Cindy's Diary.... - Page 38 - ThinnerTimes

Josephine · 07-01-2008, 09:46 AM

Cindy, I'm sitting here bawling. Oh man, I definitely think that your father visited you in your dream. Maybe he didn't speak because he knows that he can't speak to you REALLY, so he wants you to understand the only comfort he knows how to give at this point.. with his spiritual touch, and with the memories he sends to you. It's very comforting what he's done for you. He sounds like a very lovely man.

FutureFitGirly · 07-01-2008, 10:33 AM

Hi Cindy!

I dont know if you wanted people to respond to this or if you just wanted it to be in your journal BUT.....

I lost my dad when I was 13. Really young, but still old enough to really know him before he passed. I have visits from him in my dreams. Less now that I'm getting older. I always either hear his voice and laugh or see him from a distance. Never both, its weird. Its comforting...He's making sure I dont forget him!!

It does get easier and easier. Now that I'm 25 (took awhile) I can openly talk about him. Remember the good times...along with the bad... But I have to be honest there are the "bad days." I have lost it many times during the father daughter dance at weddings. But thats ok. It's ok to miss him and want him here even if where he is now.. "in a better place"

But back to the dreams. If I go a couple months without a "visit" I get a little nervous but he always shows up. Once I asked him out loud if the guy I was with at the time was right for me. He showed up in my dream and told me like it is! needles to say the guy wasnt the one!

People may think I'm crazy but hey its what gets us through this crazy life!

You'll be ok, Promise. Keep his memory alive.

Cinerbelle · 07-01-2008, 10:51 AM

Yes yes yes...replies are great, they let me know I'm either a) not crazy or b) not the only crazy here!!

Robin W · 07-01-2008, 11:33 AM

I am grinning ear to ear just knowing that you got your visit! That is so cool. You're not crazy (and neither am I, thank you very much!). Why didn't he talk? Who knows but the thought that he's with his dad and wanted to bring him along is just so cool. Now I could use a few visits from my long lost loved ones. Will you ask your dad to send them my way, please? LOL

Cinerbelle · 09-10-2008, 10:01 AM

I haven't been around in awhile.... the longest break from the forum that I have ever had actually.

We found out that my MIL has colon cancer in July and since then our family has been on an emotional roller coaster. She had a 9mm tumor removed from her intestine. She has Stage 3C and begins chemo next week and it will continue for 6 months. My MIL is more of a Mother to me then my own Mother has ever been, this has been rough for my Hubby and I....but I try to remain strong for him and not let him see me upset.

We have had 3 other friends tell us that they have cancer in the past 2 months. I have not known anyone with cancer since I was 15 and all of a sudden there are 4. One of our friends is going to be fine. One has been told to get their affairs in order because they only have a 10% chance of survival and the other one has just finished her bone marrow transplany and everything is looking good. It is all very scary and emotional.

I am officially 2 1/2 years out from surgery and am maintaining my weight loss just fine... even through all the recent stress and eating for comfort. I have a lump in my armpit that I have to get looked at next week. I know it is either a cyst or an infected lymph node, but with all of the recent cancer scares...deep down I am a little worried. No matter what, I know they are going to cut this grape sized lump out and I am NOT happy about that. I am a TOTAL wimp.

Football season is here, so I am officially single again.

I miss my Hubby with a passion this time of year, but the kids and I love going to the games and cheering him and his team on! My MIL has always driven over 80 miles (one way) to be at his games and this year she probably won't make it to very many. That will be rough on my kids. She is coming to tomorrows game since she is feeling good right now, but with chemo starting next week...who know's how she will be feeling.

I am sure I am missing a ton of update info, but I am at work and better get back to it. I hope all of you are doing great!

Vim&Vigour · 09-10-2008, 10:13 AM

Wow Cindy!
Good to have you back but indeed what scary news!
Just a pointly reminder that we need to "always" keep our house in order - one never knows what lies on our doorstep!
I'm glad you are getting your own worries sorted. Not knowing is stressful!
Well done for keeping your eating in check, especially under the circumstances.
Cheers,
Vim

LyndasRoom · 09-10-2008, 10:23 AM

Cindy,
It's so good to 'see' you. Sad to hear your family is having a hard time...your post motivated me to check in with my mom this morning.

katzz87 · 09-10-2008, 10:34 AM

Sorry you're going through all this! My Dad had colon cancer also. I'm very glad to hear that your MIL is having the chemo...my family has learnt the hard way that they should (especially in colon cancer) do CHEMO and/or RADIATION.

Just wanted you to know that because of your post I am going to see my doctor for some bleeding I've been having that I truly feel is related to constipation...but was concerned because of my father's colon cancer (you know those what-if's)...and I log onto TT and the first post is yours! So...thanks for the push!

My prayers are with you and your family/friends!

Cathy

Robin W · 09-10-2008, 11:11 AM

I'm so sorry to hear about all the bad health news you've been experiencing with your loved ones recently. I've been worried about you since you hadn't been online in a long time and now I see that was with good reason! Wishing you some peace of mind and sending cyber hugs your way. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

jerseygrl684 · 09-10-2008, 12:32 PM

i misssssssed you most. i updated you a lil bit in texts.. but i hope u are doing well..

thank god for the other btch on the forum came backk..