jules_78

Struggling against bulimia

11 posts in this topic

Hi folks, hope everyone is doing fine. Unfortunatley I'm not. I have recently been diagnosed with bulimia. Yep. That's right. It all started a couple of months ago, after my breakdown and when my snacking urge got worse and worse and I started overeating. I first thought that the post op physical limitation would make me stop eating. Oh boy, was I wrong. It just got worse and worse. I can't stop eating until I'm really full and sick. Obviously, I feel really bad and guilty for eating so much and I have to take laxatives everyday ( I hate throwing up!). My episodes of chewing and spitting also got worse, I can do that more than five times a day. 

I'm now 10 and a half post op and the idea of regaining weight scares me to death, but on the other hand, I can't control myself. I had WLS to feel and live better, but now life's a nightmare. Honestly I've reached a point where if I could go back time, I'd never have had surgery. I truly wish I could feel good about it as everybody else does, but I can't. 

I'm starting therapy tomorrow and just hope better times will come soon as this is affecting my personal and professional life. 

 

cinwa, NerdyLady, Stephtay and 1 other like this

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Like all addictions, openly admitting the problem is the first step to recovery Jules and I'm so glad to hear that you're starting therapy tomorrow.

Better times will come my friend and please keep updating us.  I know that you are not alone but the more you talk about it, the more it will help you and hopefully others who aren't yet in a place to open up this very serious eating disorder.

jules_78 and Stephtay like this

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9 minutes ago, cinwa said:

Like all addictions, openly admitting the problem is the first step to recovery Jules and I'm so glad to hear that you're starting therapy tomorrow.

Better times will come my friend and please keep updating us.  I know that you are not alone but the more you talk about it, the more it will help you and hopefully others who aren't yet in a place to open up this very serious eating disorder.

Thanks, cinwa, much appreciated! 

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Oh Jules, I'm so glad you're addressing the problem. I hope your therapist is a great fit for you and you two can turn this around. Hugs. Please continue to update us.

jules_78 and Stephtay like this

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Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry to hear you are going through this.As Cinwa said, Better times are on the way. 

jules_78 likes this

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3 hours ago, jules_78 said:

Hi folks, hope everyone is doing fine. Unfortunatley I'm not. I have recently been diagnosed with bulimia. Yep. That's right. It all started a couple of months ago, after my breakdown and when my snacking urge got worse and worse and I started overeating. I first thought that the post op physical limitation would make me stop eating. Oh boy, was I wrong. It just got worse and worse. I can't stop eating until I'm really full and sick. Obviously, I feel really bad and guilty for eating so much and I have to take laxatives everyday ( I hate throwing up!). My episodes of chewing and spitting also got worse, I can do that more than five times a day. 

I'm now 10 and a half post op and the idea of regaining weight scares me to death, but on the other hand, I can't control myself. I had WLS to feel and live better, but now life's a nightmare. Honestly I've reached a point where if I could go back time, I'd never have had surgery. I truly wish I could feel good about it as everybody else does, but I can't. 

I'm starting therapy tomorrow and just hope better times will come soon as this is affecting my personal and professional life. 

 

Jules my older sister at age 64 was diagnosed with her lifelong (45+ years) bulimia. She is much better now after she went through treatment. (We joke and laugh that I could have used a touch of her bulimia and she a touch of my obesity). When I was 14 and fat, I lost a huge amount of weight over a summer (40? 60 lbs?) as I was so unhappy with my weight. I had lost so much weight, no one recognized me when I started my next year of high school. In retrospect, was I an adolescent boy anorexic? Got me. Sometimes we just stumble forward without real vision about what is going on...

Wherever you end up you will be in more control. Life will be less nightmarish whatever you think of WLS. Be sure to be easy on yourself, we all are trying to do our best with the tools we have available to us. What a complex business all this is.  "There but for the grace of God go I," and I am with you. << Support>> << Empathy>>

jules_78 likes this

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Hi everyone, today I went to the second session of therapy. I must say I'm doing much better - also been prescribed Prozac. My eating urge has decreased a lot and I haven't any of those horrible "chew and spit" episodes. 

I am confident better times are coming soon! Love and hugs to you all and thanks very much for your support! Bless you all!

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27 minutes ago, jules_78 said:

Hi everyone, today I went to the second session of therapy. I must say I'm doing much better - also been prescribed Prozac. My eating urge has decreased a lot and I haven't any of those horrible "chew and spit" episodes. 

I am confident better times are coming soon! Love and hugs to you all and thanks very much for your support! Bless you all!

What a great update! So glad you're making good progress so quickly! Hugs.

Jen581791 likes this

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So glad therapy + pharma is helping. Good for you :) 

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Sorry to hear this. Sounds like you've taken all the right steps to take care of yourself. Hang in there, there is much to love about your new life!

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On 7/31/2017 at 4:55 PM, jules_78 said:

Hi everyone, today I went to the second session of therapy. I must say I'm doing much better - also been prescribed Prozac. My eating urge has decreased a lot and I haven't any of those horrible "chew and spit" episodes. 

I am confident better times are coming soon! Love and hugs to you all and thanks very much for your support! Bless you all!

Progress. << Happy for you >>

NerdyLady likes this

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