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Old 01-22-2008, 03:28 AM   #61 (permalink)
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I've got London and both Chicagos--but thanks! I didn't just glibly grab everything this tour, because I know I can't possibly listen to all of it and discern between them--but I too LOVE the Posse song.

Actually, I remember laughing out loud the first time I heard it, because it reminded of George Costanza on Seinfeld yelling "Tippy Toes, Tippy Toes." It still cracks me up.

And can I tell you too that I have never heard so many syllables in the one word "vanilla" as I have Tori sing in "Siren" when she was in Charlotte NC years ago. She stretched that mother out! (She did this with Jesus in Precious Things too...good times...)

-Mike
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Old 01-22-2008, 03:47 AM   #62 (permalink)
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Default lol

Oh so YOU just have the ONES I do. I see how it is

I don't have the other Chicago. Only Pip at the Vic.

Isn't London the best MPCD? I didn't even know I had it. What a surprise!
I was thrilled.

And as I was typing out lines from Siren, it did give me pause, how exactly does one spell Tori's way of saying veeeniilllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaa veeenillllllla? That's actually D's complaint. He can't understand her accent unless he reads the lyrics. People ask me WHAT COUNTRY IS SHE FROM? (um South Carolina It's just her own unique way of pronouncing words.) My mom complains that..."I don't understand a WORD she's saying "(and ain't that a good thang)

Hey, Tori herself said she was anchoives. She's not for everyone. In fact, it's kinda uncool to like Tori nowadays. I just don't care about cool

Her music changed my life and it's never failed to be relevant to the path I'm on right when it hits the stores (or cyberworld as the case may be)


And the girls in
"circles and circles and circles again circles and circles got to stop spinning..."
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"The soul-quake happened here in a glass world.....particle by particle she slowly changes...."
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Old 01-22-2008, 04:23 AM   #63 (permalink)
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Default awakening

It is important to heal that inside me that caused me to be obese in the first place. sooo I'm gonna try:

At the beginning stages of my life, I was raised on a ranch. My Dad's family owned acres and acres of property that had cattle and horses. As well as specifically named sites for kids. Chimney Rock, Rollercoaster Hill. An abadoned old car to play in. It was about a two hour drive into the nearest city and at least 30-45 minutes on a dirt road. When I was 15 months old, my brother came along. According to the myth, I was a terror. In desperation my mom finally agreed to go to a child rearing class at her sisters church. That night she became a born again Christain. I remember that night. We stayed over at my aunt's house. It was too late to drive back to the ranch. My mother prayed for a sign that this was the right thing for her to do and one came. A light shining across the ceiling. That was her confirmation. My dad wasn't down with this at all but he was an easy going guy. He didn't care if she went to church. He just wasn't going to go with her. He didn't care if I went to church either. I had a favorite shirt that declared me a "Little Monster" I wouldn't take it off. When my mom coaxed me to nap (which was a rare occurence) she would carefully strip the shirt off, launder it, then put it back on me before I woke up. On Sunday mornings she did not have the time for that routine. I stayed with my dad. She wanted him to come to church too. To be saved as she was saved. She did not want to be unequally yoked. My dad would never be convinced. He grew up in a Mormon household and had not accepted that religion or religion in general much less this born again baloney. It became a contest of wills. She would burn his Exorcist book and so he burned her Bible. When he went to the coal mining town of Eureka to gamble, he would come home and slip money under her pillow. It went directly into the tithe basket. My mom was obsessive even in those early days and as an early christain she was fanatical. My estranged aunt (atheist,democrat= evil then) told me the last straw came when my mom lifted my brother and I up on the counter and in front of my father declared him the Devil. My mom denies this and I don't remember that event but something was the last straw. We moved from the ranch when I was 5. We moved into her parents house. Bright lights, bright Salt Lake City. My dreams of being a rodeo queen were shattered.

to be continued.
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Old 01-22-2008, 05:09 AM   #64 (permalink)
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You should be an essayist...this is the kind of stuff I write often, but with less democracy and religion and more puberty.

Have you read Sarah Vowell? This is just like her line of stuff--I loved reading what you wrote!

In my mind, I saw your Mom as the mother in "Waterboy" calling your Dad 'Da Debble."



-Mike
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Old 01-22-2008, 07:15 AM   #65 (permalink)
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You have no idea what that means to me. Just no idea. I love to write. My highschool English teacher wanted me to go into journalism but did I listen? Of course not! Not independent me.

The personal journals that I keep are more along the lines of Sex in the City or um (blush)forum magazine. They get THAT detailed. They are brutal. Let's see:

Getting over Jim: A series of stories about a man who didn't want me. I was obsessed with this man in my early twenties. He told me that we were meant to be friends. "Don't mess this up" he begged me "I want to know you when we are eighty." Well I decided he was going to be my first and I persued him. It took me a year but eventually it was done. He was drunk enough for both of us. I inadvertantly gave him the nickname of "cornflake boy" and it stuck.

I did eventually realize he was right. We were meant to be friends. We still are today. I've known him for 14 years and despite my boyfriends protests' I still take his calls every few months.

There are letters to my sperm donor. And Gemini/Oz journals that detail the whole 3 year affair. I just didn't want to forget. Ash will want to know one day. I might need it in court, ya never know and I hope I never do.(dare you to ask me what nd stands for) I'm a born again raisin girl.

And then,
Three journals about a love who dumped me on CHRISTMAS. He was 10 years my junior. I loved him beyond reason. I've never fallen so fast and hard for anyone. I never said "I Love You" as quickly. He hurt me deeply and I decided to "use my power for evil" We are not in contact. The journals are not finished. They should be the easiest. We lasted five months. He has now been with his current girlfriend for almost 4 years. She is 3 years younger then he is and has NO kids. That was our major issue. He still hangs out with my best friend and her hubby sometimes. His new gf has wanted to meet me if I ever make my way back to Utah. I know I would get along with her. It's against my creed to hate a fellow Tori fan. I wish them well. Nothing negative lingers. The storys just won't come.

And about my current boyfriend. No one has ever loved me as much or treated me as good. Not a word. Not a peep. That's normal. It all comes pouring out from a place of anger or hurt when I write about men. That why I'm attempting to go waaay back. That part needs to heal.

I don't usually share the storys that litter my dream journals but I have a journal for almost every Tori album. Choirgirl is my favorite. I actually meet and heal with my friends at the Choirgirl Hotel. C who suffered a miscarriage. Sperm donors wife meets me there. We have to travel through Destinys Labrinth. I love the imagery there is to draw from and the rooms I have created there.

Currently I am traveling with Clyde/Persephone Pip/Artemis Isabel/Athena Santa/Aphrodite. I met Isabel at a moveon.org rally and she eventually introduces me to the other girls. My favorite part is standing in front of Santas mirror and how I see myself through her eyes. Beautiful. Wrapped in her golden glow. They take me through (you guessed it) GARDENS. Clyde's Desert Garden. Isabel's Greenhouse Pip's rock garden. Aphrodite's Rose Garden. Each place hurts, heals, nutures, tears apart. I've been stuck with Clyde in the underworld for quite a while now. Slowly removing the tiny ruby stones, shaped as pomegranite seeds, that Hades erected to wall us in.

Writing in the continuing dream journals is what heals me. I don't do it often enough.

I've also been writing journals for Ashton since I was pregnant with him. I'm dreadfully behind this year.

Writing is my thearpy. I would do it regardless but I'm glad you enjoy reading it Mike.
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Old 01-22-2008, 08:20 AM   #66 (permalink)
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Oh Manda,

I love your depth. We would have been good friends in high school. (You probably would have been in trouble with me, too...I spent much time in the principal's office...my grandmother was the assistant principal, but that's a story for another time...)

As I go back in time to write biographical stuff, it tends to be about running away, finding sex tapes in my buddies parents' closet, wearing underwear on my head and riding around the driveway on my bike, or being proud of the fact that I knew the word "fallopian" in the 6th grade.

I'm not too mystical, though there's a mythological thread through a novel I wrote years ago, where I changed the story of Orion to fit my intellectual needs. (Artemis made an appearance...but as vengeance...)

I've been thinking of writing a book of essays related to this WLS experience. I've started a couple already, and have a theme and format conjured. I tend to go through spurts though, followed by dry spells where I write nothing.

As for the concerts...I'll look up what I've got and let you know...maybe we can do a couple of switcheroos...

-Mike
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Old 01-22-2008, 11:19 AM   #67 (permalink)
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I graduated class of 1991. Almost coming up on my 20th year reunion. WOW. I'm getting old.

I won't be attending. I graduated from Intermountain Christain School. Enough said.

"Never going back again to crucify myself again never going back again to crucify my land never going back again to crucify myself girls never going back again to crucify myself everyday..."

I was a completly different person during that time. It took me 4-6 years to find myself (coming out of the cell in my brain) and later the mystical Goddess played a huge role in that.

Tori opened the door for me. I loved her first two cd's but would skip Crucify, God, Icicle. etc They made me extremely uncomfortable. When I learned her father was a minister I was amazed. Why did she have no fear of damnation? Why was she not scared of missing the rapture?

sperm donor introduced me to a book store named The Golden Braid. I would spend hours hunting down books that called to me. It was my oasis. I soon found other stores, Dancing Kranes and Gaia that I would later introduce him to.

When Boys for Pele was released I didn't immediate connect to the music. It was raw and angry and I couldn't quite see into it. I absorbed some songs immediatly but others just left my jaw on the floor. I started to read about the Volcano Goddess Pele. I wanted to understand the complicated bloodline of this intense album. One Goddess led to another Goddess and I was absorbing aspects of our lady and the power in all of us.

I started to notice and connect with nature more. I moved my functional futon to the front living room making it my studio where a beautiful bay window let in natural light. My now back private bedroom was dedicated to creating sacred space. I constructed an altar and started shaping a fairie circle.

On January 23, 1997 a local radio station announced they would be broadcasting a Tori Amos concert in it's entirity. A benefit for RAINN in New York. I tried to be gracious in ushering my friends out. Some were fellow fans who wanted to stay. I felt this had to be done on my own. I hurried to Golden Braid for items to make my altar special. I selected candles with elements of earth, air, fire, and water. Fairie incense for spirit. Content that I had all I needed. I went outdoors to search out ingredients to blend into my fairie circle. It was almost complete.

It was dusk when I arrived home. The in between time. I hurried to my room and began to place the items where they wanted to go. I lit the candles and lay in the middle of the circle.

The music transported me to another space. I felt I was floating but I was so heavy and weighed down. The lit candles seemed to hover below me. I let go. I just let everything go. I shook with grief. I sobbed. I understood the very tip of what this album was trying to portray. You can take and take from someone but ultimatly it is you alone you have to face. You can steal mens' energy. You can be a vampire out for blood. Where does that get you in the end? You can give and give until you have no more. Where does that get you in the end? The sadness in Toris' voice was palable. You could hear how somber her tone was without seeing her face.

I still return to this performance whenever there is something I need to let go of. The show was later released in vhs format. What she was experiencing that night was heartbreaking. Having written an autobiography in 2005 the messages that she was miming that night have became crystal clear. It must have been a nightmare for her. How brave to share her pain. To let music transport her so others could have release.

So thats why I am so mystical mr mike. I have to be in order to survive. I consider myself a backslidden wiccan and a born again pagan.

And of course,
A Recovering Christain.
I wear my shirt with pride.

And hey, I understand what you mean about spurts. I can go quiet for months. I jumped waaay ahead of my story here but hey anything for a fellow toriphile.
So would we have been friends in highschool? lol I was a self righteous prude. lol Are we friends now.? Abso freaking lutely and the present is what counts right?

I wanna read your novel!!! sounds facisnating.


"seems we keep getting the story twisted so where's neil when you need him deck the halls it's you again it's you again somewhere someone must know the ending. Is she still pissing in the river now? Heard she'd gone and moved into a trailer park."
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Last edited by Persephone; 01-22-2008 at 11:24 AM. Reason: forum kept eating my post just wanted some there
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Old 01-23-2008, 08:02 AM   #68 (permalink)
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Default For reference in the workplace

LILITH

The only passage in the Bible that refers to Lilith is Isaiah 34:14 and in most versions she is well hidden. The King James version describes her as a screech owl:
"The wild beasts of the desert shall also meet with the wild beasts of the island, and the satyr shall cry to his fellow; the screech owl also shall rest there, and find for herself a place of rest."

The only versions that refer to her as Lilith is the Jerusalem and New American translations.

Other versions label her as night monster, vampires, night hag, night . In the
Vulgate Bible of the Catholic church Lamia is used.

The idea that Adam had a wife prior to Eve may have developed from an interpretation of the Book of Genesis and its dual creation accounts; while Genesis 2:22 describes God's creation of Eve from Adam's rib, an earlier passage, 1:27, already indicates that a woman had been made: "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them." The text places Lilith's creation after God's words in Genesis 2:18 that "it is not good for man to be alone". He forms Lilith out of the clay from which he made Adam, but the two bicker. Lilith claims that since she and Adam were created in the same way, they were equal, and she refuses to "lie below" him.

In the Kabbalah, Lilith was created prior to Adam.

From A passage in the 13th century document called the Treatise on the Left Emanation.

And the Serpent, the Woman of Harlotry, incited and seduced Eve through the husks of Light which in itself is holiness. And the Serpent seduced Holy Eve, and enough said for him who understands. And all this ruination came about because Adam the first man coupled with Eve while she was in her menstrual impurity – this is the filth and the impure seed of the Serpent who mounted Eve before Adam mounted her. Behold, here it is before you: because of the sins of Adam the first man all the things mentioned came into being. For Evil Lilith, when she saw the greatness of his corruption, became strong in her husks, and came to Adam against his will, and became hot from him and bore him many demons and spirits and Lilin. (Patai81:455f)

In other words: EVE WAS FRAMED

Ever since the days of Eden
Apples have been man's desire.
How overjoyed I am to think, sir,
Apples grow, too, in my garden.

The Victorian poet Robert Browning re-envisioned Lilith in his poem "Adam, Lilith, and Eve". First published in 1883, the poem uses the traditional myths surrounding the triad of Adam, Eve, and Lilith. Browning depicts Lilith and Eve as being friendly and complicitous with each other, as they sit together on either side of Adam. Under the threat of death, Eve admits that she never loved Adam, while Lilith confesses that she always loved him:

Lilith in Wicca

Lilith is viewed as the embodiment of the Goddess, a designation that is thought to be shared with what these faiths believe to be her counterparts: Inanna, Ishtar, Asherah, Anath and Isis. According to one view, Lilith was originally a Sumerian, Babylonain, or Hebrew mother goddess of childbirth, children, women, and sexuality who later became demonized due to the raise of patriarchy. Other modern views hold that Lilith is a dark moon goddess on par with the Hindu Kali.




"Adams lips said Eve, but in his heart it was Lilith."
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Old 01-23-2008, 05:00 PM   #69 (permalink)
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Default mind/body connection

It's slowly dawning on me that for years I ignored the messages my body was sending me.

I concentrated on my spirit and my intuition. I struggled through pain. I ignored when I was full and kept savoring taste.

I've been in pain for a few days. Not only in regard to my foot but also severe cramps. Today I heard:

Rest....heal....Don't hobble. I let go and did.

Guilt keeps creeeping up. It always will. Not a day goes by when I don't feel guilty about something big or small. I dug out my copies of "Slacker Mom" and "Confessions of a Slacker Mom" by Muffie Mead-Ferro. I know that guilt is programmed into me and my DNA but I don't need any additional emotions piled on from society.

My sister in law heard second hand what was going on and called to check up on me. I told her I was relatively sure it was not an obstruction. We then began to discuss mind/body connection, or lack thereof.

She told me I needed to get outside by myself each day. And be by MYSELF.
"No D, No Ashton and NO F****** TORI." She slowly stressed.

I need to find my circle of trees. My sacred space. I need to make that connection with my body.

I know it's going to be difficult but I also know it is needed and I can do it.
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"The soul-quake happened here in a glass world.....particle by particle she slowly changes...."
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Old 01-24-2008, 05:23 PM   #70 (permalink)
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Default Link for Mike

http://www.keyboardmag.tv/

Artist

Tori Amos


ask me anything about cell phones. Computers are still trial and error.


"Clyde hides alot....she hides."
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"The soul-quake happened here in a glass world.....particle by particle she slowly changes...."

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