I'm scared and need advice - ThinnerTimes

HeavyOnCharm · 09-02-2007, 05:43 PM

I've been lurking on this forum for months and have gained much knowledge and support from everyone here. I had laparoscopic Roux-En-Y Gastric Bypass on June 14th. I lost 28 pounds before surgery and have lost 39 pounds since surgery. I'm thrilled that I've lost 67 pounds to date, but I'm scared that I am going to do something to impede my progress. At 11 weeks post-op I'm at the point now that I can eat just about everything and I don't have any reaction to things. Once in a while if I eat too fast I don't feel well, but I haven't ever dumped. This scares me more than anything since very few things cause a reaction.

I've been emotionally stable for the most part during this whole process, but now I am completely petrified that I am going to fail. Has anyone else felt this way? I also am concerned that I've only lost 2.5 pounds in the past two weeks. I think I'm overreacting on that though. I'm also afraid that I'm not eating what I should be and have made an appointment with my surgeon's nutritionist to discuss my concerns. I need help with items that should be my post-op staples. I'm afraid that I'm looking in the wrong places for protein. Are there any lists out there that give examples of items that we should be eating.

I've also noticed my tastes have changed tremendously. Chicken now tastes like dirt every time I try it, when before surgery it was wonderful. I can't get enough red-meat and ham post-op, which is quite a change for me.

Any advice or ideas are greatly appreciated.

Toony · 09-02-2007, 06:15 PM

Hi "HOC!"

Welcome to posting here! I can't help you because I'm still pre-op, but from what I've read --- hang in there... it's quite a ride! Refresh yourself on the rules your surgeon gave you ... and make sure you're eating according to plan... Do you have a 3-month follow up appointment coming up or a support group you can visit? Grab on to any and all help that's offered!!!

Toony

HeavyOnCharm · 09-02-2007, 06:52 PM

Hi Toony,

My 3 month post op appointment is Tuesday. Unfortunately in my area there is only a support group meeting once a month. I missed August's meeting because I had a conflict and I'll be out of town for the one in September.

I think that I'm probably just over reacting but all of a sudden it seems like I have this huge weight on my shoulders. I've been eating the amounts that the doctor alloted, however they didn't give me any examples other than the standard first 8 week foods and now I'm afraid to eat anything as it might not be the right thing. I try different things as they present themselves, but I'm afraid that I might be doing more harm than good. I also have this fear that I'm stretching my pouch. Weird, I know, for all of these fears to suddenly show up.

I want this surgery to be a success, but people keep telling me these horror stories about how this friend and that friend were not successful.

I've joined Curves so that I can workout 30 minutes a day and will try to add in a half hour of walking each day too, but all those years of struggling with my weight and the ups and downs are making me feel like I'm not doing enough to ensure my success.

Toony · 09-02-2007, 07:02 PM

Hi Again HOC... I've read it here a thousand times... have faith, follow the rules and things will happen. I'm betting you'll feel much better after your appt. Tuesday. The pro's will step in here and help you with food choices... meanwhile, use the SEARCH feature and look for information about plateaus, protein suggestions, etc. I know ANXIETY is one of the things that kicks in about this time too (hormones?)... so I'm thinking you're 100% on track!

There is a TON (pardon the weight reference) of help here... so hang on and keep us posted on how you're doing!

Gina in NY · 09-02-2007, 07:48 PM

I'm just south of Albany.

As for food etc. Write it down and look at it. I use protein shakes still at 14 months out. I don't do too much with nuts because of the fat content, but I do a lot of beef and a little chicken. (no pork - pouch does not like pork)

It is absolutely fine and expected to slow down the weight loss here and there. But unless you know how many calories you are taking in, you really can't know if it is too much or too little - yea - if you eat too little you can stop losing too. Gets you coming and going.

Anyway, keep track and take your info to the nutritionist. Are you exercising at all? Drinking tons of water (crystal lite - whatever)

I didn't read the other posts carefully, so forgive me if I'm repeating.

But ultimately, you hold the fork, you know? Respect you own hard work, use the tool and keep coming here for support. You aren't going to suddenly lose your mind and eat a whole cake, so try to relax. It happens one bite at a time and if you write it down, you'll be more careful!

Good luck.

Claire-in-Texas · 09-02-2007, 08:07 PM

Hi, and nice to meet you, HOC!

I am almost 5 months post op, and every day I tell myself that I have this wonderful tool, and only I can control if it/I will be successful with it. I must make the right choices, at the right times of the day.

I found Weight Loss Surgery for Dummies very helpful, even at your stage, since it goes into, a great depth, the eating part of your stage (all stages).

I think writing it all down is a good idea, too.

I hope this helps - for me it's about my own head game,a nd good choices. Everyone is different. I hope this helps as just another idea for you to consider.

Best regards!

moosie · 09-02-2007, 08:33 PM

I'm about 5 weeks post op. I have the same fears and haven't dumped either. I think the fears are normal and from what my dietician said only about 60% of people have dumping so I don't know if I'm fortunate or not, I haven't decided. I know it will make me have to watch all that much more what I eat.
As for peoples stories, I've heard them all too. There is nothing you can do about it now. You've had the surgery and you just need to follow dr's orders and not worry about all the negative nellies out there. I actually begged people to put me in touch with all of these people with horror stories and nobody would, IRL.

Good for you for joining Curves, I love that place.

AusLaurie · 09-03-2007, 12:39 AM

I went through a phase where I was totally obsessive about fear of failing. I think it is normal because we have tried for so long and so many times to lose weight and keep it off AND failed repeatedly.

So I think this time when we lose the weight so wonderfully we suddenly hit a point where we think that it is too good to be true and we fear gaining it all back.

I don't dump either and I have no problems with any types of food.

Now that I am 10 months out I still have the fear of failure but it strikes less often.

I think at your stage you will continue to lose weight (with a fair number of stressful plateau's

) The key is to try and eat healthy, protein first and keep the simple carbs to a minimum. Because even though we don't dump on them we know that eating too much of those things will slow our weight loss and once you are over the honeymoon period (around 6 months) you will need to rely more on what you have learned about healthy eating and less on the surgery.

Try www.fitday.com I found it useful in helping me figure out what was heathly and what wasn't

Good luck with your journey
Laurie

Dyann · 09-03-2007, 06:28 AM

For me, the fear of failing never goes away. While in the losing phase, you are worried you won't lose it. While maintaining, you fear you will put it back on. I look at the fear as a positive feedback mechanism. As long as I have it, I will remain vigilant in my choices.

3 months is a critical time. You can eat more and now is where the good foundation of healthy choices starts to pay off. Do you eat fish?? That was the best source of easy to tollerate protein to this day even. Chicken breast is a no no for me.

Look through the recipe forum here and nutrition. Fitday.com is a wonderful way to track your food and weight loss progress. Don't forget about exercise, fluids and supplements. They are all important for the whole process to be successful.

Use your fear to drive you to success.