The Metamorphosis of Mishi - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

MishiB · 08-19-2009, 02:00 PM

Metamorphosis: any complete change in appearance, character, circumstances, etc.

I thought I would get a head start on chronicling my change, my metamorphsis. I have so enjoyed reading other accounts on this TT forum, and I love the idea of journaling out in the open. It's amazing to see all who have transformed over the past couple of years, not only in appearance, but in life circumstances. Thank you to all who have shared your experiences, and continue to share - the good and the bad.

My name is Michelle, my nickname is Mishi. I like to be called Mishi... I only get called Michelle when I am in trouble - but my friends and family call me Mishi.

I am a lifelong member of the rollercoaster weight loss club... in my whole of 30 years I have lost 100 lbs and gained much more. I started dieting when I was in middle school. I have skinny parents and a skinny brother... my mom tried, but couldn't understand why when we all ate the same food I would get fatter and they would all stay skinny. They never had to watch what they ate and could eat in copious quantities... I of course cannot/should not... but I do, which is why I am where I am. I don't have that magical off switch to tell me I'm full - stop eating! Interestingly, when I was pregnant with both my DD's, I felt full, and not because they were pushing on my stomach, this was early on in the pregnancy... I wonder if it was more hormonal...

In any case... I have decided on the Lap Band for me. I have gone through the Psych eval. and the Nut. eval, my insurance has approved the surgery and my surgery date is set for September 17, 2009. Per my M.D.'s instructions I will begin my clear liquids diet two weeks prior to surgery...

Short term goals: Take measurements; take pictures (I hate being the one in front of the lens... I love being behind it!)

Long Term Goals: Get healthy! Stay healthy! Ok, those are given... what do I really want? To wear single digit clothing

I don't recall EVER wearing single digits - EVER! In a year I will be graduating with my doctorate... I want to look good when I walk! We will be celebrating at Disneyland... I want to comfortably get on every ride without the awkward glances my way. When pictures are taken of me... I want more than just a head shot to be proud of!

The hardest part... telling my parents. My dad and stepmom would prefer that I loose weight just eating correctly... well I can see how good I am doing at that thus far :P. My mom doesn't want to have to think about me going through surgery, but is otherwise supportive, and will being coming for a visit the first weekend post-op (it'll be great to have extra help with the girls, who are 1 and 3). My DH has been incredibly supportive through every venture I take on and is as excited about this as I am!

...and away we go!...

Crimson Kittie · 08-19-2009, 02:16 PM

You have a great outlook and have firm goals in place! I think you will do great Mishi

I wish you the best of luck on this journey to your new life (((hugs)))

MishiB · 08-21-2009, 10:09 AM

Not to be confused with "I have a dream... "

Last night I dreamt that I had my surgery, and I could see all the little incisions on my tummy... guess I've been looking at too many pictures online - lol

foxyfuzz · 08-22-2009, 02:14 PM

Keep focused on what it is you want to see. See the small cuts on the tummy, see yourself at Disneyland enjoying all the kiddie rides too!

It will happen girlie, trust me it will.

It is a WILD ride, but so worth it!

jenn75 · 08-22-2009, 03:45 PM

Welcome, Mishi, cute name for a cute chick. Thanks for sharing your story and I hope that you really achieve all that you want with this! Metamorphosis is a very appropriate word! Good luck!

MishiB · 08-24-2009, 10:07 AM

Thanks everyone!

Ok, I have decided that today will be my last "real" food day... at least for a while. I am about 3 & 1/2 weeks until my surgery, and I want a good head start for my journey. So tonight we celebrate my DH's birthday (a couple days early, but he doesn't mind

), then tomorrow I will begin 10 days of Medifast... leftover products from my last quasi-successful weightloss venture - lost weight, just couldn't keep it off... Followed by my 2 week pre-op liquid diet.

Tonight I will take pictures and measurements with plans on posting them sometime pre-surgery. Motivation!

MishiB · 08-28-2009, 02:00 PM

Just ranting... just admitting my faults (what? I am not perfect??):

Here I sit... three weeks until surgery, dreading the two week liquid diet that I know I have to / need to do! My biggest fear? Sabbatoging myself!

I know better. I know I need to lose the weight to reduce the size of my liver. Here is my problem... I'm trying to do the medifast thing this week, then onto my liquid diet. I've done medifast, it works... but I get to the end of the day... and give up. I think "I can't do this, I'm just better off fat!" NOOOOO, I refuse to give up this fight. *ARGH* Am I worth it? I AM WORTH IT!!

MishiB · 09-02-2009, 09:43 PM

YES I AM. I want to munch, I want to crunch, I want to feel full... this is why I have chosen surgery after countless efforts of not being able to loose weight and keep it off. Because I love to eat, eat, eat. Not for nutritional values, but for taste and texture. For the feeling of being full... constantly. Now as I sit here, I think I am hungry... being hungry will not kill me. So I will drink, and drink and drink... then the inevitable... I will pee and pee and pee...

I will survive the next two weeks until surgery. This is so incredibly worth it! And two weeks of liquid diet compared to the rest of my life??? Is nothing!

MishiB · 09-02-2009, 09:56 PM

Me at 265 lbs

MishiB · 09-10-2009, 11:41 AM

WOO~HOO!!! One week to go! I can hardly stand it. I am absorbing so much information right now, part of my personality. Watching the surgery on you-tube (oh technology

) Watching and reading about people who have been successful... wheel me in already, let's get this party started!!!

Annoying part ~ my DH, who loves me no matter what, and is supper supportive forgets that I am supposed to be on my liquid diet!?! Driving home from work, he'll ask "can I pick up some *noms* at the store for you?" - um... NO!!! - LOL!

Then he'll say "oh ya, you're on liquids" because he truly has forgotten - ah-well.

Here's to another week!