Reasons Why it’s Great to be a Woman
You can always get a job in a movie, so long as you're willing to go naked.
It is socially acceptable for you to ask someone else to carry all your bags
when you're on vacation.
It is acceptable for you to know everything about your friends' sex lives.
You get to team up when using the bathroom and no one thinks you're gay.
You can let someone else open all your jars.
You can blame water retention every time you put on a pound or two.
You have the power to stop clicking the remote control.
There's no such thing as a beer gut.
People are scared to criticize your work for fear of your reaction.
You never have to change the oil.
You can be "fashionably late" and no one faults you.
Sex only enhances your reputation.
"Forgetting to invite" someone to something is one of your best revenge tactics.
You can wear see through underwear and people think its cool.
It’s okay if you take the elevator one floor down.
Crying gets you out of any stressful situation.
Hair does not grow out of your ears.
You have the secret power to somehow hold back a fart in public.
You think being able to drive and apply makeup should be an Olympic event.
Three words have the power to get you out of any difficult situation: Pre Menstrual Syndrome.
You can get any man to do what you want.
Flowers make everything wrong with the world right again.
You can know nothing about cars and people don't think you're gay.
You can become instantly famous simply by wearing a T-shirt to a water park.
You have the power to instantly change your mood by the act of buying a new pair of shoes.
You can accidentally go into the wrong bathroom and no one will yell at you.
You can't get sued for telling a dirty joke.
Watching construction workers from an office window is considered recreation.
You don’t have skid marks on your underwear.
You have an average life span that is four years longer than men.
You never have to change a flat tire in the rain.
You can't get thrown in jail when you miss a month of child support.
Your bathrooms always qualify for Better Homes and Gardens.
You'll never get drafted and told to go to some jungle or desert where people are shooting at you.
People don't think anything of it when you choose from one of twelve moods you would like to display at any given moment.
You can ask directions at any gas station and no one thinks you're gay.
You have a valid excuse to leave work if you have a run in your stocking.
You don't have to mow the lawn.
You can manage to do a load of laundry without your underwear turning pink.
You don't have to wear ties.
You don't have to "jiggle" when you're done using the john.
You can go without shaving for days at a time and no one notices.
You don't have to worry about catching any major organs in zippers.
You have an 80% greater chance of getting out of traffic tickets.
Getting really turned on doesn't preclude you from standing up in public.
You and your dad always get along.
You don't have to worry when the cashier calls for a price check on tampons when you're standing in line at the checkout.
You always have the "freshening up" card at your disposal when a situation gets tense.
You can get into a catfight and everyone thinks its cool.
You can ask members of the same sex how your butt looks and no one thinks you're gay.
No one thinks anything of it when you don't call a guy the day after the first date.
You never had to miss a sexual opportunity because you couldn't perform.
You can bump into someone at work and not get sued.
People don't question your womanhood if you can't get your car to run.
Size doesn't matter.
You don't have to worry about getting punched when you cut someone off in traffic
If you feel like trapping your husband, there's always the "do I look fat?" test.
http://home.pon.net/hunnicutt/misc_MW.htm 
More funny stuff at that link