The Bear Rants - ThinnerTimes

bigbearjeff · 08-31-2007, 10:48 AM

Well, time for the big bear to rant….

First, let me talk about me. You remember me? The universe revolves around me? (Just kidding of course)

I am a tall man standing at 6’ 4” built like a football player. I currently weigh around 329. Maybe less due to the required low carb diet I am on. Now a few comments about me size. Many people look at me and say “You don’t look like you need to lose that much blah blah blah”. Quite honestly this is not a cosmetic thing for me. It is about my health, but for some reason people just don’t understand that. It gets so old with me. I am one of those guys who carries his weight VERY well… more like exceptionally well. Let me “rephrase” that so everyone understands. I am one of those people whose body HIDES the weight very well. I have MASSIVE, not big, not large, but massive shoulders and a small waist. I did not say large muscled or any of that, I am honestly a very big boned man. Case in point, I have to special order sunglasses because my skull is so thick. Sucks to be me. Buying shoes sucks. Buying long sleeved shirts is a joke. There are so many to choose from that are 37 ½” long. All of this came from a skinny father that was 5’ 10” and a 4’10” little mother. Go figure?

But back to it..

As the world looks at me I do not appear like a “Morbidly Obese man”, but I am. BMI and co-morbidities profess the truth of the matter. In addition, my knees, hips, and joints remind me EVERYDAY how big I am. As a tall person, it is that much harder on my heart. Coupled with the extra weight it is a recipe for an early death. To be honest, I did not want to face this issue at the age of 55 with another 75-100 lbs on me. I would rather address it now, then wait to later.

I want to smack people that say stupid things like “You are taking the easy way out”. I see NOTHING easy about this. Getting my digestive system completely re-routed coupled with stringent eating requirements with a much higher focus on nutrition. Yeah that sounds really easy? I am sure some of it is fueled by jealousy, envy or whatever.

It gets more aggravating when people say,” If you just dieted and worked out more… “. They obviously do not understand how many times I have dropped a bunch of weight only to regain it over the long haul.

I remember losing 86lbs. I got down to 235lbs. At 6’ 4” 235lbs I felt and looked so good. It was so nice not to feel like I was carrying this 100lb person on my back when I walked across the room, but more so... I could for the first time purchase regular men’s clothes. I went into the changing room, put on a pair of size 36 jeans and they fit me loose. I fell apart in there and cried. It was overwhelming. That was achieved with the aid of Phin Phen. Oh, I could have been a spokesperson for those medications, but alas.. They are off the market, and honestly I hated the idea of taking drugs like that everyday.

I saw Tony Orlando on The Morning show this morning. He has dropped 100lbs with Nutrisystems. I wish him the best keeping it off, but if the statistics are right then he most likely will not. I hate sounding negative about other "weight-loss" options, but we all know that without a lifestyle change it really is impossible to lose and stay at a healthy weight.

Well, either way, I sit here waiting to hear back from my doctor’s office for a scheduled date. Tom Petty was right, “The waiting is the hardest part”

All the best,

Jeff

Toony · 08-31-2007, 11:44 AM

Jeff's No 1 Fan Jumping In!

Excellent post, as always. Sometimes I think the general public (co-workers, neighbors, family)... don't want us to succeed... They don't want us looking/feeling better than them!

No one in their right mind would even consider this surgery if not for failures in the past --- and "invisible" problems (bad knees, blood sugars creeping up, fatigue, etc). We are not idiots looking for a quick and easy and sure-fired cure. We've done our homework, we've made a committment and we're doing what we need to do!

Jeff - you are the size my DH was about 10 yrs ago... since then he's had 3 spine surgeries (testing for the 4th right now), bones fused in his foot that won't heal (it's been 2 yrs), sleeps with two machines (bi-pap & oxygen), he's in chronic pain.... ****IF**** he'd done something about his weight back then, maybe he'd be able to work, take vacations, stay awake for more than 3 hours at a time... to say nothing of being a happier person! Oh, and now - he's over 400 pounds

He has wayyyy too many problems to even consider WLS... not an option for him... Seeing what he's been through - I just can't NOT do something NOW!!!

Love ya Jeff... keep posting!

Toony

Polly D · 08-31-2007, 11:54 AM

* nudging Toony out of the way *

No, *I* am his number one fan

Anyway. I alternate in my plans not to tell people about it, to telling them to do their research and then come back to it, or tell them to walk a mile in my moccassins, or just snap that they don't know what they're talking about and their filter needs a tune up.

LisaM · 08-31-2007, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigbearjeff

I hate sounding negative about other "weight-loss" options, but we all know that without a lifestyle change it really is impossible to lose and stay at a healthy weight.

Glad to see you getting a little ticked off, buddy. Sometimes those of us with a funny bone lose sight of the fact that this ain't always funny...

My only argument with your letter is borne out by the stats. Call it whatever you want, diet, lifestyle change, deprivation, beating your head up against a wall... bottom line is, 98% of the people who try to lose weight not only eventually fail, but end up heavier than when they started. So far, WLS is the only effective solution for losing weight permanently. This is what makes me SO angry about the diet drugs. Any other product that had a 98% failure rate would be taken off the market, and the maker would be up on fraud charges. Heck, even the weatherman averages being right 12% of the time!

OsoDelDesierto · 08-31-2007, 12:51 PM

Jeff, I am in total agreement - I may not qualify as your #1, but I am definitely a fan of your posts and find a lot to identify with. I wish that I had been successful at turning my weight back before it got to this point, but every "successful" diet succeeded only in a greater regain, which is why I made the decision to have WLS. Doing something to help yourself while you only have 100 pounds to lose instead of 200 or 300 is very wise, and I wish you all the best.

As far as my "taking the easy way out" (which, fortunately, no one has accused me of - everyone in my life has been supportive of this decision), I'm not sure what more I could have done - Adkins? Sure, did it three times -went from 405 to 340 in a few months the first time, then ballooned to 496 in less than a year after adding back the carbs. Weight Watchers? Sure, did it four times - lost 110 pounds one time and gained it all back. Scarsdale? Yep. Dr. Phil? Check. Dr. Andrew Weil? You got it. Self-hypnosis? Mmmm hmmm. Cutting calories? Yes, tried that many times. Exercising more? Of course, even that. Gym memberships? Sure. Personal trainers? Mais oui. Always lost a LOT of weight, regardless of the technique, then put more back on. How much more time, money, and effort does some fool think I need to put in before I have exhausted all other options? If WLS is the easy way out, then I've paid my dues and I've earned it.

As far as carrying weight well, I can identify with that too - there aren't a lot of 453.4 pound (as of 8/17/07) men who get around as well as I do, or look as good, all modesty aside. Many people at my weight are in wheelchairs. I looked and felt my best for years around 200 pounds (most people thought I was too thin, but I liked it), but got away for years with my weight spiraling upward because I'm 6'4" with a big frame (size 16 shoes) and could carry it unobtrusively. It wasn't until I hit the mid-300s that my blood pressure went any higher than 120/80, and I was still able to travel and walk great distances in Las Vegas and New Orleans seven years ago, while my weight was in the high 300s/low 400s. But, age and increasing weight do take their toll, and when I hit 540 around the time of my 40th birthday, I was in BAD shape, physically and emotionally - osteoarthritis, severe sleep apnea, hypertension, lymphedema, tremendous fatigue, you name it. That was when my PCP first suggested WLS, but I still wasn't ready - I still thought I could do it on my own. Now I finally am ready and I'm doing this for myself - it's that simple.

Keep the posts coming as you journey toward better health, my friend!

Toony · 08-31-2007, 01:02 PM

Hi Eric... I enjoy your posts too... and this was a good one.

Where are you now in the journey? I know you had to find a new surgeon because your old one decided not to do RNY anymore... just waiting for Insurance??? doesn't seem like it should take so long to get approval since they had done it once already! You are SO PATIENT!!! I'd be climbing the walls by now...

Keep on track... Toony!

paige52 · 08-31-2007, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigbearjeff

I remember losing 86lbs. I got down to 235lbs. At 6’ 4” 235lbs I felt and looked so good. I saw Tony Orlando on The Morning show this morning. He has dropped 100lbs with Nutrisystems. I wish him the best keeping it off, but if the statistics are right then he most likely will not. I hate sounding negative about other "weight-loss" options, but we all know that without a lifestyle change it really is impossible to lose and stay at a healthy weight.

Do you know the statistics for weight regain after this surgery?

Your pouch will stretch, it happens to everyone. You will be able to consume more food, more liquids eventually so then what?

I hear what you are saying and yes this will help you for the first year but then what? What lifestyle changes are you making? Have you educated yourself about food yet? Recognized the food issues you have so you don't stumble down that path again?

Because the one common factor in all your diet/food plans is *you* and you are taking yourself into this one as well.... so what are you doing different to assure yoruself that 2 years from now you aren't asking your surgeon for a revision becasue you gained all your weight back?

Getting your inside rerouted isnt' a "life-style" change it's forced behavior modification and when the "forced" part has stopped working what is the life style change you are going to have in place to counter it?

Sorry this isn't the warm fuzzy version of support but dont' fool yourself into thinking this surgery is the end all solution to the weight loss/gain battle you've been fighting for years. It's just a tool that you have to utilize......

LyndasRoom · 08-31-2007, 01:55 PM

So true,
" They obviously do not understand how many times I have dropped a bunch of weight only to regain it over the long haul."

and don't you hate the way when those pounds come back they have the f'n nerve to bring FRIENDS?????

bigbearjeff · 08-31-2007, 03:16 PM

I was thinking about Paige's posting. I am sure it is NOT an easy ride, I am sure it is going to take a tremendous amount of effort. I also realize that the real success depends on me making the right decisions forever. Not for a year, or a month, or a week.

I have survived a great deal in this life, and I am confident I will not only survive this, but will maintain great success. So, I appreciate that brutal honesty of it, because it is not all butterfly kisses and happy rainbows. It is a chance for a new beginning with a new ending. The ending is what I am looking for. I want a longer healthier life with my family.

I know a few people that have had this surgery. I was amazed at their initial weight loss, but I watched them. Not that I wanted to see them fail. I wanted to see how different their lives were. Some have not veered from the path, and are pillars in the GB community.. They have been honest with me about the good and the bad. It seems the most successful stick to a solid routine. Not only do they look different, they actually are different. Their health becomes MUCH more important to them. I think that is a good quality as it is important to me as well.

I have seen people stray far from what I have read “Life after GB” is supposed to be like. I am sure 6 months out when you start having some kind of appetite, and 1 year out are going to be challenging, but I am going to do my best.

So we shall see. I appreciate your words Paige, because they are sound and wise. I can be very stern with my sons at time, but they know it is because I want the best for them and that I love them.

All the best,

Jeff

PS. Here is an interesting article about "statistics and GB" if anyone cares.

http://www.lowcarbing.com/wp/?p=112

paige52 · 08-31-2007, 05:04 PM

you hit the nail on the head.... thank you for heairng my words exactly as they are meant. To many times in life people soft pedaled their comments to me and I've learned that it really never is in my best interest.

However... yes I'm relentless.... what are you thinking is different this time? What concrete steps besides the obvious are you putting in place to be a winner or loser as the case may be?

May I suggest going on to a site like fitday.com and starting to log your food now on a daily basis. Learn what you are putting into your body. Start an excersize regimne now.... build your cardio up so you have more muscle to work for you during recovery, plus set up the daily habits that you will need for the rest of your life.

start taking those supplements now, get into the routine of taking care of your body. Try cutting out a food that you know is dangerous for you now, to practice self restraint. See how it makes you feel? Because I garantee you are goign to be mouring some of your old standby's, how emotionally healthy is it for you to know in advance and at least keep the mouring to a minimum...

Just thoughts.... you seem to be okay dude...