One Year surgiversary thoughts... - ThinnerTimes

saraczek · 11-12-2007, 08:21 AM

Looking back over the last year, I never thought I'd ever get to the year mark. Now that it has come and gone it came fast. It has been a bumpy 12 months for me as it has been with alot of us...lol. I am finally able to eat small amounts of real food without throwing up...yipeeeeee!!!

That has been a milestone in itself for me. Only had hairloss for about 3 weeks back during month 5 or 6. Wasn't even noticeable, thank God. Not too much skin sagging snap back pretty well or at least better than I had hoped it would. I guess at this point in the game I would finally be honest in saying that I would do this all over again if I had to. Up until about the 8 month mark I REALLY struggled with having done this to myself, lots of regrets back then. but now I am glad I did it, best decision I have made for myself. Now that all the physical issues I've dealt with are handled...on to the mental crap. I don't know about you guys but I still feel fat and I still feel like I look like a chubby. I would have to say the mental part of all this is far more difficult for me todeal with than the physical changes. I know I can't be as big as I was obviously going froma size 24 to an 8 I lost weight somewhere. It is definitely time for a mental adjustment for me now. For some of you other post-opers how do you deal with the metal side of accepting yourself now?

marine · 11-12-2007, 02:00 PM

I cannot really say a lot I have not yet all the experience. First congratulations for your great weight loss, and having most of the issues resolved. The mental is critical: you smile at people, they smile you back. You love yourself, the people will also like you. You walk proudly in the street, people will notice you. So easy said, so difficult achieved. We will always have the issue, as we will never be able to just eat normally (although normal for few of my skinny colleagues is as much as I eat). However the best would be to get some support other medical or in support groups. To avoid going on the other extreme and avoid eating.
Again bravo forthe 148. CAN YOU IMAGINE? This is just great. A lot of courage for the continuation of your journey in becoming a normal person.

Take care

MiladyB · 11-12-2007, 09:37 PM

Congratulations on your one year surgiversary! I'm so glad to hear that things have progressively gotten better for you.

I do know where you are coming from when you talk about the mental side of all of this. That too has been the hardest part for me. I've struggled with still feeling "fat". For me the plastic surgery has helped. Though I still have issues with sagging skin on my thighs getting rid of the panni has finally brought me to a place where I am beginning to feel that my body is more "normal". I know I still look at women and think....man, if I could only look like that!!

I'm still surprised at times when I get a glimpse of myself in a mirror or in a window and I realize that I DO "look like that!!" *L* For me, inwardly I still often feel "fat"....but when I honestly look at myself I realize that I'm NOT! Like I said, it still takes me by surprise. It takes a long time for the head to catch up with the body....I'm almost 2 years post-op and I think my head is finally starting to catch up with the changes. I don't really know what has brought about my change of thinking...the plastic surgery definitely helped but the rest? Well I just think it is time and acceptance of myself.

marine · 11-13-2007, 01:46 PM

Beth,
Your testimony is very interesting. Concerning the change in mind: is it also difficult because the environment, meaning family and close friends maybe still perceive us fat? Or is it really only us? We have also a distorded image of the great body through all the commercials, magazines, and films. As soon as we are at the beach, we can observe that the actual "great bodies" are'nt so many (unless we are in an exclusive resort with a lots of 0 sizes). So is it us only, or also a little the influence from the medias, and thus contributing to a not wrong but too tough image of what is the definition of "thin" ?

Good evening and all your comments, I drink them, they are really helpful.

Claire-in-Texas · 11-14-2007, 11:42 AM

Very interesting thread, and thank you, Ladies!

Happy First Surgiversary!!!!

I agree with you, Sara - a bit bumpty but so worth it, especially when the hair stopped falling out. Your post is a good one for newbies to see because it is the reality in its negatives and total fabulousness, all in one. I'm only 7 months out, but still, I hear ya!

About looking fat to myself, sometimes I look just awful to myself, fat and ugly. Other times I think "not too bac for an old lady!" It truly is a process, a journey, and Beth said it best - it is a matterof time and acceptance.

I made my husband a nice turkey (sliced from the deli, low sodium, low fat) sandwich, with tomato, lettuce and mayo, and some Fritos today. I looked at it, and I thought to myself, I just don't want that. I clearly have been working for 8 months on my food mindset. I don't think of myself as being on a diet, and I'm still in the "losing" phase, BUT clearly RNY has changed how I eat now and in the future, always. It's never going to be like it was -- and I thank G-d for that!

I consider myself a recovering addict - food being the drug of choice in the past. I will never forget who I was, where I am, and how I got to be here, in this place and time.

Again, thank you, Ladies!

saraczek · 11-16-2007, 06:19 AM

Thank you all for the congrats. It is appreciated. Hope you all have good pouch days ahead of you for our upcoming holiday season!...lol

barker1964 · 11-19-2007, 06:42 AM

I lost 93 lbs and i am still wearing the same clothes, I guess mentally i still don't feel the weight change even though my tee shirts fit like a dress. I know that it will come a time soon when i will need a mental adjustment to go along with hte changes that are happening to my body. Alot of us feel that way. Stay strong and look at the blessing more than any thing else. And by the way a very big congrats. Very much looking foward to my first year.