Panic Attack - ThinnerTimes

happiness101 · 04-24-2008, 08:14 PM

I'm sure this is natural but it really freaked me out and has me questioning EVERYTHING about the surgery. Any feedback would be so appreciated.

I'm scheduled for LGB surgery on May 8th. After leaving my psych eval (where all went well - no stress) I got on the elevator and the thought that I was going to die hit me hard. All I could think was that my son (10 and mildly disabled) would not survive without me. I started feeling guilty for even considering surgery and by the time the elevator hit my floor I was an emotional wreck. I eventually talked myself "off the ledge" but I still have flash backs to how devastating the feeling was. I have four children and I can't quit beating myself up for even considering this path. My husband is very supportive and has pointed out that I am not in a very high risk category (38 and no serious co-moridities). My surgeon echoed this sentiment when I talked to him about my fears. He says this is normal and I'm sure it is but I am still torn up with guilt. I spent hours looking up mortality statistics surrounding the surgery and so I have a very clear idea - and have pretty much convinced myself - that death is not around the corner. But the guilt is still overwhelming at times. Someone please tell me that I'll still be a good mother (maybe even better?) and that my family will not suffer (providing I don't die) from this decision. I'd like to hear from anyone who can relate. Thank you.

AnnieH · 04-24-2008, 11:33 PM

I can relate!! My surgery is on May 6th and while I'm not a mother yet - I have had my share of panic moments! You need to remember why you ARE doign this and not focus on the reasons why you shouldn't. Yes, there are risks, but the odds are greatly in our favor! I dont know what the stats are in USA but in South Africa the surgery has a 99.8% success rate - there is more risk to get into your car than to die having this surgery. Remind yourself how the quality of your life will improve - not only physically, but emotionally. You will have more confidence, better self esteem -and that alone will make you a better mother! And, chances are, if you dont have the surgery your weight will escalate and you will pick up some health issues sooner or later.

We're right around the corner from our new lives - hang in there and keep asking questions. Come to this forum and speak about every tiny little doubt or question you may have. This is wht this family is all about.
And at the end of the day, whether you go through with the surgery or not, YOU and YOU alone have to be okay with your decision.

Lots of love to you!!!

An

SDeRossett · 04-25-2008, 02:05 AM

Fear is a very natural reaction. Let me say this, a good mom? Of course you are, and by having the surgery you will within a year lose so much weight and be able to run and play with your children, live long enough to see grandchildren and your quality of life will greatly improve in sooo many areas. The first year is tough. I won't beat around the bush on that, but once you get through that first year things level out and get back to a more "normal" pace. During the first year there are lots of things going on. You will be on an emotinoal rollercoaster for a little while after you have the surgery. I read that it's from the hormones that are stored in the fat cells being released as we lose weight, but remember, there is a huge group of people all with different experiences who can relate and are always here to listen, comfort and answer questions. I wish you the best of luck in what ever your decision may be. Remember this is YOUR life and YOUR decision. You are the one who has to make this decision, no one else.

Sharon

jannie · 04-25-2008, 04:29 AM

I asked yesterday for some feedback. I am truley terrified. I too have a slightly disabled son of 15. He to is scared for me. Over in the US you seem to have much better support network than here. I feel very alone. I dont think we are bad mothers for wanting this done. One of the reasons I am having this is so I get healthier. That way I get to be alive longer to spend with him. I think we are both very brave people who are just scared of the unknown.

AnnieH · 04-25-2008, 04:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jannie

I asked yesterday for some feedback. I am truley terrified. I too have a slightly disabled son of 15. He to is scared for me. Over in the US you seem to have much better support network than here. I feel very alone. I dont think we are bad mothers for wanting this done. One of the reasons I am having this is so I get healthier. That way I get to be alive longer to spend with him. I think we are both very brave people who are just scared of the unknown.

Where are you jannie? There are people here from all over Europe too - I'm sure we can help you find a support group of some sort? In South Africa there is also very little support (and knowledge) about this so I know what's it's like to feel isolated and scared. TT is a great place for support though even if it is in cyberspace.
When is your surgery?

happiness101 · 04-26-2008, 05:30 PM

I offer a big "thank you!" to those who responded. I'm feeling much better and even though I'm sure there will be more 'panic minutes' in the near future I know that can get through this.