telling people - ThinnerTimes

BabyJane · 02-18-2008, 10:41 AM

I'm curious about how others deal with telling people about having WLS. My family and close friends all know that I'm about to have a gastric bypass, but I don't feel as comfortable talking about it with others.
Unfortunately for me, I'm not getting to decide who I discuss it with and who I don't, because I am sort of going through the process with a close co-worker who is getting the Lap Band. She talks about "our surgeries" with anyone and everyone and freely shares details about me every time she discusses her surgery with someone. I know she doesn't mean any harm by it and she does so because she is a very....hmmmm what's the word

open book kind of person? I would like to tell her to stop doing this and let me tell who I want to tell, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. Any suggestions?

taydavreg · 02-18-2008, 10:48 AM

to be honest, i felt the same way as you. it is such a personal decision and i am almost embarrassed and feel like a failure that i couldnt do it on my own. when i talked about it i felt like it was awful that i am so out of control that i have to have someone go in and make my stomach fuller so i can push away from the table. then i realized that people i see all the time are gonna know anyway. common sense will tell them that i have been getting bigger the past several years they worked with me then all the sudden i lost 100 pounds. so i started telling a few people just because i needed some supporting words. i got what i needed from everyone i told so it was good. you have to be able to say hey i dont care what anyone thinks about me!

BabyJane · 02-18-2008, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taydavreg

to be honest, i felt the same way as you. it is such a personal decision and i am almost embarrassed and feel like a failure that i couldnt do it on my own.

Yep that pretty much sums up how I feel.

Quote:

you have to be able to say hey i dont care what anyone thinks about me

I'm working on that.

'thann · 02-18-2008, 02:05 PM

I'm still waiting for my date, but I've pondered this question. At the moment, only my husband, my son, my son's girlfriend, and a former coworker know. All of my siblings live out of town, and I don't want to tell them for the following reasons:

I don't want to alarm them, and have them rushing into town to "be at my side"!
I don't want any of them to try to talk me out of this (not that they would be able to, but at least two will try).
I sort of want the next time they see me to see the look of utter shock on their faces when they see how much weight I've lost! (purely selfish, I know)

I will tell my fellow choir members and music director, but not until the date is imminent.

I am really funny about being the center of attention -- I don't want people dropping in to see how I am, or even bringing meals on wheels. I am a very, very private person and want complete control over who shows up at my door!

I am not at all embarrassed about the prospect of GBS, and after it's over and I'm back to doing things I normally do (mostly church stuff), I'll happily discuss it with anyone. I just do NOT want people fauning over me before, during, and right after surgery. My husband and son are consolation enough.

'thann

Gwen · 02-18-2008, 02:38 PM

..... here are a couple of Threads for you to read:

Cape Town Chick

Did any of you have a hard time telling some family members?

I am trying to find some more threads I'm sure there was one where Claire (CareBear) had a stunning way of telling people but can't find it.

XXX