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Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 |
Location: Lexington, KY |
Age: 44 |
Posts: 169 |
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My "Post" pre-op testing thoughts..
Hi gang,
Well here we are again. Yesterday I went for a full day of tests. These started with the 2nd part of my Psychiatric exam. As some of you recall I had taken the written test where they worked hard to see if I was addicted to drugs or alcohol. Additionally, they asked me 5 different ways about whether I have considered suicide.
So yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting Dr. Brainfry. (Note the names and places are all ficticious. If they somewhat resemble someone you know.. then good! Welcome to my world!)
Now back to Dr. Brainfry. So I was instructed to take my designated driver with me because by the end of the day I would be in a drug induced state due to the EGD.. more about that later.
So I get there early because I hate to be late to things. I arrive in the waiting room, and there are about 6 people sitting around. This is the same waiting area for all of the weight loss patients. It is where they do the pre and post visits etc. It is a really nice office, and instead of having chairs, they have those extra wide seats. Those people that weight 110lbs and stand 5' 4" call them "Love seats", we the rest of us call them lovely! (made you smile!)
Either way, I am fascinated with people. I love to watch them. Of course being a man(no offense ladies), I am looking for anyone in the room I can relate to. The men are either much younger, much bigger, or whatever. I do notice one man about my size in the room. Here I am thinking, "Oh look that is me in 10 years". He was about my height and I was glad to see he was here for the same reason. Thank God I did not ask him about it, because just when I was about to talk to him his wife came out, and I realized he was there for her and not himself. Ooops!
Okay, so of course I have to wait for Dr. Brainfry to meet with everyone before me. By then my partner left to go have breakfast. I said goodbye and told him to enjoy the Breakfast boritos from McDonalds (yes, I will miss them). Oh did I mention no food or drink since midnight the night before. Now I can go without the food, but MAN I was thirsty. I would have been very naughty for a drink of water. (I saw that grin people!)
Okay, but really enough about the waiting room. The receptionist greeted me like she greeted the rest of the people that walked in "You look great!". I am like, "umm get a grip. I have not had the surgery yet, but well yeah.. I am sexy" (Just kidding folks!). As most of you know, this is not at all about what I look like. This is about my health, if fixing one helps the other then great, and if I look better... then well.. HELL YEAH! (*grin*)
Now back to Dr. Brainfry. Okay, let's make sure the cat is completely out of the bag on this one folks. Dave, my partner(not a business partner) leaves me as you recall to get breakfast and shop. So yes, that makes me gay.. or sexually challenged or whatever. But either way, getting that out of the way makes the next part of my journey even better...
Meeting Dr. Brainfry
So the 108lb receptionist comes to the door and calls my name and tells me "Dr. Brainfry" will see you now. Of course I am thinking... lovely. I walk into his office and hubba hubba, Dr Brainfry is Dr Couldyoubeanybetterlooking? (BINGO! I win!) So either way, on top of his handsomeness, he was polite, but we all know that it is all a ploy to find the crazy person inside me that forces me to overeat or whatever. He quizes me and asks me all the same questions.
Do you take recreational drugs?
My response "No"
My thoughts "I could if it would make this session last longer?"
Have you had thoughts of suicide?
My response "No"
My thoughts "No but I am dying to stay here longer"
Do you have a drinking problem?
My response "No"
My thoughts "What, you wanna go out for a drink after work?"
Can anyone tell I like to joke a lot?
So then he tells me that my written tests results where all good, and there there was only one very high point on the test. He tells me that the tests indicate I am a very warm person. Aww isn't that sweet, and he told me that it was evident from our discussion. (SCORE!)
Okay so Dr. handsomeBrainfry is married, but it sure made the session go quickly.
Well he said he saw no reason for me not to move forward with the surgery. I shook his hand and left that room. In all honestly, I liked him as a person.
Off I go to the uneventful EKG. I now have 8 or so little dots of white across my body where there was once hair. That lasted a whopping 5 minutes.
I then went and had my blood taken. She was a nice lady and it went quickly.
Then I head to the Endoscopy area. I can not lie. I was stressing over this part. I have NO idea why? I just was. I get told that I will have to wait 30 minutes before they will take me back as I was early.
All my other tests went quickly. By then Dave had returned. We chatted a bit, and I "people watched". There were two men in the room that also had the hospital band on. I did not talk to them as they were far across the room from me, but I could tell they knew why I was here as well. I am sure we will talk more later, but I was STRESSED out.
I finally get called back, they put me in a bed and make me put on a large hospital gown. I was able to keep on my shorts and sneaks. The nurse came and hooked up my IV and got it right the first try. (I love her!). Dave is sitting next to me, and I can tell he is concerned. She took my blood pressure and it was insanely high. She says, "Have you always had high blood pressure?" I was like umm no. So that upset me... a lot.
Well either way, the doctor shows up. I liked him a lot. No nonesense, but upbeat and funny. They wheel me back, and here I am. They slowly start to administer something in the IV, but I feel totally in control. We are blabbing, then he brings me this little cup and tells me to gargle. Oh yea.. that was so fun *fake smile*. What does it taste like?? Are there really words to describe this? LOL Let's just say it was odd, but I tried NOT to taste, and follow directions. He made me do that three times. I was like.. my breath is fine now thanks..
Then he comes at me with this cotton swab thing and very matter of factly tells me he is going to numb the back of my throat. I had no chance to react, so I decided to relax. After the third time he went pretty deep down my throat and I gagged a little. He then says to me, "Wow, you have good gag reflex". OH NOT HE DIDN'T! Who told?. The drugs were kicking, and I said, "Thanks, I think?" And everyone laughed. Then I felt the rest of the drugs coming and said, "Now, no asking me dirty questions while sedated. I am telling you in advance, they are all lies!".
Then they all laughed and said, "Oh no they aren't!"
That was the last I recalled. I woke up looking at Dave and they were all standing around me... like when Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz wakes up at the end of the movie.. and Dave says the first thing out of my mouth was, "They touched my no-no spot!"
Well that brought the house down. Thankfully I came back around very fast, and a goddess whose name is long lost to me came bearing ice water. God Bless her always!
Well I got dressed we left there, and we ate FOOD! I stayed low carb and high protien, had a Diet Pepsi(Yeah, i am working on that). We made our way home by 2:30pm. I wanted to nap and woke up at 7pm.
Now just to recap. The EGD was a joke. No sore throat, no issues. So those of you who have yet to do that, don't stress out. It was really easy. And the blood pressure thing must have been a fluke, because it was normal during and after the procedure.
So there, I have bored you with yet another step in my saga. I am now shopping for Protien drinks. The magic numbers I have been given are 5/15. Something with a Maximum of 5 grams of carbs and a minimum of 15 grams of protien. So, I am off to shop around for some of that stuff today.
I did talk to the doctor's office. They will review the results and submit the insurance information today. Hopefully, I should have a surgery date before October 1st. Could this really be happening? *smile*
Wishing everyone a great day. Keep your chin up!
Jeff
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