"Girl Disappearing" - Page 24 - ThinnerTimes

Persephone · 09-17-2008, 12:17 AM

Oh hello from this stranger again......Every time I drop in I end up not writing anything because I simply don't know where to start.

But tonight I have time on my hands (about 8 hours worth) so I'm gonna blog it all out.

As far as medical goes....I had my CT scan on friday. I had to drink two bottles of Barium (gag) and they ran some Iodine through an IV. I'm not good with IV's at all and had a bit of a panic attack. The Iodine can hit you and make you feel like you can't breathe. I don't have any results back yet and I don't know when to expect them. However the pain has lessened and it was just to make sure everything is ok.

My kiddo turned EIGHT on Sunday. It amazes me how quickly time passes. But now I'm getting personal so I will direct you to my blog. I must issue a warning in advance....it is likely to be disjointed and difficult to follow. That's just kind of where I am right now.

I'm not really dealing with change so well....I'm happy with my weight loss. It just feels as if I'm walking around in someone else body and that I'm "borrowing" it.....I don't know to explain it any better then that. Sometimes I will randomly catch my reflection in the glass and be shocked that it's me.

My weight loss has slowed down considerably and I've not only dropped the ball here but I haven't been going to Curves either. I watched the Biggest Loser tonight and remarked that "I need a Julian or Bob." But I can kick my own ass and get to the gym......there is just SO much going on and I am so simply OVERWHELMED with just getting through daily life.

But anything that comes easy is rarely worth it.....

Ok off to browse and catch up on how everyone else is doing (I've missed you guys...) and then to blog.....

Vim&Vigour · 09-17-2008, 09:41 AM

Hej Pea!
Welcome home! Good to see you around. One step at a time, right?! Gently does it and think positive..
Will turn to your blog soon.
Cheers for now,
Vim

Godsblessedme · 09-17-2008, 02:10 PM

well its about time missing person! i'm glad your back do you have a computer now at home

BiGMerf · 09-17-2008, 02:27 PM

welcome back

, nice to meet ya

Persephone · 10-04-2008, 05:10 PM

^Thanks all.

So ok I admit it. I'm selfish right now. I don't really know how to have this online persona and live my in real life at the same time. So I'm going to continue this pattern of dropping in every once in a while.

Sorry if if offends.

So in regards to my weight loss. I am losing and gaining the same fing 5 lbs. I range between 159-164. I've been blaming it on the birth control. Today I actually broke the barrier and weighed in at 158. 3 lbs away from CENTURY CLUB.

Today I went to work out at Curves and my Curves location has officially closed. There was a note on the door saying that due to personal and family issues the location had closed and that the Tempe location would honor any and all contracts. Well.....gas has gone down...but not enough to drive to Tempe. I went to the Curves that is located by my work and did my 45 minutes there but did not feel comfortable. I believe the time has come to join the YMCA. I HAVE to do something.

Real life sucks as well and despite my 6% raise (partially to maintaining an outstanding rating and partially to being promoted to specialist staus) is not making a dent. I realize that life is hard for everyone right now but it's hitting me especially hard.

Dumb Dan bounced a car payment for the month that HE had the car. I guess he thinks he can live rent free and drive the car for free. NOPE. I think I will have to take him to court. I know that life isnt fair but it is going to be as fair as I can possibly make it.

I am going to post some new pics. P got a new camera while he was on vacation. He was gone 9 days and it was HELL. I have never been that kind of woman. I'm usually content to have my time and space to myself.

Hmmmm.....new man, new outlook????

Life will get better. I just have to hang on.

Godsblessedme · 10-04-2008, 06:18 PM

hey girl i thought dumb dan took the car? but if its in your name shouldnt you get it back? or did you? well you'll love the Ymca and so will A

Persephone · 10-11-2008, 10:44 AM

He DID take the car and I got a beautiful PT Cruiser GT convertible. Leather interior. She was beautiful and I named her BIG WHEEL....and then I had to give her back. My income wasnt enough to pay both car payments should he have defaulted. Dumb Dan couldnt refinance on his own. I guess it turned out ok. B wheel guzzled gas. She was a turbo and I would most defin TURBO. And whenever Tori hit a certain pitch, the stereo would automatically turn off. I still feel sad whenever I see a PT, but I'm grateful to have a car. The malibu is still in both our names still and because he bounced that car payment I'm not in a position to refi right now either. AND he most likely would have defaulted. He's such an ass. He always took advantage of me and felt he was so entitled to everything I guess I shouldnt be a bit surprised.

I told him that I was taking him to court and so he unwillingly gave the Malibu back. He didn't have a leg to stand on because I was the one who had the trade in and down payment and made the car payments. I still may take him to court....why should I pay for the month he drove it??? He's made a total of 1.5 car payments.

Or I could chalk it up to experience and just let go. I am happy. Sometimes you have to know what you don't want before you find what you DO want. And I have the man I want. I am actaully (gasp) engaged. The actual date if set far in the future...11-11-2011....I think it will take me at least that much time to get used to the idea. I know I will be one of those "slacker wifes"

and I know he's kinda ok with it. Ash adores him. Pics soon (promise) I just need to find the cable for the digital camera.

As far as my weight loss (or lack thereof) I'm still hanging out at 158. Perhaps Mike could send some good Karma my way.

Ash starts his swimming lessons today at the Y so I may join there but I may just use the treadmill at my apt complex then hop in the pool for a swim. I've got to do something. These last 30-40 lbs are NOT going to come off easily. I'm gonna have to fight.

Godsblessedme · 10-11-2008, 11:08 AM

girl all i gotta say is that you've titled your blog correctly "girl disappearing" haha stop being a stranger! I'm glad Dan gave the car back what a twit! yeah pictures are worth alot here you know that sista!

fisher1000 · 10-11-2008, 11:53 AM

You know that Liz and I got married on 11/11. It's a day full of good karma and vibes...

I love that you're happy.

Did you get the Montreux CD yet? It came out a couple of weeks ago...Tori's voice is just wonderful...

-Mike

Josephine · 11-09-2008, 02:04 AM

I've been thinking about you, Deb, and Mike a lot!! Update please! xoxo