"But you have such a great personality..." - Page 16 - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

ragazzarosa · 05-22-2009, 09:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenn75

So, lesson learned. I "broadened my horizons" with this guy, and in return he has completely blown me off, no explanation, nothing. I guess karma really is a bitch. The good thing is I didn't think he was out-right fabulous or anything, just someone to hang out with/spend time with. I thought we had great chemistry, but whatever.

I vote for not calling him blowing you off "karma." You went out with a guy, chatted, thought you clicked and he didn't.

Like I said before, you can't help who you are attracted to (if that was even this guy's problem - maybe he was married or something!). It's not a good or bad thing, it is what it is. I honestly think it's almost hard wired into us - I've always liked olive skinned men. I don't know why, that's just how it is. I like a man with big, beefy thighs.

yummmmm....what was that? I got distracted...

Oh yeah, just take it easy - you are doing great and I know you'll meet someone special. Don't look at dating as some form of cosmic retrubution because how does that explain all those crazies on Jerry Springer?!

jenn75 · 05-22-2009, 09:31 AM

Thanks. I am not a big believer in karma, to be honest. I just realize that perhaps this guy was doing the same thing I was doing with the last guy I "rejected"...trying to make himself attracted to someone he's not. That is my guess and it could be completely wrong, and yes it occurred to me that he could be in another relationship or something else.

jenn75 · 05-22-2009, 12:17 PM

Ok, so I'm an idiot. He did not blow me off, after all. I heard from him today and he was just really busy working yesterday (I already knew he was working 8 am to 10pm, however he usually texts me from work so I thought it was strange I did not hear from him at least once). My friends agree with me that I should've felt like perhaps he was blowing me off due to our established pattern of communication (texting night & day, him calling me usually on his way home from work), but they are glad to hear that perhaps he's not the asshole I/we assumed he was. I will say that I will proceed with caution now, though. But again, I do not plan to do the internet dating thing anytime soon no matter what happens with this current guy.

ragazzarosa · 05-22-2009, 05:40 PM

YEA! glad he called!

Phoenixfire · 05-22-2009, 06:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jenn75

he usually texts me from work so I thought it was strange I did not hear from him at least once). My friends agree with me that I should've felt like perhaps he was blowing me off due to our established pattern of communication (texting night & day, him calling me usually on his way home from work

Hey Jenn it's great to hear that you've met someone that you have chemistry with!

So that spark was there when you met...and now it's turned in to solid, frequent and enjoyable contact back and forth? That sounds promising! As long as YOU are into him! No settling for guys that don't measure up to what you want my dear. So if you're digging him, then you ENJOY it and see how things play out. Have some fun dating someone you've got that mutual chemistry with! (It's a blast!)

It's good to hear you feel good about someone. I'm happy for you.

jenn75 · 05-23-2009, 09:53 PM

Thanks, ladies! Yes, it was a bit of a let down when I thought he was blowing me off, I've never been wrong in my "instincts" about someone before. I'm glad to know that I was right about him. He's a sweetie. He has even been texting me a good part of the day today even though he's on a fishing trip this weekend with his buddies.

I think the fact that I'm sort of in "cautious" mode is great, that I don't want to just jump into something serious. I'm glad my frame of mind has loosened up a bit to just let things happen as they will (or won't). I'm definitely letting him make the moves. I'm not bringing up when are we going to meet again, etc., and it feels good to just not worry about that crap.

jenn75 · 05-27-2009, 11:13 AM

So I'm wondering, when is it that I'm gonna believe that this guy really does like me? I mean, maybe I should be suspicious for some time, maybe I'm being suspicious because it's protecting me from rejection or for "falling" too fast, but the guy seems like a perfectly decent guy and all I'm doing is anticipating when exactly his asshole qualities are going to emerge.

**************

I wish I weren't so ravenous this week. I'm not eating very "well", I'm making bad choices, but I'm in a do not care, my time of the month sort of mode. I hope this goes away soon.

jenn75 · 05-27-2009, 04:42 PM

More to the above post:

I just don't know, I've never been one to brace myself for disappointment and rejection once I've met someone. I usually dive right in, give it all I got, think that it MUST work, and then when it doesn't it's the biggest disappointment in the world. So maybe this is normal...maybe this is how it's supposed to work. Proceed with extreme caution. Assume guy will do something shitty to you right off the bat until somehow, after some period of time or some period of devotion to you you will realize that he does like you. Who the hell knows. This way might be just as dysfunctional as the "old" way. I just know I'm not used to taking things slow, and we are and it's driving me slightly nuts, just worrying that he is losing interest or something. But we both said we wanted to take things slow. I do, I just don't think I'm good at it or am used to it!

jenn75 · 05-27-2009, 04:49 PM

I got sick today. Let's just say that I didn't eat very well. Nothing BAD, but I had wedding soup with the pasta in it and perhaps that put me over the edge? I also ate a scone, which I've had before and haven't gotten sick. But perhaps I ate them all too close together? I got so nauseous that I had to leave work early. I felt bad leaving work early, I always feel my boss is judging me, and for some reason it just so happened that she was in another office today so I just don't want her to think I went home just b/c she wasn't there. I mean, I did tell our department director I was going home. I know that it could easily go away within an hour or so, I guess I could've stayed, but the idea of possibly puking at work is not alluring to me, so I left. Luckily I did not throw up. It did give me a chance to explain to Tom this whole dumping effect. He hasn't asked any questions about the surgery yet. So I explained how you never know what you're gonna get sick on sometimes until you try it because it's different for everyone. I really don't even want any food. I just ate some canned chicken with buffalo sauce and now I'm feeling not so well again. Ugh.

jenn75 · 05-30-2009, 12:41 PM

I was so bummed today, but not for so bad of a reason. I tried on some dresses that I couldn't afford, the first dresses I've tried on, and damnit they looked so good on me. If only I had an endless supply of money

The one was so perfect for summer, and the other one I could wear anytime, but mainly for work.

I also bought a swim suit today and signed up for the pool membership with my apartment complex. Now I just need a tan...I'm so pale. I think the suit looks good on me, and I may post pics in the pic forum to celebrate my 4 months. Nah, just took the pics and I'm way too pale. I need a tan first!