AliPat

5 lbs to lose for surgery approval

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These 5 lbs seem like the hardest 5 lbs ever ever chosen to lose!  

Hi, New here.  I've been lurking for a few weeks.  Learning a lot.  I'm midway in my pre-op journey.  I'm at S sac Kaiser.  I've done the orientation, nutrition class, support group and appt with surgeon.  I was given 13 lbs to lose before psych eval and surgery scheduling.  I've lost between 8-10 lbs depending on the day.  I keep bouncing between 220-222.  Reading another post, where the question was, "should i have surgery before or after the holidays?" really got me thinking.  I know I want the surgery asap.... but these last 5 lbs are killin me.  I work in a place that makes it almost impossible to lose weight, regardless of the season.  We have a potluck or party nearly every week of the year. 

Of course today we had a HUGE halloween party.  I had a 150cal shake for breakfast to allow myself some wiggle room at the party.  One bite of this, lead to one bite of that, lead to two (small) slivers of cake.  Of course the guilt and shame came after as my food tracking ap reminded me I was already over my 1200 cal limit for the day.  Guess it's a shake for dinner too!

Anyways, I'm glad I logged on here and read a bit.  There is no one that can get me to surgery date but me.  And I want to thank @Cjireh for the quote of the day.

"if i wait for one more (what ever) I'll never have it"  something like that.

I now know that I may need to isolate from the festivities in order to get what I so desperately need.

Thanks to everyone here.  Though we have never met or spoke, you have already helped me.   MUAH

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I know I've already welcomed you on another thread AliPat but I'll send you another wave from the PNW anyway.  wave_smiley102.gif

I came to the conclusion that there was never really a better time to have my WLS.  What with birthdays, and other celebrations and festivities, I always had an excuse to overindulge so I just bit the bullet and knuckled down and although I went to potlucks and parties, I took my own tupperware container with raw veggies, low fat dip etc. etc.

There's a saying I'm fond of:  "If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse".

 

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I was approved for surgery even though I didn’t lose the full amount that I was told to. I was 4 lbs short, but I did everything else that was asked of me and kept detailed food logs which I submitted. I was told that my insurance company was one of the toughest, so I was sure I wouldn’t get approved. I was wrong, and am now scheduled for surgery right before Thanksgiving. I definitely never expected to have surgery right before the holidays, but I’ve come to terms with it. I’ve eaten my way through many holidays, and this year, I’m ready for something new.

Welcome, and best of luck to you, whatever you decide. :)

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2 minutes ago, Boho Rosy said:

...

....... I’ve eaten my way through many holidays, and this year, I’m ready for something new.

...

With a mindset like that - you're going to do well with your WLS.

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Welcome to both of you. I have to agree with Cinwa that a great mindset will go a long way with this surgery and lifestyle change.

Good luck and I look forward to following you both along your journey

Edited by Readytobeme

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4 hours ago, AliPat said:

I now know that I may need to isolate from the festivities in order to get what I so desperately need.

Welcome to the forum!

The surgery is only a tool and you will still have to do some work, if you want the benefit of the tool. Now is the time to start learning how to deal with the eating issues in your work environment. If you don't figure it out it now, then post-op, your results may be lackluster. 

The head game is the hardest part to conquer, and I wish you well friend :-)

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Welcome, @AliPat

I agree that work food parties are the worst - there's never much (anything) healthy, and they seem to happen every week (or more often) in some workplaces. How do some people eat that many donuts and that much cake and stay thin??? I guess some people can, but certainly not me.  @cinwa's suggestion of bringing along your own snacks is a good one. Then you can participate without indulging. I've also found it effective to set myself some hard limits that are absolute "do not cross this line" rules for a while until I feel I've trained myself to have a healthier relationship toward food. Certainly one bite of cake isn't going to ruin anyone's diet, but it's the one-bite-leads-to-another that does it for me -_- If I have none, I'm more likely to be successful. That's a policy that's not for everyone, to be sure, but it's provided me with some strength from time to time. 

Have you tried going really low carb? That might be a way to shake off those last 5 pounds. It seems to work for many people when they get stuck. 1200 calories per day sounds really reasonable for pre-op, btw - not torturous, but low enough to make you be pretty careful, as training for post-op. 

As a million others have said before me, the only thing I'd change about my surgery was doing it earlier, whether that meant during the holidays or whatever. I had mine on Valentine's Day :) The sooner it happens, the sooner you'll be on your way to leading a whole new life. It's very exciting, and very much worth skipping some holiday food for! 

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16 hours ago, cinwa said:

I always had an excuse to overindulge so I just bit the bullet and knuckled down and although I went to potlucks and parties, I took my own tupperware container with raw veggies, low fat dip etc. etc.

There's a saying I'm fond of:  "If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse".

 

Good Idea about being prepared and bringing my own food.  I could easily bring a 350cal atkins frozen lunch.  

16 hours ago, Boho Rosy said:

I was approved for surgery even though I didn’t lose the full amount that I was told to. I was 4 lbs short, but I did everything else that was asked of me and kept detailed food logs which I submitted.   Welcome, and best of luck to you, whatever you decide. :)

I have Kaiser.  The insurance is my doctor and the doctor is the insurance.  The bariatric center will not schedule my next appointment until I reach my pre-weight goal.  So they said, but.... I will call to day to confirm.  Who knows....maybe I'll get lucky.    Best of luck to you too.  I'm excited for a new life.

12 hours ago, Michael_A said:

The head game is the hardest part to conquer, and I wish you well friend :-)

Agreed.  Thanks for the reminder.  I know I have some dark days ahead of me, when I hit an emotional wall and no longer have food to turn to.  But, Just like having your first child, you can read all the baby books while you are pregnant, but nothing will prepare you for the reality of being a parent.  That said, there's no time like the present to get the ball rolling.  And on that note, I just turned down a chile verde breakfast burrito.  I love my job, I love my job, I love my job!!!!! -_-

11 hours ago, Jen581791 said:

 I've also found it effective to set myself some hard limits that are absolute "do not cross this line" rules for a while until I feel I've trained myself to have a healthier relationship toward food. Certainly one bite of cake isn't going to ruin anyone's diet, but it's the one-bite-leads-to-another that does it for me  If I have none, I'm more likely to be successful. That's a policy that's not for everyone, to be sure, but it's provided me with some strength from time to time.  Have you tried going really low carb?

Jen, this is what I was getting at.  As an addict and Binger and stress eater, I need to set some hard rules and boundaries for myself.  Once the plate is in hand, no matter how strong my will or conviction, things get out of control before I know what I ate.  I eat pretty healthy, with awareness 90% of the time.  it's my moments of weakness that add up to failure.  I've been in the same 20 lb range for over a decade.  Generally speaking, not in too bad of shape, until this year.  Diagnosed with MS after going blind in one eye.  Now we know that last years 6mo episode was ms too, for 6 mos I could barely stand or walk for 5 min at a time.  

Low carb is the ONLY way for me.  I have PCOS and technically not supposed to have carbs anyways.  It's time to set some boundaries with food.  

Here is the most ridiculously ironic part of my "life story"....  I'm sort of a social worker at the welfare department and I teach Job search and life skills.  In that....I teach boundaries!!! And I'm pretty good at it too, teaching it that is.  I learned some AMAZING tools about boundaries when I left my ex-husband (abusive alcoholic).  Learned about my life long issues with co-dependency, learned to set boundaries with people, money etc.... and now it is time to set boundaries with food.

I shouldn't be allowed to pick up the fork until I can trust myself to do the right thing with it !!!

 

Thanks for all the welcoming advice and support.

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Welcome @AliPat!!!  I applaud you for taking the next step in what seems like some pretty difficult health issues this year.  You sound like you have an amazing outlook, and are a "can do" sorta gal.  Our starting weights are pretty similar (less that fact that I am taller).  This journey has been amazing.  My low points have been far outshadowed by the many victories post-surgery.  I don't even think I have sleep apnea anymore! :)  Work can also be challenging for me since I work in a Police Department.  People drop off donuts and sweets a LOT.  We receive numerous emails about the new goodies in the breakroom.  It's pretty empowering to know it is up to ME to delete that email, and stay out of the breakroom.  Today there is Halloween candy in there.  I peeked in the bag, and at 4.5 months post surgery, I wasn't even tempted.  Keep us updated on your insurance stuff <3 

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There are always potlucks lurking!!!  I started always bringing a healthier contribution to potlucks so that I would have something guilt free to enjoy.  I've had quite a few people thank me for bringing something healthy to share as there are a lot of people with food issues.  I also scope out the offerings and plan for a few bites of protein-heavy offerings and stay away from the sugar and fat bombs.

At work, we started having a different kind of potluck; we have something like a taco bar where everyone signs up to bring an ingredient.  Makes it easier and cheaper plus we are less likely to overeat and can "customize" our own plate.  We've done soup day where everyone brings an ingredient and we put it all in the crockpot for to simmer until lunch; we've done salad bar, potato bar, breakfast burritos.  It is pretty popular as we are mostly busy moms (or tired-of-cooking for others moms) and most are usually watching calories or carbs or gluten or sugar or ...

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@AliPat  Just tons of good advice and good vibes above...

Am finding it useful at potlucks at work to have a big mug of coffee, or water, or tea, or whatever - keeps my hands busy (idle hands being the tools of the Weight Loss Devils and so forth) and any time I think about putting something solid into my mouth, I raise the cup. 

The other penny (of the two cents to consider) is upping your exercise. Not knowing your capacity right now given the weight and your MS, --- but I find when I am stalled or just not moving along that upping my exercise makes a huge difference, sometimes to a degree that is not explainable... add 300 calories a day of exercise and BOOM my weight loss increases by half a pound a day, which doesn't make "sense" (but then maybe neither did my stall). On the far side of your surgery the habit of a bit of exercise may help you out too. 

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57 minutes ago, TammyP said:

 I applaud you for taking the next step in what seems like some pretty difficult health issues this year.  You sound like you have an amazing outlook, and are a "can do" sorta gal. 

Thank You.... sometimes we really need a cheer leader for our hurdles crossed, no matter how small.  In the last 6 weeks I have joined a gym and been attending 3-5dys a week, quit my 35y habit of smoking (5wks sober) started a 1200 cal diet, mostly given up my morning coffee, and dodged 50% of the potlucks/food deliveries around here.  I have always been the one lifting someone else up, helping others, teaching others, saving others, putting EVERYONE before me.  It's really hard to put myself first and take care of myself.  But I'm learning.

Sounds like you have been doing really well post op, and that is very inspiring! Keep up the good work!

47 minutes ago, msmarymac said:

At work, we started having a different kind of potluck; we have something like a taco bar where everyone signs up to bring an ingredient.  Makes it easier and cheaper plus we are less likely to overeat and can "customize" our own plate.  We've done soup day where everyone brings an ingredient and we put it all in the crockpot for to simmer until lunch; we've done salad bar, potato bar, breakfast burritos.  It is pretty popular as we are mostly busy moms (or tired-of-cooking for others moms) and most are usually watching calories or carbs or gluten or sugar or ...

these are awesome Ideas.... I'm going to get my coworkers in on this if it kills me!

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9 minutes ago, BurgundyBoy said:

Am finding it useful at potlucks at work to have a big mug of coffee, or water, or tea, or whatever - keeps my hands busy (idle hands being the tools of the Weight Loss Devils and so forth) and any time I think about putting something solid into my mouth, I raise the cup. 

The other penny (of the two cents to consider) is upping your exercise. Not knowing your capacity right now given the weight and your MS, --- but I find when I am stalled or just not moving along that upping my exercise makes a huge difference, sometimes to a degree that is not explainable... add 300 calories a day of exercise and BOOM my weight loss increases by half a pound a day, which doesn't make "sense" (but then maybe neither did my stall). On the far side of your surgery the habit of a bit of exercise may help you out too. 

Brilliant.... a pacifier.... love it!  I am vaping ( zero nicotine ) and it helps a lot.  great idea for the mug.  I'll get right on that.

As for exercise, I didn't even think about me having been sick and not going to the gym as the culprit for my stall.  MS is a consideration, but I'm up to 25min on the elliptical and treadmill.  the treadmill is much harder on my back, sometimes I almost collapse at about 10min...thank god for the hand rails.  but the elliptical is super comfortable for me.  I'm going back tonight after a week off due to cold.

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1 minute ago, AliPat said:

...  In the last 6 weeks I have joined a gym and been attending 3-5dys a week, quit my 35y habit of smoking (5wks sober) started a 1200 cal diet, mostly given up my morning coffee, and dodged 50% of the potlucks/food deliveries around here.  I have always been the one lifting someone else up, helping others, teaching others, saving others, putting EVERYONE before me.  It's really hard to put myself first and take care of myself.  But I'm learning.  ....

Oh you will do fine. Anyone who can quit smoking can do this. Kudos on the gym attendance too. Not a trivial task to build some of these good habits. 

The thing I aim for is to schedule my daily exercise FIRST and then figure out my other obligations. It's a way to put myself first now. Many days it's not easy. 

On the lighter side, Coffee has no calories, am on my 3rd strong cup of expresso-grade black stuff for the day now. It's the beverage I'm putting in my mouth now, instead of giving in to my desire for my mid-afternoon snack early. Living on the Wild Side... :P

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2 minutes ago, AliPat said:

Brilliant.... a pacifier.... love it!  I am vaping ( zero nicotine ) and it helps a lot.  great idea for the mug.  I'll get right on that.

As for exercise, I didn't even think about me having been sick and not going to the gym as the culprit for my stall.  MS is a consideration, but I'm up to 25min on the elliptical and treadmill.  the treadmill is much harder on my back, sometimes I almost collapse at about 10min...thank god for the hand rails.  but the elliptical is super comfortable for me.  I'm going back tonight after a week off due to cold.

(I have a bad back, in the last year taken up swimming in addition to my long-term love of cycling. In my youth I found swimming laps boring; now it's a form of meditation. And much easier on my back and hips than the upright stuff or running)

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2 hours ago, AliPat said:

In the last 6 weeks I have joined a gym and been attending 3-5dys a week, quit my 35y habit of smoking (5wks sober) started a 1200 cal diet, mostly given up my morning coffee, and dodged 50% of the potlucks/food deliveries around here.  I have always been the one lifting someone else up, helping others, teaching others, saving others, putting EVERYONE before me.  It's really hard to put myself first and take care of myself.  But I'm learning.

Sounds like you have been doing really well post op, and that is very inspiring! Keep up the good work!

Thank you!  It has been an amazing journey, and daily people are now asking me (at work) what is my "secret".  Apparently they don't gossip here much, because I tell everyone haha.  And WOW at the smoking habit kicked!  My husband quit 5 years ago, and I know it is probably one of the strongest addictions to kick to the curb (akin to cocaine/meth).  I agree with BB, if you can do that, this will be a piece of cake! :)

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@AliPat Welcome aboard.

I am impressed that you are going forward with WLS, considering that MS is a challenge in itself. My best friend has MS, so I've seen first hand the complexities оf the disease. If you are taking any steroids or infusions, it's no wonder that your weight has been a challenge. Your determination to get healthy is admirable. 

Happy to meet you. 

Edited by NerdyLady

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On ‎11‎/‎1‎/‎2017 at 1:46 PM, AliPat said:

Brilliant.... a pacifier.... love it!  I am vaping ( zero nicotine ) and it helps a lot.  great idea for the mug.  I'll get right on that.

As for exercise, I didn't even think about me having been sick and not going to the gym as the culprit for my stall.  MS is a consideration, but I'm up to 25min on the elliptical and treadmill.  the treadmill is much harder on my back, sometimes I almost collapse at about 10min...thank god for the hand rails.  but the elliptical is super comfortable for me.  I'm going back tonight after a week off due to cold.

Hey welcome! Fellow vaper here. I quit smoking after 20 years in order to have the surgery. I can say now that I'm a little ways out that quitting smoking and having this surgery at the same time has been amazing. Before weight was always an excuse not to quit. "If I quit, I'll gain more weight". I don't have that crunch because I am focused on losing more than the not smoking. It's been surprisingly easy once I got over the first few weeks.

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On 11/1/2017 at 11:47 AM, BurgundyBoy said:

Oh you will do fine. Anyone who can quit smoking can do this. Kudos on the gym attendance too. Not a trivial task to build some of these good habits. 

The thing I aim for is to schedule my daily exercise FIRST and then figure out my other obligations. It's a way to put myself first now. Many days it's not easy. 

On the lighter side, Coffee has no calories, am on my 3rd strong cup of expresso-grade black stuff for the day now. It's the beverage I'm putting in my mouth now, instead of giving in to my desire for my mid-afternoon snack early. Living on the Wild Side... :P

 

On 11/9/2017 at 5:17 AM, Smashlee83 said:

Hey welcome! Fellow vaper here. I quit smoking after 20 years in order to have the surgery. I can say now that I'm a little ways out that quitting smoking and having this surgery at the same time has been amazing. Before weight was always an excuse not to quit. "If I quit, I'll gain more weight". I don't have that crunch because I am focused on losing more than the not smoking. It's been surprisingly easy once I got over the first few weeks.

Quitting was hard the first week, but vaping made all the difference. the second week.... as long as i had my vape on me, I was good.  I would just go vape in the emergency stair well at work or the bathroom...two hits and i could go back to my desk.  after that it was kind of easy.  it's been 7 weeks now since my last cigarette and 4 weeks since i had nicotine in my mod..... and I don't even really vape anymore.  once in a while when a trigger hits, I go looking for my vape....most of the time I'm over it before I find the dang thing.  Quitting and losing weight at the same time is almost unheard of.  I think, like you, that me wanting this surgery so bad helped me do both the quitting and losing weight since both are a mandatory requirement. Kaiser sure knows how to black mail someone! 

I used to be mad, frustrated, and generally irritated with the kaiser pre-op requirements.  I wanted it now, and how dare they try to keep me from it!!!

Truth be told, now that I am on the other side of quitting and 11 lbs lighter, I am very happy that they made me do it.  Knowing how easily you can become cross addicted to other substances after surgery, I am glad I had to fight these addiction demons BEFORE I didn't have food to turn to. I can't imagine losing ALL my "crutches" at the same time. I was a bit of a mad woman a few weeks ago,  slightly homicidal, but I honestly have a more zen like state now.  Not that I don't have triggers and dark moments, cuz I do, they just pass much more quickly now and I come to my senses quicker.  

On 11/8/2017 at 10:07 PM, NerdyLady said:

@AliPat Welcome aboard.

I am impressed that you are going forward with WLS, considering that MS is a challenge in itself. My best friend has MS, so I've seen first hand the complexities оf the disease. If you are taking any steroids or infusions, it's no wonder that your weight has been a challenge. Your determination to get healthy is admirable. 

Happy to meet you. 

 

Thank you! Currently I am not taking any MS protocol.  No steroids or infusions.  Long story on the reasons for my decision, but the gist is that I am hoping that weight loss & surgery will help me fight this stuff by being able to be compliant on the MS diet.  Hoping to manage MS through diet and holistic means as the drugs (from the outside looking in) appear to be nearly as brutal as the disease.  I am also looking into "alternative" therapies like Montel Williams.  Would like to be a pioneer in this new world of "alternate" therapies.  Hope your friend is getting by good, MS sucks!

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