Aviator

Aviator's Log Book

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With my surgery date only 30 hours from now, (6am New Years Eve) I figure it is time for me to start a WLS blog much like "Vim's Umbrella" here on T-T. I've been keeping a blog for more than four years, and wish I was more diligent about writing in it.

Visiting with my surgeon this morning, I told him I felt like a kid going to class whose dog had eaten his homework. That I was not prepared. Eight months of research and, oddly, I feel this way. Im one of those engineers who ALWAYS does his homework. He told me it wasnt too late call it off, or postpone. I then explained to him despite my metaphor, one of my tried and true techniqes of "visualizing success", e.g. thinking about looking down at a scale and seeing 199, like Jim; or throwing away medications, or slipping on that Aquascutum suit I havent worn for years, or like Baja, having some babe say "...nice @*#..." even if she is drunk.

I told the doc that despite being that apprehensive kid, I was now visualizing myself being slim again. Im now certain that I will succeed.

I admit, it is a bit selfish in that I write mostly for me. After keeping a blog for so long, it is gratifying sometimes to come back and read something written long ago, and think, "Did I write that?" or "My, I said that well." or "I must have been nuts to think that." However, in posting here, I really believe that some of my ramblings may benefit someone else who is struggling with some weight loss issues like I am at the genesis of this thread. Who knows what the future holds anyway? :shrugs: Here's an example of an exerpt from my blog from 2004:

Life Experiences: Heaven and Earth aligned

I dont know if my ramblings are of general interest, interest to a few, or simply booooring. That is for you to discern.

But today, at this writing, I am 30 hours pre-op for Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. I weigh 310 lbs. This thread will serve as my "Log Book" in the future. If you like it, please subscribe and feel free to comment. If not, ignore it, and I'll never know. :o

Oddly, I feel that my "Log Book" is also serving as a "Flight Plan" into 2009. Perhaps my journey will inspire someone, as so many of you have inspired me. Thanks for that - all of you.

Happy New Year everyone. It is going to be a great one.

Edited by Aviator

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One other thing I wanted to say is that I am telling only a very close "circle of trust" about this surgery. My bride, my children, and TT members are about the only ones who know. Everyone else thinks I'm having hernia surgery. White lie yes. Plausible yes.

Why? Im fairly certain most of you already know the answer. But here are some justifications for the secrecy.

Number 1 - Im male. Women like to share lots of things and collaborate about all kinds of things. Guys dont. Especially in the very "squared off" button-down collar, coat and tie world where I live much of my life as a CEO. Bouncing ideas around about WLS is a bit too "touchy-feelie" for most mano a mano conversations in the War Room.

Number 2 - Ive read several things in the forum, and in that episode of "House", where in the "outside world" the accomplishment of sustaining a significant weight loss is somehow compromised if one has WLS. Like somehow we "cheated" as opposed to other more traditional (and largely ineffective) weight loss methods. I dont believe it. You dont believe it. But unfortunately, the bias is a fact. I dont want an ad-hoc panel of self appointed "judges" diminishing the accomplishment of me losing 125 lbs.

Number 3 - I believe the surgery is safe enough, and that considering my co-morbidities, WLS is actually the "safest" and most certain route. But I do not want to worry people needlessly. Especially those who depend on me.

So people get information on a "Need to Know Basis"

Its late and I cant sleep.....:rolleyes:

Edited by Aviator

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Just sending u good luck and speedy recovery vibes from across the pond ;)

u will be fine , just stay focused and positive !

And its your business and your decision whom you tell and not !

happy and healthier new year to u xx

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Prayers going your way for a speedy recovery and much success in your weight loss! I have battled with the decision to keep my surgery a secret but I decided in my case its not the wise thing to do. I believe I could possibly help save someone life. So I am sharing on a need to know basis. I am not going to go around wearing a t-shirt that advertises I had weigh loss surgery but I will be open about my experience to those that ask or need to know. Its all a personal decision I think. And it does depend on your circle of friends/network. I think whichever way you decide is the right thing to do.

Happy New and Better You Year! Congrats!

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Best of luck to you on your journey - I think its great that you started a place to share. It allows us to get to know you, and for when those plateus hit, you can re-read about your successes and be encouraged.

Might I make a suggestion? Take pictures every month, too. I did this and created an album and would document my stats monthly (BMI, weight, inches lost, total loss et al). When I hit the plateau at 180 (I excercised ALOT so only hit one wall), I had a lot of success to look at...

Good luck!

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I'll definitely be watching this thread to see what you write and how you progress in your journey. So count me as 'subscribed'! :)

I then explained to him despite my metaphor, one of my tried and true techniqes of "visualizing success", e.g. thinking about looking down at a scale and seeing 199, like Jim

Pssssst! Um, one thing... my scale says 198 (see below)... I know it's a minor thing (1 pound difference HEAVIER), but I thought I'd point it out. :rolleyes:

I'll let it slide, though, because I know you've got a LOT more important things on your mind right now. LOL :D

Edited by JimM
spelling

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Now wait a minute, I CLEARLY stated that the women that made the "Nice @*#" comments , would stand a very good chance of falling slightly below the legal limit to operate a motor vehicle in the state of California!!

Thats my story and Im sticking to it!!

The journal is a great idea, I wish I had done it, but I didnt realize before that the results would be so amazing.

As far as the little "secret", well everyone is of their own opinion, and what ever works for you is all good.

Hell I recently joined a little competition with some friends from another forum that involves weight loss. hundred buck each, and there is about 15 of us now, I didnt mention the surgery....and since I have been stuck for about two months, i think its time to figure it out and win some money!!

Does that make me bad?:D:D

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What a great beginning to your weight loss journal. I'm w/ you on the fact that only a select group of people know about my upcoming surgery. Best of luck to you and I really looking forward to reading more. :P

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Gongrat's on your journey. Remember you are only responsible to yourself and your family everyone elses opinon is really abstract. As far as thoughts that we cheated by having this surg the only thing we cheated on was ourselves, by taking years off of our lives with the weight. We are strong, we are brave and we are togather. Now get in there and fight. Look forward to reading more of your journey. We all know this is not the easy way out by any means.

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CONGRATS on deciding to go through with making yourself healthier and happier...... You will be in my prayers. Keep me informed. I am 1.5 weeks out and am soooooo happy I made the choice and I know you will be too.

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i'm so thrilled for you! i had thought you already had the surgery. Your positive outlook is so wonderful and i wish you God speed :)

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Wow.

I wish you the very very best recovery possible.

I just got some bad news that it may take another 6 to 8 weeks before I can get a surgery date.

I'm following in your footsteps....literally....so I will need all the details.

All my thoughts are with you.

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Thank you all for your support. Im really speechless. With all the emotional turmoil in the past 24 hours, you guys are just too much. *wipes a tear* (Im such a wuss sometimes) Something is going on that I didnt really expect. I intuitively KNEW you all would support me as you do to so many here on TT.

What I didnt expect is how warm that support would make me feel. Those that have been in this exact place in time and supported by all of you know the feeling. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. You make me feel great like no one else on the planet can.

Ok now for the apologetics:

1) Sorry Jim - didnt mean to cheat you by a pound the wrong way. Was going on my failing memory instead of checking my sources. :P

2) sassy- Having someone wishing me the best all the way from the UK is special to be sure.

3) And to my other CarolinaGirl "Better You Year". Love it. Ill use it.

4) coptergirl - I will be taking my Pre-Op pics tonight. Thanks for reminding me.

5) Baja - whether the babe is drunk, sober, snockered, just tipsy no matter what. "Nice @*#" is nice to hear (out of Bones' earshot of course) :D

6) veggieLover- thanks for understanding my need to keep WLS a secret.

7) karrie - wow. you said it girl. This is the group that knows the truth of it.

8) Dawnelle - prayers are gratefully accepted. I will need them. I look forward to hearing about your rapid progress in the coming weeks.

9) godsblessedme - no, I havent yet. Just been hanging around a while and learning from the TT forum folks. Thanks for your support too.

....and last but not least

10) time4me has volunteered to keep you all up to date on my progress tomorrow. I (or Bones) will communicate with her via Text Message and she will let you know. Thank you sweetie. Means a lot to me.

I hope I didnt leave anyone out...

Edited by Aviator

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Thank you all for your support. Im really speechless. With all the emotional turmoil in the past 24 hours, you guys are just too much. *wipes a tear* (Im such a wuss sometimes) Something is going on that I didnt really expect. I intuitively KNEW you all would support me as you do to so many here on TT.

What I didnt expect is how warm that support would make me feel. Those that have been in this exact place in time and supported by all of you know the feeling. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. You make me feel great like no one else on the planet can.

Well, I'm not surprised by the support you've gotten. You're a very likable person - it comes across in your writing.

Ok now for the apologetics:

1) Sorry Jim - didnt mean to cheat you by a pound the wrong way. Was going on my failing memory instead of checking my sources. :P

Heh. It's all good, brother. Just giving you some shite. :D

I hope you can get a good nights sleep tonight. The night before my surgery was a jittery, nervous time for me so I can definitely understand if you're in a similar situation.

Okay, I'm off to try to watch Nights in Rodanthe with my S.O. I must love her a LOT to do this... Ugh, I need a stiff drink or a tranq to dull the pain. <sigh>LOL :rolleyes:

Hey! I've got an idea! Wanna switch places? I'll go have your surgery and YOU can watch this movie... sound good? :D

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Good Luck Aviator--you will do great--you have one of the most upbeat optimistic attitudes on this forum! I look forward to reading your blog on a regular basis. I, like Baja, wish I had started a blog also--I never thought it would be as fabulous as it has been. I am so sorry that I did not do this 4 years ago when I first wanted to but being a believer in "things happen for a reason" I will let it go--lol

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Didn't sleep much again last night. Long time to go to sleep, and even then fitful. One bad thing is I've come down with a cold, and was coughing my head off overnight. :P The price of four grandchildren 5 and under in the house over the holidays. T'was an amazing and magical Christmas. They just left yesterday. :)

This will be my last note until I'm post-op.

Thanks again for the well wishes everyone. :D

Funny, I had a weird flashback last night. I was playing football on my school team. It was the first game of the season and I had been unhappily riding the bench the whole game.

"Put me in coach! Put me in coach!" I screamed at Coach Voss.

He turned and look at me and said, "OK kid. Git your @*# in there.", and put me in at right outside linebacker. The very first play from scrimmage the "sweep" play came my way. I put my head right in the running back's chest and wrapped him up - proceeded to end up at the bottom a pile of 21 smelly, muddy guys.

It seemd like forever that I was under that pile. As I stoood up for the next play, everything hurt, and I remember wondering why I was so anxious for the coach to put me in.

Must be freudian.... :D

See you on the other side.

Edited by Aviator

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Hej Aviator!

Still alive and kicking?! I do hope you are not too sore and that the trauma of surgery has been managed well. Golden rule, walk, walk, walk and sip, sip, sip (when you get the green light). Just being able to breathe must feel great, even if you may feel as though that truck has driven across you.

We are here to welcome you on the Losers' bench! What an amazing way to finish and start a year for you! May all my very best wishes take you through magic places and back into the flight of fantasy. I'm still busy reading your amazing blogs. I'm so glad you have set up your own log diary!

Remember to keep a log of these immediate days. If you need to laugh, Omaha Jim's "The Lesser Man" diaries (link in his signature line) are a great fun and inspiration to read - he takes your mind off things, the very things you are reading about though! Weird, but it really works because he explains so well what you yourself are experiencing.

Best wishes to you and we look forward to hearing how things went are are for you!

Big (gentle) hugs!

Cheers,

Vim

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Aviator,

I'm so excited for you and know that you will be a big success in losing the weight. I can hardly wait to read more on your blog about all your successes, struggles, etc. You are a very inspiring guy and I enjoy reading your posts.

Good luck!

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Hopefully you're doing well. We can compare notes later.

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It is an expression I use after every successful landing. Seems appropriate here as well.

Back at home, sip sip sipping, and tomorrow I walk. I do feel like a truck ran over me. Unapologetically passing gas from both appropriate orifices, but no poo yet. Didnt realize my stomach would be distended further Post op than Pre-op.

Thanks again everyone for all your support

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Hey! Welcome back, Aviator! It's good to hear from you!

I remember those first two weeks were rough for me with regard to getting enough water in, so it's good to hear you're remembering to get your fluids in.

And yes, I can definitely identify with feeling like being hit by a truck... each day should get a little bit better, though. You'll be feeling back to your normal self in no time. :)

It's good to have you back posting again!

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Aviator

I am glad to hear that you are back and did well. The first weeks was the hardest for me, now it is going well. They sure call it hell week for a reason!

Sip sip sip, you may have to retrain your mouth as to what is an acceptable amout of sipping. I am still having to remember that.

I completely understand wanting to keep this secret, a secret as I am doing the same thing.

I can not wait to see you as you progress, it is a great feeling to see that needle on the scale going down.

Happy New Year wishes to you!

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AVIATOR......

Yes I knew you would do well,,,,,, you are awesome. Welcome back to the family. Remember to do everything the doctor says and you will be fine. Can not wait to see the changes in you in the coming months. You are right behind me. Let's do this my friend......

HAPPY NEW YEAR

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