onyxlion

5 Weeks Post-Op RNY Before & After

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So I'm down 30 lbs since my surgery.  I had gastric bypass done on 11/1.  I'm down a total of 80 lbs since I started the 6 month program prior to surgery.

I have to say... I really had no idea all of the different ways I would have to make adjustments in my life... This whole thing really is completely life altering.  I'm still getting used to the changes... Having surgery really doesn't change your attitudes towards foods it just changes the way your body functions... Examples: I got my period and I still crave chocolate. I watch a football game and still want beer and wings... Those cravings don't change, your mentality has to change. But my saving grace is that I physically can't eat those things if I wanted to. You have to chew your food so much that by the time it's ready to swallow you really don't want to ingest it anymore.  And the things you can swallow quickly, like chocolate, make me nauseous.  I know I'm only less than 2 months out so I know it will get easier but right now is quite the transition period.

Another big thing is that all along I've tried to keep me getting gastric bypass done my private business.  However now I think I'm beyond the secret part... I've had differing comments from many co-workers and acquaintances varying from "are you ill and dying?" to "oh you HAD to have gotten gastric bypass." I feel like most of me is quickly melting away so I can only imagine what people are thinking... But part of me just wanted to make the changes in my life and get things going in a positive direction without any comments or interference. I can't explain my attitude right now but I have mixed emotions on how I should feel... Anybody experience these feelings or something similar?  

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Great job so far on your weight loss!  

Except for my family and people at my office (who have been very supportive), I have not told many people that I had a gastric bypass. You really do not have to tell people that you had a gastric bypass when they ask how you lost weight, you can simply (and truthfully) tell them that you went on a high protein and low calorie diet.  

ShrinkingViolet2 and onyxlion like this

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You look amazing already. There's certainly no way you look ill. Some people just don't accept that you can lose large amounts of weight without surgery, and clearly you did an excellent job of it during your 6 months prep because your early photo certainly doesn't look like 350lbs.

I agree with Res Ipsa. There's no need to diviludge to anyone that you had surgery if you don't want to. I don't intend to tell anyone that doesn't need to know.

onyxlion and ShrinkingViolet2 like this

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Every time I dieted throughout the years, I always received unsolicited comments asking if I was ill so don't let that worry you onyxlion.

Truly, you are looking the picture of health.

onyxlion likes this

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Looking great!  I told very few.  I simply didn't consider it their business and negative comments were not welcome!  

When asked if I felt fine-I often answered; "never better".  Or are you sick?  "Why, do I look sick?"  How are you doing it-high protein, low carb...-kinda a modified Atkins under a doctors suppervision.  No lies and not opening ,y personal life for examination..

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You don't owe anyone an explanation. Personally, I just say that I've drastically overhauled my diet. That's not a lie. I have. And if they ask for specifics, I tell them I don't drink anything but water, cut my carb intake, cut out sweets and only eat tiny portions of calorie dense foods. Again, all that is true. I honestly think that a lot of people are looking for some magic bullet when they ask. When they hear about all that I've done, they lose interest (because eating the way we do is hard! I mean, it's easier than without surgery, but like you said OP, the mental stuff doesn't go away). Also, I think it seems like the weight fell off overnight because people don't notice until there's a big difference. When I point out that my weight loss has been over almost 10 months and I've only lost an average of 2.5 lbs/wk, they seem to settle down. Really, I think dramatic weight loss often brings other people's issues to the surface. People who struggle with their weight get curious and possibly jealous, people who have a history of eating disorders get concerned and people who are genuinely happy for you are really encouraging. On a related note, I swear, my best friend gets more questions about my weight loss than I do, so if you want to keep it private, make sure the people you tell will keep their mouths shut. People are freaking nosy, so be prepared for them to ask people close to you questions that they'd never ask you to your face. 

Also, congrats on your loss so far! You're doing amazing!

onyxlion, Aussie H, Shaye and 2 others like this

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Beautiful, before and after.  Keep up the great work!!

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I hear you! I haven't had my surgery yet - but I am wondering about the comments after. I realized that people will ALWAYS have something to say - good or bad. all that matters is how YOU feel. I realized my reservations aren't about what they say - it is my OWN feelings about surgery. a part of me will always feel I "gave up" or "didn't try hard enough" - and I am worried other peoples comments will irrationally validate my thoughts.

so moral of the story - focus on how YOU feel, focus on your NEW journey and realize we live in a superficial world that does not understand we are doing this for our HEALTH not their approvals!

you are killing it!!!!

onyxlion likes this

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You look beautiful...I haven't had my surgery yet.  Shooting for Late Feb - March.  I told some of my closest friends about my plan and

I wish I had not.  My daughter will be the only one who will know exactly when I have surgery.  I know people mean well but they really work

on my thoughts and I haven't been the best mentally right now.  I plan to say that I am doing a high protein low carb diet and increased my

exercise and that is very true.  I have been doing the diet now so that I will have less trouble adjusting closer to surgery.  I do hope that sometime

I will be able to have my feelings not be hurt by others.  And the counseling and the weight loss I know will help me have a better mental picture

and a better image of my physical self.   You hang in there and say only what you are comfortable saying.  You have to take care of you first.

I haven't always taken care of my self but I am working on that.   Just don't let anyone put you down for having surgery.  It is certainly not

the easy way out as what some people have said about me.  Hang in there and just keep enjoying looking in the mirror because how you

feel about you is the only thing that matters.   Good luck....God bless.

onyxlion likes this

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Shaye,

A DS is definitely not the easy way out. What motivates you to have that surgery over a gastric bypass or a vertical sleeve?  In any case, weight loss surgery is not an easy option, but it does allow you to lose a lot of weight and keep it off as long as you stick to the diet. 

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First of all, you look fabulous! Second of all, you don't have to share your personal health decisions with anyone if you don't want to.

And I completely understand and identify with the desire to keep it private. Like you it was hard to articulate why I felt like keeping it to myself; I just did. So when I started losing weight rapidly and people on Facebook, for instance, asked my "secret," I would tell them I'm getting help from a doctor and nutritionist. I just left it at that. After all, there are plenty of non-surgical doctors who work with patients on weight loss. I see them advertise on TV all the time.

I find the 'dying' comment tacky. I don't know if it was said tongue-in-cheek, but if not, I'm sorry. The fact is, you look great (you looked good before I might add. You just look healthier now), and some people are going to be naturally curious about what you did to lose it, others are going to be outright nosy without regard to your feelings, and still others may even feel a twinge of jealousy regarding your transformation. I had one friend on fb tell me I was at the point where I'd lost too much weight, which is bogus. I'm certainly no anorexic and the scale and my doc say otherwise. People just may have a hard to adjusting to your changes.  People's reactions are mixed bag based on their own situations. The point is, you have the complete right to share as much or as little as you want about your weight loss. 

Congrats!

Kim

Edited by Kimchan
Res Ipsa, onyxlion and athenarose like this

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You look great . I did not say anything except to boss or another person - my surgery is scheduled in about 3 weeks. Unfortunately the 2nd person threw in her opinion about whether or not I  should eat something; I was somewhat offended as I have been very diligent about research and application ... especially she doesn'the  really know a lot about the process ... I'm not an expert but am learning. That was one of my fears. Good luck - I'm impressed .

onyxlion likes this

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I only told my closest friends at work, however, being on a hospital unit, everyone noticed I wasn't there while recovering and asking where I was, and of course everyone eventually found out. I was ok with that. I have only received wonderful compliments from my coworkers. They have been most supportive.

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15 hours ago, azibclc said:

I only told my closest friends at work, however, being on a hospital unit, everyone noticed I wasn't there while recovering and asking where I was, and of course everyone eventually found out. I was ok with that. I have only received wonderful compliments from my coworkers. They have been most supportive.

That's wonderful!

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