TOTALLY OT... Am I crazy, or just losing it? - ThinnerTimes

Cinerbelle · 05-31-2008, 10:09 PM

Some of you know that my Dad passed away on Thursday as I put it in my Thread "Cindys Diary".

Here is where I might be losing it....

I always thought because my Dad and I were close that he would come to me in a dream very shortly after passing away. I went to sleep Thursday night fully expecting him to be there... but he wasn't. Hey, maybe he was going through orientation and couldn't make it...but nothing last night either. I also always thought that if he didn't come in a dream that he would give me some "sign" after passing away... and I haven't seen one. Am I losing it or what!

OOOOh and if any of you are wondering where I came up with the crazy dream theory, my Grandmother makes "visits" to me every so often this way. I know it could just be my sub-conscious, but I don't think so... the things she says wouldn't be things I could come up with! I know, crazy again.

UPDATE 6-30-08:

I might be crazy...but here's the latest scoop...

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Last Thursday I was sitting in my car by myself waiting for my Sister to meet me at a store and I wondered to myself if my Dad could hear me if I just started talking to him. So I said... "Dad, are you here...can you hear me"... I then went on to ask him if he thought something was funny that I had been recently saying about him (long story, but my Dad and I have the same sense of humor and I knew this tacky thing I was saying would make him laugh)...I went on to say that I wished he would give me a sign that he was okay...call me on my cell, make some light flicker...visit me in my dreams like Grandma had...anything, just give me a sign...

I woke up Sunday morning balling my eyes out. I didn't know that his sign was going to be such a strong one. I had a VERY REAL "dream" that I was driving down the street and I looked in my rearview mirror and saw someone sitting in the backseat (I was alone)...all I saw was hair, so I freaked out and jumped out of the car. When I looked back I saw my Dad in the back seat. I gave a sigh of relief and went back to the car, but my Dad was gone and my Grandfather was sitting there. I was VERY shocked because my Grandfather passed away when I was 12 and I have never been "visited" by him in a dream, just my maternal Grandmother. My Grandfather proceeded to tell me that my Father is just like he was while he was living....a home body, so he might not always be around, but no matter what he (my Dad) could hear me talking to him. I started to drive the car, but was having a hard time moving my body...my Grandfather took my hands and helped me to drive...all of a sudden my Grandfather was no longer in the car and I felt my Dads hands helping me to drive.

There were other little parts, but I can not remember all of it... I just know that my Dad did not say a word during the whole thing, but I saw him in the beginning and felt him in the end. I have gone over this dream a million times in my head and can not figure out why my Dad didn't talk and my Grandfather did all the talking. I feel like my Dad brought my Grandfather into the dream, but can't figure out why and why did he come 3 nights after me asking him to show me a sign... did it take him that long to talk Grandpa into coming???....has he not finished up oriention and doesn't know how to talk yet?? Also the fact that the "dream" was in the car when I had just asked him for a sign while sitting in my car made it even more real.

Any thoughts on my "visit"? I really feel like it is real and not a dream and then I think about it and think maybe I am crazy.....

Nyn · 05-31-2008, 10:25 PM

Cindy, I don't think you're crazy at all. But in my experience, these dreams come at the right time...which might not always be when WE think is the right time. My grandfather waited a year, and for me that was awesome because it had taken me time to fully accept the loss, mourn, and then I was ready to see him again and hear what he was saying. Maybe your dad knows that you have more do to and think about before you're ready? Or maybe he's still in Orientation (a thought which made me smile

) Maybe I'm crazy, but I hope this helps in some way...

BabyNicole · 05-31-2008, 10:34 PM

I truly believe people can visit you in your dreams, and I believe in dream analysis too. Now, since we dream very often at night and not only forget some of our dreams...could it be possible you did meet him, but don't remember the dream?

Sorry to hear about your dad.

JumboJulie · 05-31-2008, 10:41 PM

Orientation. He's still filling out those damn forrms to apply for his wings.

Seriously though ...
My Dad passed away 5 and a half years ago and he didn't 'visit' me for a long time. We were best friends, and I too thought I would be seeing more of him. I don't know, maybe he has really cool things to do now and I'm just no longer the center of his universe. But he does visit now and then ... last night in fact.
You're NOT crazy ... a man you loved dearly has left, and it's so fucking hard to accept. Trust me, your thoughts and feelings are very normal.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I know how rough it can be.

-Julie.

Lu Lu · 05-31-2008, 10:43 PM

I am very sorry about your Dad... and do not find it silly at all that you are looking for a sign from him. I cannot imagine my life without my parents and hope to hear from them from the other side!

Again... I am very sorry for your loss... hang onto the memories!!

Toony · 06-01-2008, 05:22 AM

Cindy girl... I'm SO SORRY to hear about your dad passing... HUGS HON!!!

My mom passed away a couple of months ago... and she has come to me in my dreams... It didn't happen right away - so don't worry about that. He's probably busy getting settled into his new cloud, which is his new home... and your mind is full of memories and grief right now...

It'll happen, I PROMISE!

Meanwhile, try journaling your thoughts... listen to music that reminds you of him (My mom has/had a huge collection of Big Band music from the 40's... I have thoroughly enjoyed listening to it)...

HUGS sweetie! Again, I'm so sorry to read of your loss!

katie

coptergirl · 06-01-2008, 05:25 AM

Your dad has completed his forms and is setting up and enjoying his new digs in heaven, and seeing your grandmother again - I am sure there is lots to catch up on..

Sometimes they come when you least expect it, hon. And sometimes they take a while - and even sometimes they only come when you need encouragement or wisdom during hard or rough times. He will come to you, i am sure, love.

I am so sorry for his passing - how did it go when you told the kids?

Mavisavis · 06-01-2008, 05:42 AM

Cindy......I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your Dad.

I also believe they can visit from "the other side". I forget why, but it seems in reading I came across an explanation of why it is difficult for them at first. My Grandma rarely comes anymore in dreams, but the entire family finds dimes constantly, and there is a song we always hear at just the right time. He'll come eventually. Also, maybe because you are so sure of where he is, and you guys had no unfinished business and such a great relationship, he has less need to prove anything to you.

Hope he comes soon!

paige52 · 06-01-2008, 05:46 AM

as someone already mentioned... the dreams are there when you are ready for them...

Cinder, I'm sorry to hear you lost your father. There are never words or gestures that help but know that you and you family are in my prayers as you go through the porcess of greiving a person you so obviously loved.

PJ

Duckie · 06-01-2008, 06:39 AM

Cin, I am SO SORRY for your loss. I didn't know. Please accept my sincere condolences. I am so sorry sweetie.