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About Aksh

  • Rank
    Advanced Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Location
  • Age


  • Height (ft-in)
  • Start Weight
  • Current Weight
  • Goal Weight
  • Surgery Date
  • Surgery Type
    Gastric Bypass
  • Surgeon
    Dr. Lakdawalla (Mumbai)
  1. Totally true @CurvyMermaid - like an AA or NA or such, it's a unique thing to be able to share with people who literally know what you've been and where you've been and how you've felt. No matter how much empathy or understanding another person in your life has had, unless they've been through the highs and lows, 99% of the time I don't believe that they can ever truly understand what you as the "addict" are going through. It's like, my folks who turned 60 this past year and my sister who's 6 years younger than me - they were always in good shape/"healthy". My mom and dad started putting on some weight and are both a little on the fatter side but that happened post-50 and my sister has always been thin and is super-healthy for many years now. While I KNOW they feel for me and my folks are sort-of seeing and struggling with being overweight and unhappy about it - I don't find that they can comprehend, not really comprehend, what it is to see yourself as nothing but fat and as a fatty/obese person first and foremost and to be like that from a young age and what that means in terms of (a) how people treat you and (b) what socio-cultural things in this regard do to your very mind and core. I could go on about this for ages, but I won't. The above is the nutshell, but since I kind of want to share, I'm linking this post I wrote about being an over-weight person that I'm gonna share here for anyone who's interested: https://anansisweb.wordpress.com/2014/10/27/thin-vs-fat-harsh-truths/ And THANK YOU! To everyone here at TTF, you guys don't know what it's meant to me to have this place to come and both talk and listen. Cheers.
  2. I'm quoting this again just for sheer truth. Truly well said.
  3. You can't tell but I'm blushing...
  4. I have to say that what you said about the quantity of food regardless of type... it hit home, it was literally like you took the words and food right out of my mouth! I remember ordering a pizza and garlic bread at one time and eating the whole lot all by myself and still being capable of eating more... I remember eating a whole big bag of chips at night at one point on a regular basis.. I even remember at the "healthier" points when I was as you described, eating a whole load of dry fruits because it was healthier than a bag of chips of biscuits/cookies and hating myself for it every damn time. People don't get it when I say it to them (people who've not been overweight until post 40 anyway...) but to my mind it was like I was a junkie and in a sense I'm now in recovery and trying to stay sober.
  5. I think the chewiness will help because white rice and reg wheat are softer and with a chewier grain it will be more conducive to checking the hell out of the food properly as Im supposed to anyway - I try and make it a point to remember to do that but it's not always easy. Thing is I don't know if I should limit carbs anymore because it's so limited anyway and at this point limiting will be pretty much cutting it out except for a little perhaps every other day. Maybe I'll try that and see if it makes a difference but I think it's just my body taking a break to re-adjust after the last adjustment
  6. I completely agree with you - it's very screwed up. But I'm grateful to my parents and my sister for just this reason: They supported me and were with me from the moment the surgery became a real consideration and have been nothing but helpful and supportive since. In fact I think they're more protective of me keeping the stigma in mind than even I am at this point. Had they not been as they are, I think this would have been infinitely harder - more so because Im a single person so don't even have a wife who can support me and my extended family is not exactly the most supportive and gentle in their manner. It amazes me even now how little people realise the extent to which even casually made comments can hurt.
  7. Interesting topic. It's something I've been sort of thinking about for a bit since just a bit pre-op and definitely post-op - but more in the vein of noticing obesity much more and in a small way, being just a tad critical. Not of the people per-se but of a system/culture/whatever where someone can become like that. Much like me and a few other folks I know, the emotional baggage/reasons, the terrible lifestyle of work+bad eating+low activity and all that fosters poor health, the derogatory way that people can be treated for the way they look that exacerbates bad life choices more often than not and the stigma and casual way in which a not even obese but just slightly fat or even stout person can be treated. And most of all it bothers me that there is a certain stigma to WLS which clearly makes a tremendous difference to a person physically and mentally and while it has its downsides/risks, compared to what an obese person is facing in the long run, it makes no sense to me now having dived head-first into this world and learned about it that it is still looked at poorly. I don't know about the US/Europe but around here it definitely is not unlike when someone has a mental problem like depression or anxiety or something and people look at you weird for no logical reason and treat you differently and are even more painfully awkward about it if you're getting treatment from a professional and even more still if you're open about the fact. People are weird. But I will say, that as an overweight person, when I interact with friends or people I know that are overweight - now I have to catch myself not to get into a lecture about WLS beyond any questions they might have, because (a) I remember that in a way we fat folk have an unspoken rule to not blab too much about diets and things and push others to do it because that's what everyone else does to them which makes them feel bad and (b) I remember the hesitations and worries and self-doubts and appreciate if they want to ask at their own pace and don't want to push, so I'm staying open about it and with the passage of time, different folk are talking to me about it at their own respective paces and I want to respect that. ...wow, I have got to learn to be more concise...
  8. I guess I'm too far away from being that thin (for now) so it doesn't sound that bad - but part of me gets how it could be annoying.
  9. Never had that kind of acne issue (thankfully) and none of that so far - though yes there is some odd spot on the face but thats also because of the terrible heat and humidity here these days making everything greasy, dirty and oil... For the face and all at least, I use a topical called Clinda-M which is very effective but don't know how well it'll work on your back.
  10. Well I lost a HUGE chunk right after surgery but as I started to get to more solid/normal foods it slowed a little and this past week has somewhat stalled. Which I think is basically fine because honestly I think the body can only take so much at a time without suffering problems and as Im back to having regular daily activity at least 4-5 days a week while maintaining a relatively healthy but normal diet and smaller portions, it should kick back in soon enough. I'm not trying to cut down to super-healthy eating either because in the long run I want to be able to eat some semblence of normal foods which at home are by themselves not unhealthy - I just don't eat the giant platefuls and seconds anymore, instead opting for using a quarter plate only and more often than not, just one serving that fits within that plate is enough to make me feel full and satisfied. Fried food is still a little uncomfortable. Doesn't make me sick or anything, but the one attempt just felt super-heavy so I'll wait a bit longer before even trying a bit again. @Aussie H - I know what you mean about undernourishment being a concern. With that in mind I try and eat a mix of vegetables and protiens at every single meal, though for now it's more protiens than veggies because my body needs it as it's still not 100% I think plus getting back to physical activity and pushing myself is straining on the muscles (I can feel it when I swim) and I think they'll need the protein and nutrients as well. What IS now just a fractional part of my diet - not gone but just barely 10/20% of what I consume are carbs. Rice or wheat, I have so little now and at times I remind myself to have some because some carbs are good for ones health. I am thinking of switching grains and trying out things like quinoa and ragi and rye and other grains instead. Let's see.
  11. Best of luck for your labs @annegirl
  12. Also, in happy news, I went swimming yesterday and though I'm clearly out of shape compared to when I last swam like a year ago - IT FELT AWESOME! And now I can't wait to make it a regular part of my weekly exercise.
  13. @Cheesehead I thought that too but then realised that's not just it because sometimes that happens within the first 2 bites/teaspoons of what I'm eating when Ive not eaten since my last meal/snack/whatever and made it a point to have no water 20-30 minutes prior. I feel like maybe it's a speed of eating thing or not enough chewing or something. Because if I wait about 5 minutes, it passes and then I can go ahead and eat my meal. Funny. It's I think kind of like what @cinwa describes. ALSO, it seems to happen with denser/dryer foods but hilariously it happened to me with chicken and not with red meat.
  14. Well I'm about 5 weeks+ out of surgery, done with the semi-solids thing and so far so good! Weights gone down dramatically at the start but more gradual since - which is probably good. BUT on the plus side I've started on solids, and in fact I was super excited because I went out for dinner day before yesterday and at 2 taquitos (they're pretty small at this place, each round taco is about the size of your palm at most) with chorizo which I love and I managed to eat is slowly but have my fill and not feel ill or anything. I have had the odd meal where for some reason 1 or 2 bites in I feel this heaviness just around where I feel my stomach is like... I don't know, like sort of when you've eaten waaaaay too much and you're filled up too much - you know? First time I thought maybe I needed to throw up but nope, nothing. I'd keep getting these teeny tiny almost imperceptible burps and I realised by the 2nd time that if I just give it like 5-10 minutes, it passes and thereafter I can eat my meal perfectly normally. Very strange - has this happened to anyone else? Maybe I ate too fast or something, been trying to pay attention. Let's see.