Shetaz0028

I have been in a state of deep depression the last few days. Crying my self into a gasping stupor and living with my head in a paper bag.



On January 5, 1991 (two days before the Iraq war fully broke out) I gave birth to a 17in 5lb 2oz baby girl. She was still borne and I crashed 'coz I had no idea how I was going to tell hubby that I killed our baby when he was walking in oil fires. Needless to say the docs fought tooth and nail and my little peanut will be turning...

This is totally off topic but, something that I battle every year. 1/31/09 will be the 5th anniversary of my mothers death.

Mom was an amazingly beautiful angel inside and out. Her strength, compassion, unconditional love, and understanding ment the world to me. Though I didn't tell her before she passed on.

The relationship between me and mom was not always golden but, there were definatly times when the road disappeared. Daddy always said it was because we...

Well tomorrow I meet with the Nurse Practicitioner, NUT, and shrink for my eval. It's a 4 hour appointment for them to decide if I'm a candidate.

I have always been the kind of person to prepare for the end of the world and hope for not all that bad but, I am sooooo scared of them telling me no tomorrow that I can't get anything done.

I don't own a scale but, know I have dropped weight since I made my appointment because my wedding ring fell off last night. 2 weeks...

Today seems to be one of those overwhelming ones. I'll start with the good:

I love my job. I work on a project job and love everything about it. We are currently building the new Boston Blue Line subway trains. Duckie, if you ride on em you can think of me.

Now the bummer. My oldest daughter (will be 20 in Dec) got in a fight with my youngest daughter (will be 18 in Jan) and hit her. Violence is not allowed in my house so our oldest daughter is being moved...

I had a friend that I have been very close with for about 15 years come and visit me this weekend. We are close enough that I can tell her that she needs to take a shower cause she's funky and she calls me Billy and lets me know it's time for a wax.

Anyway, I had told her of my decision to have WLS and she started crying. She is so happy for me and said that she has missed me so much.

Then she brought to my attention something that I did not realize before. She...