Questions for the Post-op 18+ Months - Page 2 - ThinnerTimes

newthindale · 09-04-2004, 11:50 AM

Hi there everyone! I haven't posted in awhile. I was a bit overwhelmed by how much there was to read in here while I was away on vacation. But, I just have to add my two cents here as an "old timer" who is more than two years post op.

I consider myself, along with Suzanne, Woody, Bethie, Mudd, Barb, Debbie, Terry, Melanie, Heidi, and other folks a few years out, a success story. And, I know we all intend to keep it that away! Why are we successful? Well, I think it is in large part due to the wonderful support we have provided each other and also the support provided by Callery's office. Of course we have all heard of the failures now. There are failures in every endeavor in which humans partake. It's part of human nature not to listen to others who have gone before us. It's inevitable for some people. They want to eat those M&M's and they eat them. Damn the torpedos and full speed ahead! There go 50 pounds back on their bodies. Not me! I will not go there! And, I don't think it's right for us to chastise those people who are gaining back weight because of poor choices. I know that most of us have had struggles with gaining some weight back and have CHOSEN to change and go back to basics. We all have struggles, in fact. Not one of us is perfect after the honeymoon is over (first 6-10 months, more or less). All of the old behaviors are lurking. They strike at odd moments when we are emotionally, or physically exhausted. We must be alert and make choices which are healthy and include daily exercise, the magical words Melanie spoke of. We can't be perfect, but the tool of gastric bypass gives us a fighting chance. When we eat that candy/ice cream/fruit bar/whatever and become aware that we have made a mistake, we can stop. We can stop before it is the whole bag. Either our brains will engage and stop us, or our pouches will be full and stop us. Or, in many cases, we will start to feel crumby and that will stop us. That gives us time to think and make a CHOICE. That is the key word CHOICE!!! We now have a choice. We can succeed or fail and it is our choice.

So, choice and support are the keys to long term success, I believe. It comes down to that. If you have a hard time making the right choices, come back to us and we will help you. Don't be afraid of the folks who have failed. They aren't the majority, we, the successes, are the majority. Isn't that nice to know?

Dale 6/19/02 open with Dr. Callery. At goal for over a year!!

sandi · 09-04-2004, 12:25 PM

I know it's my post about my sister in law and her M&M's that caused her to gain back those 50 lbs that you remarked to Dale, and I have to reply, I DON'T chastise her!! I would never chastise her, I LOVE her, I feel badly for her that she DID make the wrong choices when it came to food, but I DO NOT intend to make those same wrong choices, I'm 16 years older than she is, and have been through a lot more hell when it comes to dieting and a lot more to get this surgery, and I'll be darned if I'll do ANYTHING to sabotage myself or ANYONE on here or HER, that have become my dear friends who have given the greatest support and who *I* intend to support, year in and year out. Yes, we, even though we're NEWBIES, we give good support too, you don't have to be a year or two out from surgery just to give good support if thats what you're saying.... if you're not, then I apologize right here in front of God and everybody, and I apologize for losing my temper, but I have 2 very good reasons, my friends know what they are!!! And if you read the forum you do too, and if you watch the weather you do too!!!! My husband, and my son....... If there was an emoticon that made tears, I'd place it here........

newthindale · 09-04-2004, 06:39 PM

Sandi,
I didn't say you were chastising your sister-in-law, I was just saying that, in general, we shouldn't do that. We should always realize that this eating problem/disorder/whatever you want to call it, is very pervasive and not easy to deal with, even with the medical tool we have received to help us.

No, you don't need to be over a year out to give support to people. I didn't mean it that way at all. I merely meant, since I was speaking in the category of over 18 months out, that those of us who are further out, and continue to be successful, do so because of both support and good choices. Not because they are further out from surgery. We all support the NEWBIES, even when we were NEWBIES. That goes without saying, because they need it the most. But, many doctors' offices don't maintain any type of support after the surgery, and we are so fortunate that even years out we still get help and support.

I haven't been able to keep up with all the posts I missed while I was out of town and also getting children ready for school, etc. I'm so sorry, Sandy, to hear about your husband's accident. I got to that after I had already posted on here. I'm glad he's doing better. What happened with your son? Is he in Florida? I just can't keep up. Sometimes I think I shouldn't be in here any longer because I can't keep up with all the different posts and subjects.

Dale 6/19/02 at goal

Tracie · 09-04-2004, 11:27 PM

Dale,

You should DEFINITELY be in here. We need all the support we can get...and we're even getting good at giving it. Thank you for all of your wise words...and hope to see more of them

sandi · 09-05-2004, 11:34 AM

I apologize Dale for taking what you were saying the wrong way!
I can only use the stress that's been going on here as my excuse and say that I'm just a VERY protective person of all my co-newbies I thought they were being maligned and here comes the mother lion syndrome ya know? I'm SO sorrrrrrry HUGS!!!!
And yes, my son Jeffrey IS in Florida, he hasn't even dug himself out from hurricane Charley yet and now he's going to have hurricane Frances piled on top of all of that!!! I just spoke with him, and he left home yesterday afternoon to go stay with friends, so, he wasn't at home alone like I thought he'd be, thank God!! They have no power again, but they DO have water this time! He sounded okay, even though the storm is there right now, as I type, he says that it's a huge storm, as hurricane's are, Lord knows, after living there 29½ years I've been through enough of them, they're very loud, lots of rain, lots lightning and palm trees bent over touching the ground and darkness during the daytime~ But, he's got such a funny sense of humor, as we were hanging up, I told him to be careful if he gets out to drive around, stay safe, he says, "Mom, I've been through these before, and I'll probably be through one again next weekend!!"
My son!!!!

bridgetgirl · 09-17-2004, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tracie

Dale,

You should DEFINITELY be in here. We need all the support we can get...and we're even getting good at giving it. Thank you for all of your wise words...and hope to see more of them

Dale I need you here, you are one of those I look to for advice, you older post ops are invaluable, priceless. I never looked at this thread until today because it requested advice from postops 18+ out, so I just didnt even go here...... but I just had to share with you that I would be saddened if you decided to no longer post here. i hope you stay.

PS Sorry that your thread got hijacked Peckale.... I had to speak up.