good luck Connie

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I'm far from a perfect eater, although eating as perfect as I can has led to my success of keeping the weight off after I got through the honeymoon phase. If you have a cookie once in a while, it's not going to hurt you but you have to remember that you had this surgery to help yourself and it involves mind over matter as well. You can do this. If you have a bad day, pick yourself up and start fresh tomorrow. :)

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i think people that say they are perfect are only lying.......

we all make mistakes in this i think the key is to try to keep a handle on it either learn from it or try to limit yourself.. if you have a weakness you know you cant resist try to find the healthiest possible option to satisfy that need you have if you have issues finding something try talking to your NUT or talk to us here about it.. God i remember making a strawberry cheesecake when i was what 6 months post op????????? i also made pancakes, waffles.. so much other stuff .. no flour or sugar with protein up the wazu ...

but there were days i had chips and pizza.. i would just control it and put it in my fitness pal and it was not often...

hope it helps!!!!!!!!!

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Thanks all! I'm really going to try hard, I am

Going to try tracking

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Nope, not perfect. But WAY better than pre-op! Yesterday I had a piece of candy at work. One piece and not the amount I would have indulged in prior to WLS. My tool works. If I ate more than that I would have been ill.

Last night I ate the crust with my pizza instead of just the protein toppings. But today was planned out and healthy for me. Tonight I will pack my lunches for the rest of the week and they will have enough options to get me through the day without feeling deprived.

It is amazing how we can do this.

Since I lost my weight, my sister got on the new lifestyle bandwagon. She is an emotional eater. Something good in her clicked and she lost 60# this year by eating right and walking. I am so proud of her will power.

You can do this too!

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I have to agree with some of the othe posters. I am only 4 weeks post op...so I havent been at this long. I know that certian foods are triggers for me. I know that one bite will start a craving that I may not be able to keep in check. The other night I had half of a tater tot...and spent the rest of the night fighting myself to stay out of the kitchen. This was a good lesson for me though and I will not be eating another tater tot for a VERY long time. I dont like that out of control feeling I used to get around food, I hate it. The best way for me not to let that feeling back in is to stay away from my trigger foods.

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Perfect? I don't see anyone thinking they are perfect eaters here. I know I am not. I am 2 months out and made a big error last week. I love, love, love ice cream. I found a No Sugar Added brand of ice cream bars made by Laughing Cow. I got them, thinking just one a day would be possible - NOT. I ate three that night, then three the next day and so on until they were gone. No problems doing so either - no dumping. But I won't do that again for a long time. The odd thing is, I actually think I was tired of them by the time they were gone. No cravings, no regrets. Just don't want that to be a pattern again.

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I have to agree with some of the othe posters. I am only 4 weeks post op...so I havent been at this long. I know that certian foods are triggers for me. I know that one bite will start a craving that I may not be able to keep in check. The other night I had half of a tater tot...and spent the rest of the night fighting myself to stay out of the kitchen. This was a good lesson for me though and I will not be eating another tater tot for a VERY long time. I dont like that out of control feeling I used to get around food, I hate it. The best way for me not to let that feeling back in is to stay away from my trigger foods.

Ahhh... quite wise for only 4 weeks out...

I started this journey with the idea that this "tool" was exactly what I needed to live the life of MODERATION that I have heard about so often. I quickly found out that that life is one I will never enjoy. I fully believe each person has to customize their own program for their success, so if one can be successful LONG TERM (keeping the weight off forever) with the moderation approach, that is wonderful. BUT I cannot. I am one of those folks who eats perfectly-- 99% of the time. REALLY! But, that 1% of going off program is a DOOZY! It's out of control and crazy and embarrassing! And, if I didn't keep a tight leash on my program and aim for 100% perfect, I would eventually moderate myself right back to the old behaviors that made me fat and unhealthy in the first place. I am glad I recognized this when I was still experiencing the early benefits of surgery like appetite reduction, extreme restriction, and malabsorption so I could establish such good habits that allow me to now make good choices when my appetite is in full swing, my pouch seems bottomless, and all my calories count. I know it seems easy now, but these things don't give you a boost forever. And, I'll be brutally honest. If it looks like "the majority of successful people eat perfect all the time" or you "feel like anyone who eats one cookie gains weight back and that to succeed you have to be all no carb, all perfect all the time" there may be a little something to that. Keep those thoughts in the back of your mind as you progress and evaluate your experience. Of course, these statements are exaggerations, no one is perfect. But I think reality may lie somewhere in between moderation and perfect... and maybe closer to perfect than you want to embrace right now. I think using this time of restriction, malabsorption and reduced appetite to try your best to be perfect now may help you be able to achieve a level of moderation later that you can both live with and still be successful with. I hope that makes sense without making you feel like you are facing severe deprivation, because it's not about deprivation, it's more about changing your old choices and habits and not even comparing pre op and post op lifestyles. I think it may really be worth reading this thread (with an open mind) to get a few points of view.

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Thanks all. I think part of it is for living 7 years with a failed, problematic lapband has messed with my head and my confidence to suceed. I am really trying to tell myself that that was then, and this is now, but I get very discouraged my posts that make it sound like one cookie causes weight regain. I think it must be what many of you are saying - that one cookie can open the door to more bad habits that cause weight regain. That's why I plan to try tracking - so it will be noticeable if my calorie or carb counts starts going up up and away!

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Nobody is perfect. I drank two cola's during my vacation even though I am not supposed to do it. Keep this thread in mind in the future for when you might slip up.

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I agree a lot with what BugDocMom says. I have to keep my eating mostly always in my program for fear that I might eat the wrong thing and open the door for more. In my 6 months I have followed my program and haven't really tried anything else that I am not supposed to. I am trying to hang on to that for as long as I can!

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