Christina

Oh Bridget,

Most of us can relate to your feelings. We are taking on much more than we can handle at times, and maybe it is because for so long we lived on the back burner.. at least I know I did. I just didn't do anything with my life other than work. Now I am working to become all that I can be and all that I want to be. It is not easy by any means.. but to me that is what is important is that I am working for my tomorrow.. for my future.. Sure I am tired, but this is something I truly want to do .. NOW.. not later. This may be different if I were in your shoes, because unlike you, I don't have small children.

You do what you need to do to be happy. Girlfriend, I told you at my house that you are taking on too much.. Miss Mary Kay, Miss Mom, Miss Worker Bee, Miss PTA Mom.. you can only do so much.. just take it one day at a time.. you deserve a break too!!!

Give yourself a break. Expect only what you can give at this time in your life. Spend the time and money on you and your kids for now, then if you feel like it later, go back to school. Heck if you get married... ahem.. WHEN you get Married.. you may have a better opportunity to go back to school then and you may want to then. Even if you don't, you are not a failure .. you are raising two young men all on your own.. you provide for them, nurture them and love them unconditionally.. what more could you expect from life? You have two boys who love you and adore you. Those are your two greatest accomplishments so far as I can see. Don't worry chicken.. things happen in time.. you can't force everything to happen right now.. you control freak!! LOL Kidding girlfriend.. go with the flow.. watch your kids grow.. it's quite apparent you miss them ..

Love ya!!!

__________________
Christina
Open RNY 03/31/2004
274/128/137 (131 Per Dr. C)
BMI: 47 / 22

"There's nothing noble in being superior to your fellow men. True nobility is being superior to your former self." - Ernest Miller Hemingway

"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal." - Henry Ford

Bigbaldbuddie

__________________
Gerry - July 6th, 2004/Open
Dr. Callery
360/209/167
Before/now/Target weight (per MetLife chart)

JohnsWife4Life

what is this for? quick reply? if this is to Bridget, hang in there girlie, it only gets tougher, and we know that means what? when the going gets tough the tough get what? yesssssssssssssss TOUGHER..;..

JohnsWife4Life

Oh I like this. I went to college in 75, dropped out after an attempt to kill myself. I went to college in 83 and dropped out because I hated leaving my two year old after my divorce. I went back in 90, I took one day at a time and two classes at a time, but I had another husband by then, so I knew they were having that night life with daddy. I didn't stop from there, when I got on the RN program my (baby with John) was two and it broke my heart to leave him at the sitter at 0630 four days a week. It killed me, but I had been destitute with money problems, and was determined no man would ever leave me in a hole like that again, that I would have my RN no matter what to fall back on. If I am in a hole over a man, well I jumped in, but doll, I can crawl out, because thats who I am, a survivor. You are too. We all are. We are the "tip of the sword" (pearl harbor).

Okay I am wearing my heels and my sexy black outfit my daughter got me for Christmas. I am thinking I should bring my husband, so he decide if it is something he wants to be a part of or not. He is shy and talks too loud, doesn't know his own strength, but he is the love of my life, the one God plopped in my lap thirteen years ago. And he has yours Bridget, when you just least expect it.

Hugs,

Traci

bridgetgirl

Kina: thank you sister girl for the feedback. Right now, today I feel a regained strength from talking to so many friends on and off this board.

Im going to be okay, and its okay that school is not for me, my aunt, a school teacher for 35 years told me that today too... its not for everyone.

I have to admit that the uncomfortable feeling I had had somewhat lessened it not as strong, not AS uncomfortable.

To resolve my issues I have decided to do some things... first of all relax, quit trying to control my destiny, whether that be in the relationships that I form or the choices I make career wise. I am keeping a journal of my expenses, i know I can do this on my salary, I have been doing it for years... what is so different now? Nothing!

I do love my boys, I LOVE being a parent... it is my greatest joy and thats where i want to put all my energy for the next 10 years at least... being the best mentor and rold model for them.

Next, a friend sggested I may be depressed, perhaps he is right. I am going to visit a Dr and see what he/she has to say about my state of mind and then take it one day at a time. ( I sure do say that alot!)

I think for now, that will do it... oh yeah and listen to Anthony Robbins... how can you be down after listening to that guy? Thanks pals, your the best!

__________________
J.Bridget Fisher aka koi-pea
2/9/04 lap 5'11"
298/170-trying to lose another 10

www.myspace.com/caliclovercutie
What Sawyer would call me on LOST: ladybug

"People will argue with you that getting what you want in life isn’t something you can learn, if you’re destined to be one of the worlds winners as opposed to one of its perpetual whiners, its because you have been born with the right talents and temperament and have a big dose of self-esteem, ambition, and good judgment." Kate White

Esouza

Try Wayne Dyer too. I like him even tho it may be more on the spiritual side. I hope you're feeling better. I am.

Gerry's analogy is right on about the car. I have also heard it where it included looking at the owner's manual. There is also one about the plane that takes a long flight. It starts on a certain heading but due to the variables involved it has to make small corrections along the way to compensate and keep on heading. Trying to wrap your mind around it all at once in really hard ann can be overwhelming. Find inspiration and hope in everything you set forth doing. It's all good.

http://www.drwaynedyer.com/home/index.cfm

__________________
Dr. Callery
Open RNY
05/23/01
448/175

Christina

First of all you are welcome.. but don't know what I did.. lol

Secondly please do NOT bring up Anthony Robbins again please!! It's a long story, and I'll tell ya sometime.. but oh man that name chaps my hyde.. and it has nothing to do with him personally.. Well, kind of .. but not really.. lol

Girl you can do this.. do stop trying to control your destiny.. let it happen. Also you do say alot that you are going to go to a therapist.. so do it already!! You know I love ya!!

I have an idea.. try and control one day at a time.. not the entire future. .and I bet you'll do just fine..

I know it!!!

__________________
Christina
Open RNY 03/31/2004
274/128/137 (131 Per Dr. C)
BMI: 47 / 22

"There's nothing noble in being superior to your fellow men. True nobility is being superior to your former self." - Ernest Miller Hemingway

"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal." - Henry Ford