LoserX

I haven't had experience with the divorce side of things but I have been through the child support side twice in Maricopa county. It is nice because the child support will be calculated by the courts and it is automatically deducted from his paycheck and you can set it up for direct deposit into your checking account. That is how I did mine.
Good Luck with it all. I am sorry you are going through this but from reading your blog it sounds like the best thing for you. How are the kids dealing with it especially your son?

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Jamie
Lap RNY 6-23-08
Starting/Current/Dr's Goal/My Goal
225/188/150/125
Stricture dilated 7/13/07

moniram8

Hey Deb....so sorry u r going thru this....but it gets sooooo much better. I thought my world was ending when i threw my ex out, but in reality.....my world was just opening up for me. Hard times arent as hard, and the good times.....well they are so much sweeter...
I dont have any good advice on an amicable divorce, mine was any and everything BUT amicable.....
BUT if you ever need advice on how to get through a long, ugly, nasty, drawn out, expensive one.....then i am your woman....lolllll
Kisses....
Michele

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Michele

start pre-op diet...254
GP on 5/1/08.......240
as of 5/16/08.......224
as of 6/27/08.......204
as of 7/14/08.......198....I did it !!! ONEDERLAND BABY
as of 9/26/08.......173
as of 10/23/08.....164....thats 90 pounds!! huh?? wut??
as of 11/21/08.....157....My BMI is now NORMAL!!!!

TT gym rat #116

BabyNicole

I'm glad you are doing what is best for you.
Sending you some

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Nicole
Surgery Date (Lap RNY)-06/23/08
Onederland-07/29/08
Lost half of my desired weight loss: 9/20/08
Height: 5'3"
My Weight Loss Graph

Godsblessedme

my poor baby turns 6 this Sunday. He's still so mad and angry and sad. he acts out alot and says its cause he misses his daddy. My 3 year old misses him too but they see him everyother weekend. And my 15year old doesnt like him so shes great

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Deborah
Highest weight 268
Surgery Date: 12/18/07 Lap RNY
Down 84 Pounds (11/26/08)

soon2bthin

Deb, no divorce advice here, but I just wanted you to know that I am glad you are going through with it. Once a snake always a snake.

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Cassie

Preop/Current/Goal
252 / 147 / 137

Lap RNY 07/30/2007

Gall Bladder Removal 12/28/2007

Aggie

I went through a no-contest divorce in Texas and was able to do everything without a lawyer. It should not be that difficult since y'all are not contesting anything. I would recommend getting IN WRITING who pays for what debts (trust me you will appreciate this later) and find out if the judge presiding over your case will require you both to take a parenting education class. I wasn't aware that my particular judge required it and it held things up for about a month.

Good luck and best wishes on a speedy divorce!

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Aggie aka YogiBear
6/27/06
Doctor's Hospital, Dallas
Dr. Raeann Capehart

TT Gym rat club member #112

Who I am right now is better than who I have been.

Jazz

Deb:

Sorry to hear you are going to be going through a divorce. My divorce was the hardest thing I have done in my life so far. I hired the attorney and we split the costs. I have a 9 and 7 yo and the first year was hard on them, but I stayed strong and together for them. It will be hard and sad, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I did find prozac made the whole process easier. Best wishes to you. Take care of yourself, because your children will need you more now then before.


JAZZ

Josephine

Deb, as an ex child support enforcement officer, I'd say put everything laid out perfectly so you don't have to pay to have it modified later especially since your oldest is already 15. You don't wanna have to take him back to court in 3 years and pay for it again.

So something like..

"He will pay $300 per month for the 3 children beginning 8/01/2008. At the time that X child turns 18 or graduates high school, whichever comes last, the amount will be adjusted to $275 per month for the remaining 2 children. At the time Y child emancipates, the amount will be adjusted to $250 per month for the remaining child. The $300 is based on 25% of the father's take home pay. If he changes jobs resulting in an increase in pay, the defendant will be required to adjust the child support amount to a total of 25% of his take home pay. At no time, whether employed or not, is the defendant to lower his monthly child support obligation without decree from this court, even if the children are in his temporary care. The defendant is to notify the plaintiff within 30 days of change in employment affecting his pay.
The defendant is to carry the minor children on his insurance if his employer offers it at reasonable cost. Reasonable cost is determined to be anything less than 20% of the defendants gross pay. Additionally he is to cover 50% of all unpaid medical bills which do not fall under his insurance coverage.
At this time the defendant has been paying child support to the plaintiff since their seperation in February and currently owes $0 in child support arrears as of 7/27/2008."

Language like this is essential to ensure you don't have to go back to court to change things later. Beginning date is ESSENTIAL!!! Without it they go by the filemark date and they won't filemark it til you PAY the costs of filing so don't screw yourself out of $$! Of course my figures are just an example cause I don't know what he makes or what the child support guidelines are there in Az but I bet you it's pretty damn close. From what I remember the government enforcement offices in Arizona are some of the WORST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in the country. Do yourself a big favor and get this language perfect in your order and keep a good relationship with him so he doesn't fuck things up and make you rely on child support enforcement. They are so short staffed and underpaid in Arizona. Good luck hon.

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Lap Band 09/13/2004. Did not receive any proper aftercare.
Current status: Losing weight on my own, without restriction.
On surgeon's GBS waiting list - approximate wait 10 months - April or May 2009.

Start: 334
Current: 318
Goal: 175

Official Scale Whore #18!
Gym Rat # 110!

mistymee

In MA, if the children are in college, CS can continue... along with keeping the kids on insurance. I'd have something in the language to address that should any of them continue their educations after HS.

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Puddin

Your county has an online system. I just googled it. Check this site out. It looks like you can get all the forms online.
Family Court