Due to this section I have changed my mind about surgery - Page 3 - ThinnerTimes

LyndasRoom · 03-12-2008, 08:26 AM

Lisa,
You have to make the best decision for yourself. I never had a problem losing the weight, it was always a matter of keeping them off. I would lose the 50, 75 pounds, and the minute I stopped being vigilant, they came back with friends. I am older than you, and felt that this was my only option at that point in time. You should know that there are many long term post oppers who don't participate here...they are out living their lives, and don't feel the need to participate. It seems to me that people who do have problems stick around, searching for support, as they should, but you never hear from the folks who are doing great. At 20 months out, and 110 lbs lost, I find that I need to be more vigilant than ever with diet and exercise, because those pounds are wanting to find their way back to me.
You have made an informed decision, I think you should discuss it with the surgeon before you make it final. You need to do what's right for you. Post oppers with no complications and good outcomes are not here as part of a propaganda machine, we have no agenda, other than keeping our success...and the support we find here is a huge part of that. I am a mother too, and if I had had the surgery at your age, when my child was that young, I would have had many better, more active years with my son. Best of luck to you, only you can make this choice. (((Lisa)))

weza215 · 03-13-2008, 10:21 AM

Hi again!
I have been researching the lapband forums due to the info from this forum and I'm reading more and more about how people wished they would have done the rny instead. I am back on the bandwagon due to all this good info. I'm very nervous but I had a long talk with my husband and he supports me 100% with this surgery and up til now he never voiced his opinion. I told him when he got home from work that I had changed my mind and he said that it was my decision but he just wanted to let me know that he has watched me try and try to lose this weight and in his opinion he feels this surgery would be the only way that I will accomplish this. So yes I am going to proceed with the preop but I can guarantee that I will change my mind again. I haven't been to any support meetings but I should attend one and ask all my questions so that's my plan. All I can say is this forum is wonderful and I feel blessed that everyone is able to say the good the bad and the ugly about this surgery and not get treated poorly. Thanks everyone and I will keep everyone updated. Lisa

rappaport · 03-13-2008, 10:29 AM

Very good Lisa. We all wobble back and forth a bit when making such a dramatic life-changing decision. Ultimately, the decision lies within you and you have to be honest with yourself. Any decision you make will be supported.

pgh3rivers · 03-13-2008, 11:28 AM

I have had trouble deciding on surgery. Originally I thought that the band was right for me. Now I am thinking the bypass. I was concerned with the amount of people who wrote about long term trouble with the band.

porshh951 · 03-13-2008, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VanessaSFL

Many times we are asked by newer posters what , if any, regrets we have?The ONLY regret I have, is that I didn't try one last time on my own.I did very well on WW, but when I stopped support I gained it back.

I guess I will be on Thinner Times posting on the Geriatric section

I understand what you are feeling, however I must say that I know now that I needed the tool that the surgery gave me.The tool forced me into a healthy lifestyle eating wise.I did not have the "will power" to do it on my own.Now if my tool would help me to exercise I would be in good shape

Best wishes in whatever you decide,

I am in the exact same boat. I would never regret having the surgery cause it gave me the willpower to finally make the much needed lifestyle change. Had I of not had the surgery I could not guarentee my success

lealphachienne · 03-13-2008, 08:16 PM

It is a choice and you made it based on informed and researched information. Many of us researched just as exhaustively and decided for the surgery. For some motivation, check out www.FatNoMore.com I met this lady and she has a few unique answers the weight dilemma. Even with surgery, to keep it off requires a shift in thinking and how you perceive yourself and the circumstances around you.

Good luck and keep us posted.

trinket · 03-14-2008, 04:58 AM

Hi Weza215

It is really excellent that you are researching matters properly according to your particular lifestyle/needs etc. We are all different and I hope my following explanation about how it has worked for me helps too.

Clutch
For me, the most important tool the surgery has given me is the 'clutch' mechanism on my food-intake. I never had this before - I could carry on eating when everybody else had long stopped - and the some! My stomach really did feel bottomless, which in turn made me a feel like a fat person mentally too.

Thinking thin
Now, by eating like a thin person, I am gradually starting to feel like a thin person mentally too. This represents a MAJOR shift in my whole being and I am having to adjust (I still put too much on the plate sometimes and have nightmares that I'll put all the weight back on - overnight!

)

Mind over matter?
Overall, this surgery has made me realise that Will Power (i.e. mental state) was definitley not enough for me because, no matter how determined I was mentally, I was constantly battling against my physical state i.e. a bottomless pit of a stomach. (I had plenty of Will Power - as do most yo-yo dieters - who keep dieting over and over again, despite having failed so many times!)

So, for me 'Mind over Matter' did not work whereas the Mind and Matter approach has worked.

Risk factors and weighing it all up
So far, I have been a problem free zone and have healed/adjusted well. However, there is a risk factor here as with most surgical procedure and yes, there can definitely be long term issues for some. When it came down to weighing it all up - I took the risk: I felt miserable, was not really enjoying my life, was dreading future obesity related problems and overall I don't think I was a really nice person to be around (which played a big part in my decision making process). So far it's been worth the risk and I absolutely love being a 'running, jumping and tumbling around with my kiddies' mum.

I hope the above at least makes sense and I wish you great success - however, you get there. XX

Gwen · 03-14-2008, 06:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trinket

Hi Weza215

It is really excellent that you are researching matters properly according to your particular lifestyle/needs etc. We are all different and I hope my following explanation about how it has worked for me helps too.

Clutch
For me, the most important tool the surgery has given me is the 'clutch' mechanism on my food-intake. I never had this before - I could carry on eating when everybody else had long stopped - and the some! My stomach really did feel bottomless, which in turn made me a feel like a fat person mentally too.

Thinking thin
Now, by eating like a thin person, I am gradually starting to feel like a thin person mentally too. This represents a MAJOR shift in my whole being and I am having to adjust (I still put too much on the plate sometimes and have nightmares that I'll put all the weight back on - overnight!

)

Mind over matter?
Overall, this surgery has made me realise that Will Power (i.e. mental state) was definitley not enough for me because, no matter how determined I was mentally, I was constantly battling against my physical state i.e. a bottomless pit of a stomach. (I had plenty of Will Power - as do most yo-yo dieters - who keep dieting over and over again, despite having failed so many times!)

So, for me 'Mind over Matter' did not work whereas the Mind and Matter approach has worked.

Risk factors and weighing it all up
So far, I have been a problem free zone and have healed/adjusted well. However, there is a risk factor here as with most surgical procedure and yes, there can definitely be long term issues for some. When it came down to weighing it all up - I took the risk: I felt miserable, was not really enjoying my life, was dreading future obesity related problems and overall I don't think I was a really nice person to be around (which played a big part in my decision making process). So far it's been worth the risk and I absolutely love being a 'running, jumping and tumbling around with my kiddies' mum.

I hope the above at least makes sense and I wish you great success - however, you get there. XX

Trinket!!!!

Again, my inability to put my thoughts into the written word has let me down when it came to my eagerness to reply to this Thread, and there you've done it again!!! Get out of my head Woman!!! Or no, stay and keep on posting - why do you disappear like that for weeks on end when I need you to verbalise for me?

This was something that I have struggled to put into words in my conversations with Vim - thanks for forming this phrase:

"Mind and Matter"

How amazing is that!

XXX

trinket · 03-14-2008, 08:43 AM

Wow Gwennie - I'm glad somebody - anybody - understood what I was trying to say. Great minds eh?

I think you are brilliant at expressing yourself and you are right, the mind/body thing is so difficult to explain.

One of my deepest regrets is the HUGE amount of Will Power I (we all) put into yo-yo dieting for all those years - over and over again only to be labelled by society as not having any 'Will Power'! Sad thing is that I believed this about myself - even though I knew deep down inside that Will Power wasn't the real problem. To be honest I probably regret the deep demoralisation this caused more than having been obese (which was bad enough!).

However, this surgery has confirmed to me that it wasn't a lack of Will Power that caused my 'dieting' failures, it was my constant battle between 'Mind and Matter' and it is this realisation that is the best ongoing WOW moment for me ever.

Yours, in harmony XX

Godsblessedme · 03-14-2008, 03:40 PM

beautiful trinket! i got alot of info from your response

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