LaChica707

Sometimes I think that something terrible is gonna happen to me.. like right before I get the surgery or something.. and then I won't be able to have it... or sometimes I think this is just a dream and its never gonna happen. I've been the big chubby girl my WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE... and its just kinda hard to imagine.. all of this.. not being diabetic, being healthier... being skinnier. I have this one untie..that just ERKS THE CRAP outta me... thru my whole childhood..everytime I saw her during family...

OK I PUT MY "ON BREAK" sign UP for a reason.. BUT DUMB MOFO'S HERE AT MY WORK SEEM TO THINK IT DOESN'T MATTER!!! AND THAT HIGHLY IRRITATES ME!! I usually walk during break but today I had to do some research on some other stuff.. and boom - THERE'S ALWAYS ONE DUMBASS that has to flutter over and start talking... and I tell them I'M ON BREAK and for some odd reason.. they can't comprehend it?? WTF!! IS YOUR MIRACLE HEARING AID NOT WORKING TODAY? DO YOU HAVE YOUR CONTACTS IN!? uggh.. GET...

Yay!!! i'm under 200 I'M SOOOO FRUCKIN HAPPY ABOUT THAT!!! I weigh in every morning and since I started the 1200 calorie diet.. i've seen a consistent drop in my weight. GOOD GOOD GOOD! and I'm working out an average of and hour or more a day. I know I'm getting closer. I'm trying to just stay positive about everything.. I don't want any negativity comming my way.. if I hear or see it.. I shut it down immediately. I won't let that hinder me.. Especially the JACK ASS EX HUBBY who doesn't know when...

ok I havent' had a cigarette in 2 days.. I feel pretty good about that.. sometimes I think in my head.. awww just one won't hurt.. But I NEED TO REALLY THINK cuz that one will just open up a door to hundreds.. so... I'll stay away..
I think it kinda sucks that everything that I did like doing.. has to stop..Food, Alcohol, Smokin, I know its soo worth the stop but DAMN!! oooh the sacrafices we make in life. I'm trying to look at this as a Phaze of life.. and once i'm over it.. i'm over it.....

I went thru the pre-op class, I Met with the Surgeon. Now.. all I have to do I lose 13 more lbs, meet with the Psychologist, and when I lose the 13 call my Doctor and tell her I'm READY! ...
Ok the reality of all of this is kinda hard for me to fathom.. I KNOW this is gonna happen, I KNOW I CAN lose the 13lbs... its just...
i've been pretty much overweight my whole life.. I wouldn't consider myself MASSIVELY overweight, but didn't matter.. I'VE been ALWAYS a big girl. I've never...