Post Op questions/comments - ThinnerTimes

bigbearjeff · 09-21-2007, 06:39 AM

Hi Post Op people,

You are thinking to yourselves, “What is the pre-op bear doing in here?” Well first I wanted to say how proud I am of all of you. The fact that you did this shows your incredible courage and desire to better yourself. I am so impressed. I look at some of your pictures, and honestly my jaw just rests on the floor. I find myself mesmerized by “before and after” pictures. I know that might sound wacky. I look at the thin version of you and think to myself, “This is the real person”. This is the person that was hiding in there waiting to get out. I am curious now that time has passed do you have that same feeling? Like you were always this “thinner” person in this bigger body?

I notice with the ladies, that you all have amazing neck lines. The first thing I see are these amazing necks. I know that might sound crazy, but it is like a beacon. It seems to me that everyone has huge facial/neck changes. I also noticed a lot of you look much younger. Maybe it is that healthy glow.

I am curious to know how long it took your mind to catch up to your body? One of the things the Psychiatrist said to me is to “look at yourself in the mirror often”. He said that you need to get your mind to comprehend the changes. If not, you will walk around with the same “larger’ viewpoint. He probably phrased it more eloquently than that, but that is my version of it. But looking in the mirror is definitely not one of my current fun pastimes.

Almost everyone I talk to or read about that had this procedure said they would have done it again in a heartbeat. Most people say they feel better than ever.

I would like to hear in your words what you “miss” the most. This does not have to be a food item, but anything from your old life.

I also would like to know this. After your surgery, when did you really start to feel like you were in control of your life? Where things finally balanced out and you stopped worrying about the fact that your insides have been changed around etc.

When it comes to these types of things everyone has an “I wish someone had told me this beforehand” comment. I would love to hear some of the things you wish people had told you before the surgery.

The Bear that cares,

Jeff
329/321/220

ScootRider · 09-21-2007, 12:26 PM

Well, it is not quite as dramatic in the long term. Certainly those first six months are a roller coaster. But being two years out, I get a little chuckle at the excitement of preops. I was that way too.

You will find that down the road, life is not all that different than it was before. At least not for me. I am the same person who just weighs less. I think that's a good thing.

Toony · 09-21-2007, 01:00 PM

Good questions Jeff... I'll be sitting next to the big ol'bear, reading your answers - you post-oppers!!!

toony

Mavisavis · 09-21-2007, 01:41 PM

It took me literally ages for my mind to catch up with my body. Two major things helped me. The first was plastic surgery for the skin love handles my mind saw as "fat". The other thing I would do was try and catch very quick glimpses as I passed mirrors or windows to try and see my "real" interpretation as if it was not me.......we are hard on ourselves. I agree that the excitement wears down as you get used to being a normal size, but for me, not a day goes by that I don't reflect and be so very grateful.....just more quietly and introspectively now. The surgery changed my life from the inside out, but at the same time I am still "me" and life is still just life......cars break down, kids sass back, work crap happens, friends disappoint, dating still sucks, etc.

One thing I miss, in a weird way, is being able to use food and not have to worry about "getting fat". Life didn't change drastically after a few weeks of wild food abandon.......it was just my life as a fat person. Now I obsess much more about food and weight in general. I would almost say I live in fear of gaining, and I have crept up a few pounds. It remains a daily struggle.....hourly struggle even. I don't truly miss anything about my old life.

I have never had a time where I felt in control overall......I humbly admit that I will always deal with my food addiction. But I stopped viewing myself constantly as a bariatric patient probably around a year when I met goal and had plastics. I still see myself as part of the "family" and identify with others who have chosen surgery, but it's a smaller overall part of my identity. And truly, my body size is much less a part of who I am than when it was too big. I'm not sure if that makes sense.

I didn't have a lot of "I wish I'd have been told" moments......I was on this board getting info and asking questions. But there are still surprises in that we know the possibilities but have no idea which things we'll experience. I had no buyers remorse....but tons of nausea. I had not too bad of gas, but ooooweee the breath. I can tolerate sugar fairly well, but cut out the deep fried basically altogether. So, for as much as we share in this journey, we are each so unique. But absolutely it was probably the best decision I ever made for myself.

Mavisavis · 09-21-2007, 01:47 PM

Oh, one thing that popped in my mind that surprised me. I notice in general that some women, especially heavy women, are not as kind to me......men overall are nicer.....more willing to make eye contact or just smile (not in an attraction type way).

Duckie · 09-22-2007, 07:28 AM

I miss my boobs! lol