My Story - Page 4 - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

scrappinlaurie · 10-25-2009, 07:04 PM

Good for you Kelly. I think this is a great idea. I hope that something happens to this doctor. Many years ago when I had my third child, I had some problems afterwards and I regret that I never did anything about reporting the doctor and how he treated me.

poet_kelly · 10-31-2009, 08:37 PM

I want to whine about mom stuff.

My mother and I have this weird relationship. I know, lots of people have weird relationships with their mothers or some sort of mom issues. I am not alone.

I grew up in an abusive home. My father was the abuser. My mother just didn't do anything about it. She says she didn't know it was going on. I don't really believe her. But I've mostly forgiven her for what she did not do.

That's not what I want to whine about now, though.

We have never been close. Since I've been an adult, she has not shown a great deal of interest in my life. The last couple years, I think she's been trying harder.

I moved to the town where I live now more than five years ago. She's come here to visit me once. Last December, when I was in the hospital with pneumonia. I was amazed that she came. I think Mike told her on the phone that he thought I might die, and I think that's why she came.

So she has been telling me she was going to come visit in November. But today she said she's not. She thought she was going to have a whole week off work this month, but now it turns out she's only going to have a couple days off. So she doesn't think she'll feel like traveling.

Well, it's three-hour drive. She was going to stay for one night. Does that even count as traveling? Do you need a whole week off for a two-day trip?

So she doesn't want to come. I'm not really surprised. Ever since she's been telling me she was going to come, I've been telling people I would be surprised if she really did.

So why does it bother me that she's not coming?

Whine.

Kelly

BrandnewMe · 11-01-2009, 08:46 AM

Because she's your mom and even though you don't want to care, you do! It's normal to feel that way.

I have lived in Texas for 16 years, my sister for 22 years. My dad has come down to see us 6 times in 22 years. He came for my first wedding because I asked him to walk me down the aisle. We have both graduated college (me with bachelor's, my sister bach and master's) and he only came for 1 graduation. He came down 1 time for 2 nights and we had a blast! The other 3 were day trips down (it's a 4 hour drive so he might have stayed 2 hours) to see his grandchildren after they were born. He can travel fine, he has no physical disabilities, and now he's retired, but he doesn't want to come see us. He expects us to travel up to see him and if we don't do that, it doesn't seem to bother him much.

I've reconciled myself that I'll never have a close relationship with him, but I still get upset when I ask him to come down for an event and he doesn't come.

I can understand your frustration. I think it would be worse with it being a mother (than a father). Just allow yourself to be upset and work through the emotions of it.

Hang in there!

poet_kelly · 11-03-2009, 11:57 AM

I had an appointment today with my psychiatrist. I only see him about every three months, and I usually hate those appointments because he is always running way late and I have to sit in the waiting room forever. Like today, my appointment was at 11:30 but I didn't actually get to see him until 12:15. And this was a good day. I usually have to wait at least an hour. And I just think that's rude.

But I kind of had fun today. First of all, the receptionist told me three times how good I look. Which is always nice. When I finally got to see the doctor, he said he almost didn't recognize me out in the waiting room. He asked how much weight I've lost, and I told him, and said I had 22 more pounds to go. He said, "You want to lose more?" I said yes, another 22 pounds. He said, "Are you sure? You seem fine now."

I explained that my BMI is currently about 26 which is still considered overweight. He looked skeptical and dug through his desk and pulled out this calculator thing and asked my height and weight and figured out my BMI. He then agreed it was 26 and that that is still considered overweight. Didn't I just say that?

I took my latest lab report to show him, because one of the meds I am on can raise your glucose and cholesterol so he likes to keep an eye on that. He said my glucose was good, which it is, and then looked at my cholesterol. And was amazed. He asked if I was taking medication for my cholesterol. I said nope. He said, "Are you sure?" Like maybe I don't know what meds I take or what they are for. I said I was sure.

He seemed impresssed with all the labs I had done and looked at all of them. He impressed me because he pointed out that my iron and B12 are on the low side and suggested I take those supplements. It impressed me because while they are on the low side, they are still within the normal range on the lab report, and usually doctors don't mention it unless the actually outside of that normal range and the lab report flags it as being low. My PCP read this lab report and she didn't say anything about them being on the low side.

I told him I just started taking iron and that I use the B12 patch. He'd never heard of the B12 patch and asked some questions about that. Then he asked what other vitamins I take and if I get them all from a patch. I wish!

He had some idea that there might be some malabsorption after RNY but didn't really know much about it or how it worked, so he asked some questions and I explained it. He actually just had some questions about how they do the RNY. He asked if they removed part of the stomach. I explained that they don't remove anything and explained how it all works. You might think a doctor would at least know that, but apparently not. But that's OK. I don't mind explaining.

And the receptionist kept saying how good I look.

Kelly

BrandnewMe · 11-03-2009, 12:20 PM

Well, he is a psychiatrist so RNY isn't his forte so I wouldn't worry about that. BUT, he was asking questions and getting information and I think that's a big plus for him! Hopefully he will tuck that information away to help someone else down the road.

I'm impressed he took such an interest in everything and not just what's in your head!

Amilea · 11-03-2009, 02:38 PM

That's awesome! How nice to have a medical professional talk to you like an equal human being instead of a problem to solve!

I just noticed that tomorrow is your surgiversery! *cheers for you*

YvetteRene · 11-03-2009, 03:51 PM

Is there a way to save a thread? There is so much good information about vitamins on this thread that I really want to come back to it often!

poet_kelly · 11-03-2009, 04:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YvetteRene

Is there a way to save a thread? There is so much good information about vitamins on this thread that I really want to come back to it often!

You could bookmark it, I guess. Glad you found good info!

Kelly

poet_kelly · 11-03-2009, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrandnewMe

Well, he is a psychiatrist so RNY isn't his forte so I wouldn't worry about that. BUT, he was asking questions and getting information and I think that's a big plus for him! Hopefully he will tuck that information away to help someone else down the road.

I'm impressed he took such an interest in everything and not just what's in your head!

Oh, I realize psychiatrists don't need to know much about WLS. I just figured a doctor, any doctor, would have a basic idea of what a gastric bypass was and know they don't take out part of the stomach. It doesn't worry me that he didn't know that, though.

I told Mike about his conversation when he got home from work, and he said, "They don't take out part of the stomach? I thought they took out part of the stomach." He must never listen to me. I am quite sure I have explained how they do a gastric bypass on more than one occasion.

Kelly

poet_kelly · 11-03-2009, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amilea

That's awesome! How nice to have a medical professional talk to you like an equal human being instead of a problem to solve!

I just noticed that tomorrow is your surgiversery! *cheers for you*

It is nice. But you know, all of my doctors treat me that way, really. 'Cause mostly I don't keep seeing them if they don't. I mean, I realize they have medical expertise that I don't have, which is why I see them. But I am still intelligent and still know stuff. And like, in this case, I know a lot more about WLS than this doctor does. And I expect to be treated with respect and to have my knowledge valued. I have seen doctors that did not treat me this way, but I just did not keep seeing them.

Yes, tomorrow is my surgiversary! I guess getting a cake would be a bad idea, huh?

Kelly