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03-15-2007, 01:47 PM
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#1 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005 |
Location: Rancho Cucamonga, Ca |
Surgeon: Dr. Suh |
Age: 50 |
Posts: 1,758 |
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ADULT Calorie Burning Chart
Removing Clothes Intensity Scale:
With Partner’s Consent: 12 calories
Without Partner’s Consent: 187 calories
Unhooking Bra:
Using two calm hands: 17
Using one trembling hand: 36
Earth moved: 30
Wrestling:
Dragging partner on floor: 16
Using skateboard: 3
Lifting partner: 15
Bird’s Sang:
Large birds: 7
Small birds: 3
Pulling Out:
After: 1.5
A few moments before: 500
Putting on condom:
With erection: 1.5
Without erection: 300
Inserting Diaphragm:
If woman who does it is experienced: 6
If woman does it is inexperienced: 73
If man does it: 680
(Add 5 calories for retrieving it from across the room.)
Side Effects:
Bouncing: 7
Sliding Around: 9
Serious skidding: 12
Whiplash: 27
Thanking partner quickly: 2
Getting Caught:
By partner’s spouse: 60
By your spouse: 100
Trying to explain: 55
Trying to remain calm: 100
Leaping out of bed: 75
Getting dressed in one motion: 500
__________________
Baron Patrick
It Ain't Over Till I Say It's Over-And I Won! 
___________________________
Top / Pre / Current / My Goal
280 / 263 / 190 / 180
LAP RNY 5/29/07
TT Gym Rat Club Member #19
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03-15-2007, 01:50 PM
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#2 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 |
Location: Northern Cailfornia |
Surgeon: Dr. IM Kaiser Permanente Richmond, CA |
Posts: 951 |
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Oh my heck I was laughing on that one. Woke my son up who is napping on the couch  Thanks for that laugh!
__________________
315/289/174
Highest/Surgery/Current
Surgery 2-28-07
Goal to just be overweight 190
Goal to be "normal" 155
Do I really want to be normal?? Having some body issues. Don't want to be too thin.
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03-15-2007, 01:51 PM
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#3 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2006 |
Location: Southern Alberta Windbowl |
Age: 35 |
Posts: 551 |
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LMAO!!!!! Too funny..... am going to send it to my hubby!!!!
Thanks for the laugh!
Lori
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03-15-2007, 02:14 PM
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#4 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005 |
Location: BC, Canada |
Surgeon: Dr. Nohr |
Age: 40 |
Posts: 4,577 |
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OMG.......will print for my hubby to take to work.....they will get a kick out of it!
Thanks
__________________
Lisa
aka....Canadian Bear and her Canadian Bear Cubs!
Open RNY - Jan 30, 2006
Tummy Tuck - June 4, 2007
314/ 152-157/180
start/ now/goal
BMI 45.7/22.1-24/26.2
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Century Club - Sept 12, 2006
Overweight Club - Oct 19, 2006
One-der-land - Nov 8, 2006
Below Goal - Jan 30, 2007 - Anniversary Date!
Holding Below Goal - 2 year surgery anniversary!
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03-15-2007, 02:57 PM
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#5 (permalink)
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2007 |
Location: New Jersey |
Surgeon: Dr. Trivedi |
Age: 25 |
Posts: 57 |
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haaa thats great!!! thanx for the laugh deff passing this on!!!
-LoS
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03-15-2007, 03:01 PM
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#6 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006 |
Location: Rhode Island |
Surgeon: Dr. Harry Sax |
Age: 50 |
Posts: 1,678 |
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Patrick, where do you get these! You are too funny!
__________________
Cynthia
I live in my own little world, but it's okay because they know me here.
Height 5'2"
Highest: 335
Surgery:328.6
Current: 223.8 as of 7/1/08
Goal: Who cares? I feel great!
Surgery Date: 2/12/07
Open Roux-en-Y at The Miriam Hospital, RI
TT Gym Rat #11
PhoenixBear
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03-15-2007, 03:25 PM
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#7 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007 |
Location: Upstate NY |
Surgeon: Taewan Kim, Syracuse NY |
Age: 37 |
Posts: 3,030 |
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by CeeCee
Patrick, where do you get these! You are too funny!
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Duh Cee! THE JOKE FAIRY.... Geeps!
__________________
Jen 
367/325/227/180
Start/Day of Surgery/Current/Goal
July 9, 2007.. my re-birthday!
Century Club: November 17, 2007
140 Pounds Lost... I'm not Going to Miss them or even TRY to find them.. they can stay lost!! (And if you see them... RUN.. you dont want them either!)
"Life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you respond to it" ~~ Lou Holtz
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03-15-2007, 03:33 PM
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#8 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2006 |
Location: Red Deer, Alberta, Cananda |
Surgeon: Dr. Nohr, Medicine Hat, Alberta, Canada |
Age: 34 |
Posts: 2,151 |
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by JenBear7
Duh Cee! THE JOKE FAIRY.... Geeps!
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omg first patrick cracked me up now you, great thread thanks
__________________
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Carrie
Open RNY - Sept. 11, 2006
5'3" Start 239 / Current 118
One-der-land Club October 1, 2006
Over-weight Club December 13, 2006
Doctor's goal: 140lbs March 23, 2007
Open Gallbladder Surgery: August 13, 2007
TT Gym rat club member #4
Current: 16% BF
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03-15-2007, 03:41 PM
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#9 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007 |
Location: Upstate NY |
Surgeon: Taewan Kim, Syracuse NY |
Age: 37 |
Posts: 3,030 |
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by chilmoe
omg first patrick cracked me up now you, great thread thanks
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They havent heard nothing.. til they have you read this over the phone to them lol.. in that voice.. .. *laughs*..
MUAHHH
__________________
Jen
367/325/227/180
Start/Day of Surgery/Current/Goal
July 9, 2007.. my re-birthday!
Century Club: November 17, 2007
140 Pounds Lost... I'm not Going to Miss them or even TRY to find them.. they can stay lost!! (And if you see them... RUN.. you dont want them either!)
"Life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you respond to it" ~~ Lou Holtz
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03-15-2007, 03:45 PM
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#10 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2006 |
Location: Red Deer, Alberta, Cananda |
Surgeon: Dr. Nohr, Medicine Hat, Alberta, Canada |
Age: 34 |
Posts: 2,151 |
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by JenBear7
They havent heard nothing.. til they have you read this over the phone to them lol.. in that voice.. .. *laughs*..
MUAHHH
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whats wrong with my voice?
__________________
_________________________
Carrie
Open RNY - Sept. 11, 2006
5'3" Start 239 / Current 118
One-der-land Club October 1, 2006
Over-weight Club December 13, 2006
Doctor's goal: 140lbs March 23, 2007
Open Gallbladder Surgery: August 13, 2007
TT Gym rat club member #4
Current: 16% BF
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