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  1. 17 likes
    So, as of this morning, I am officially 159lbs!! I've reached my goal weight, of 160lbs. I'm posting some of my before's and after's.. So at my highest weight, I was 292lbs.. Surgery Date I was 284lbs. I had surgery on August 1st of 2016, and I credit it has being one of the biggest and best decisions of my adult life. I am thrilled, my health is better, I am off my medications, I sleep well, and I can be active with my children. Regardless! Facial Changes in losing 130lbs : Body Changes in losing 130lbs : And a bonus - Wow look at my arms before! Yikes! (This is my gorgeous husband that has stood beside me for 15+ years, through this journey, three kids, and still took the time to draw a bath for me today, he's awesome) : And one more, Me at work :
  2. 17 likes
    At two months beyond my 4 year surgeversary, I'm at a new low weight today, 193 pounds. I like it a heck of a lot more than 360!
  3. 16 likes
    My grandson Harper He continues to be my motivation...every day!
  4. 15 likes
    In Grand Cayman. Size med Maurice dress..
  5. 14 likes
    Had a function last night, got a chance to get dolled up! ralph lauren 4p dress. I think the shoes are bcbg girls? This is my first "what are you wearing" I'm so excited!
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    Many postings here at TTF state that a person's long term success after weight loss surgery is dependent on the person developing a "new relationship with food." As this term frequently puzzles newbies, and even a few veterans who are struggling to get to their goal weight, I thought that it would be helpful to discuss what this term means and why it is so very important. In the 9 months or so after weight loss surgery, a person generally has relatively little "body hunger." This is called the honeymoon period as life is very good since losing weight is fairly easy and usually quite rapid. It is during this period of time that a person needs to break their old "bad" food habits and replace them with more healthy food habits. Among these healthy food habits are strict portion control, not drinking liquids with meals, eating lean protein first at meals, drinking lots of no calorie liquids, cutting carb consumption way down, and not eating unhealthy snacks. In addition, and perhaps even more important, a person needs to adjust why they eat food. More specifically, food should not be eaten for comfort, out of boredom, without thought (such as snacking while watching TV), to feel better, as a result of pressure to eat it from others, or for any other unhealthy reason. Instead, food should be viewed primarily as fuel that a body needs. Thus, a person should keep track of their grams of protein and oz of liquids every day to make sure that enough is consumed. Just as importantly, eating should be both slow and mindful. Slower eating helps to prevent both the discomfort that can happen after rapid eating and the unnecessary overconsumption of calories. So small bites, chew food throughly, and put your fork down frequently. Mindful eating means that you think about everything that you eat and decide if it is good to eat it before it goes on your plate or into your mouth. An example of mindful eating for me is on the rare occasions that I eat pizza, it is only one slice and I try hard to pick the smallest available slice. Another example of mindful eating is that at a buffet I serve myself very small servings of healthy foods that I enjoy and avoid eating any "trigger foods" - foods that once I taste them I am quite likely to lose control and overeat them such as potato chips and cookies. Mindful eating is also picking healthier alternatives; so if I want a salty snack I will eat a small serving of smokehouse flavored roasted almonds not cocktail peanuts or Doritos. To be clear, almost no foods are banned by mindful eating (especially once you reach goal weight), but portions of unhealthy foods should be small and consumed as part of an overall healthy diet. The only banned foods are foods that make you dump (for me, ice cream) and trigger foods. What do you all think?
  8. 13 likes
    Just dropped in to say hello. Life is good, hope all is well with you all. Moved back to NY last year, having fun, bought a new motorcycle, etc. down to 184 and a 34" waist. Down from 485 and a 72" waist. Seems like a lifetime ago! June 30 will be my 2 year surgiversarry. Never thought I'd be here..hahhah
  9. 13 likes
    At a conference so had to pack strategically. Daytime- Banana Republic size 6 camel slacks, Loft small cream blouse with gold trim, Liz Claiborne size 6 tweed blazer, nude and brown pumps. Dinner- same slacks with a rue 21 xs orange blouse and leopard print flats.
  10. 12 likes
    I agree with everything Res Ipsa said but this sentence the most. In my opinion, this is how we all got here - by using food for comfort. In addition to changing your relationship with food, you also need to find healthy ways to comfort yourself. Exercise, reading, music, other hobbies and interests, travel, etc. When you stop eating for comfort or to fill whatever voids you may have, you will need something to replace food. And things to fill the time you spent eating. If you don't, I think we are more likely to turn back to food to make us feel better. This seems like the perfect time to point out that transfer addiction is real. Several posts here about people who turned to booze and some to drugs after surgery. This certainly isn't the norm but something everyone pre and post op should be aware of because it can sneak up on you. I estimate I have about 10 hours a week in my life now that I spent eating pre-op. Once I didn't want to (and couldn't) eat like that anymore, I had some time to fill. I used it as an opportunity to try new things and spend more time on the hobbies I already had. I'm glad I had a plan for that in place before I had surgery, otherwise I think I would have struggled more post-op. Regarding triggers, I consider myself a food addict so I don't eat foods that make my brain light up like a Christmas tree. Doritos is at the top of that list.
  11. 12 likes
    med cut out sweater from a StitchFix box 10- Lee StyleUp trousers black flats
  12. 12 likes
    I'm a little late but on Sunday we wore 5k color run shirts! It was so much fun!
  13. 11 likes
    I'm 5 weeks out from surgery. I hit my stall in the 4th week and actually gained 3 pounds. My stall has broken and I'm back to losing again. I decided to show my progress so far with a side by side face pic. I'm 44 lbs. down since surgery and many more to go until goal weight.
  14. 11 likes
    The Gods are challenging you. Those rascals also magically pulled the paper towels into the dog water bowl. Really it is those mischevious Gods, not you, who caused all this. Forgive yourself. Perhaps you are, through worry, making the stresses worse. I sometimes imagine things to be more severe than they are, creating mental mischief for myself. I tell myself that when I am late with a task the email from a boss will be horrible, but usually it is just fine, "When do you think you will have it ready"... a reasonable query, not terrible. You imagine that your weight loss is forever over. No doubt that is true and the laws of physics and biology are no longer true, at least in your apartment. I too would be angry at the world if the laws of physics and biology had decided to leave my personal quarters when the Gods had banished them. To rephrase your note, Your boss sent an okay email despite your having to take time off at the worst time. You have lost a bunch of weight and it is bouncing around but you are down 38.5 lbs. and you will continue to lose, since the Gods can't disobey the laws of physics and biology for very very long. Your husband is the world's best person (who married you despite your wicked trickery in luring him into what he thought would be wedded bliss), and who despite the risks (brave soul) was willing to enter the kitchen. (It's in the marriage contract, actually, he had no choice). Reassure the dog, fix the kitchen wall where the door hit it a bunch of times, text the husband that your will not be slicing him up into little pieces with kitchen knives, and then forgive yourself for whatever misdeeds these represent. Put out a piece of cheese to appease the Gods (they like cheese, being similar to mice but not as smart). Your boss likes you well enough to send you an ok note, your husband loves you, and the dog knows it is beloved. Go for a walk and revel in the inherent beauty of the universe.
  15. 11 likes
    OK, inspired by @Dtrain84, I'll post a side by side. My first progress pic posted here
  16. 11 likes
    Hello all just a quick update. I went in for surgery at 8:00am. Woke up with no surgical or gas pain, but horrific nausea I didn't think it was ever going to go away, but it finally did around 7:00pm. I couldn't drink much of anything until after it went away. I am starting to feel more normal right now. Struggling to take my meds, but I'm used to throwing the whole handful in my mouth and chugging water. I have to take one every 45 minutes now. Other than that, things are good. I have had a few issues with my blood sugar and blood pressure going high, and needing a magnesium infusion, but I'm not too surprised at either. My surgeon biopsied my liver, so I'm a little concerned about that. I just wanted to let you all know how I made out Thank you all so much for your support and friendship on this journey so far! I'm gonna try to sleep now, but I'll ttys
  17. 11 likes
    There is so much freedom in this picture. 6 months ago I would have been worried that I wouldn't fit on the ride. Honestly I may not have. Yesterday I got on a free fall roller coaster and wow what a thrill. I have allowed my weight to control this adventurous heart way too long. As of this morning I'm 92 pounds down. I still have quite a bit to go but I'm thankful for every ounce that God has allowed me to lose! Thank you God for adventure, roller coasters, and fun family times!
  18. 11 likes
    Wore this to church on Mother's Day. Willie Smith capris, size 12, Twenty-one satin top, size large, and crocheted cardigan, size l. Hanging in there. Almost off steroids, yay. Maintained weight loss for the most part. Gained three lbs total. Getting back to normal.
  19. 11 likes
    Not really what are you wearing, but this is a picture from the hot springs in the golan heights on the Syrian border.
  20. 11 likes
    It has been quite a while since I have posted. But I feel like I need to get back into a support group setting. I've recently (in the past 3 months or so) have found myself falling into old habits and have subsequently gained 8-10 lbs. To some people, that's not much. But I started to worry that that 8-10 pounds (depending on the day) would be a slippery slope to gaining 50+ lbs. So last week, I completed the 5-day pouch test and started to re-incorporate protein shakes into my diet, cut the carbs back and really focused on protein. I lost about 3 pounds in 5 days. I didn't go through this surgery to be "skinnyish" for a year. I did this to change my life both short-term and long-term. At 19 months post op, I'm currently sitting at 186 pounds. (Last week I was 189) and wear a size 8 pants and large top. My goal for this summer is to get my butt in gear and really incorporate regular exercise into my daily/weekly routine; to utilize our new grill and enjoy lean grilled protein and some steamed veggies; and maybe, just maybe - come close to my goal weight. I'm ok if I don't hit the #, but I want to be healthier. I don't want to feel like a failure that I have this amazing tool and am not using it properly. I guess this is me saying, I'm back! I can't wait to catch up on what everyone has been doing and all the newbies.
  21. 11 likes
    Hey friends, I got tired of my pants flapping around and having to hike them up, so I went closet diving. Now proudly wearing a pair of pants a size smaller!
  22. 10 likes
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    OK. @Dtrain84 and @Jen581791 have inspired me to show my progress pictures. The first picture is me the day of my surgery and the second pic is today.
  24. 10 likes
    I really wanted to have a huge announcement before I posted but I decided to go small with this one. I wanted to say that I’m under 200 pounds for the first time in decades but I’m still 2 pounds away from that victory. I also wanted to tell you that I’ve lost 100 pounds but I haven’t. I guess I could tell you all these things but they just wouldn’t be true…..YET. I’m going to keep on keeping on. The under 200 pound thing is kind of a big deal for me. Some of you would have a heart attack if you were 150. I get it. I know 200 still has me in big girl status and I’m okay with that. I just want to be able to say I’m One hundred and blady blah pounds. It’s frustrating to see the scale stall when I’m putting the work and effort into getting it off. Even through the craptastic wait for the scale to drop, I’m learning things. I’m thankful for that. It’s bad when you don’t see results. However, it’s really bad when you close everything out and soak in your pity. I’m just not going to do that this week. So what am I learning?? Well the first thing I’m learning is you don’t live a healthy lifestyle to be rewarded. You live a healthy lifestyle because it’s the right thing to do. Do I want to see that scale go down? Yes. Do I like exercising on a daily basis only to see the scale stall? No. I do want the outcome. I want to tell you that in two weeks I will have lost 100 pounds by eating healthy and exercising. I’m not sure of the when though and I've got to be okay with that. That cannot be the reason why I do what I do. That cannot drive me. If it does drive me, then no wonder I’ve gotten off the beaten path one too many times. I understand that I have to be open to see the positive even when I feel completely negative. I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m not saying that you won’t have to dig deep to find something positive but guess what, I have to pull the seat closer to the steering wheel when I drive, I picked grilled chicken over pizza a week ago, and this weekend I took a picture where I don’t have a gut. This does not mean it’s not discouraging to see the scale stall. For crying out loud I’m 2 pounds away from being under two hundred pounds. Why am I doing this? Why is this so important? So often we lose sight of our why. Or our why becomes something that it shouldn’t be. I want to do what’s right because I desire to do what’s right not because of a number or a size. I want to walk and eat healthy because it’s the right thing to do. I’m sure that most of you do but if there’s just one of you out there who isn’t then let’s change that. Stop looking for a number to bring you joy. Some looking at a size of clothing keep you on the straight and narrow. Pants go out of style and when they do where is your mindset? Please let me say that this is a learning process for me. I’m not saying that my mind thinks this way all the time. However, I’m just hoping that soon all of this will sink in and when it doesn’t I’ll have someone like you to remind me of this post. The second thing I’m learning is that you can never be too prepared. Too prepared for what you may ask?? ANYTHING! Are you going to a birthday party with cake? Be prepared. Are you depressed and feel like you can binge on anything with carbs, be PREPARED. Are you going out to dinner to a restaurant that you’ve never been to? Prepare!! I say this because I struggle with this. I recently went to a restaurant with family that was a southern cooking delight. If it can be fried, they served it and they served it well. I’m not even going to be cruel by telling you all the delightful sides that they had but let’s just say they would make Paula Dean scream BUTTER YALL! If I had known before I walked in there that I was walking into such deliciousness, I’d probably stayed at home. Does that make me sound snotty?? I’m okay with that. Thankfully I prayed before walking in and even though I was bitter, I ate my grilled piece of chicken and stewed in my bitterness for 20 minutes as everyone else ate their country fried country goodness. If you are going somewhere that you know you’re going to be tempted to eat something that is garbage, then either don’t go or bring your own less horrible garbage. If you go to a birthday party with cake, chances are if you don’t come prepared, you will have your cake and eat it too. Seriously, you might feel lame bringing in outside food. I get that! I feel lame. . But seriously carbs kill. Can I get that on a shirt? Or maybe Carbs don’t make friends and REAL friends don’t make carbs. I can’t keep crackers in my house. I can’t keep popcorn in my house. I’ll be honest with you. I buy goldfish for my son’s lunch but I make sure that they are prepackaged so that I don’t have to touch them or look at them. Have mercy on that little fish’s soul if he brings home any strays in his lunch box! I know I sound crazy. What kind of lunatic would eat leftover lunch from a preschool lunch box. THIS LUNATIC!!! I have to make sure I buy prepackaged stuff or I just can’t let it in the house. If I know I’m in a crazy way about food, then I dial a friend. I have one friend that I go to when I feel crazy about food. Am I mad? Am I depressed? Am I having my monthly time?? It doesn’t matter the reason, just have your friend that you can tell if you are feeling crazy. Whatever your addiction, this time will come and you need to make sure that you’ve got someone who help you come out of crazy town. Make sure your friend will help you clean up your mess and not just talk about it. Just get prepared ya'll. Life won't do it for you! So while I’m not below two hundred, THANK YOU TWO POUNDS, I’m better off than I was yesterday. I can’t say that I’ve lost 100 but I can say I’ve lost 92 and I’m okay with that too. I’m not giving up and you don’t give up either. The struggle is real and sometimes it’s big and sometimes it’s REAL BIG but it seems a heck of a lot easier when you’re not going through it alone.
  25. 10 likes
    I love this post. I have a real fear of pizza and cake. I'm not saying that I'm never going to have them again but right now that's what I'm saying and I'm okay with that. My addiction is going to be different from other addictions. I can have halo top icecream and it doesn't make me want to lose control but I can have m&m's and I want to snort, inhale, and figure out how to inject them in blood stream. My relationship with food was seriously perverted and on some levels it still is but I'm working on it. Food really did soothe me emotionally. I didn't realize how much until I didn't have it to do so. The one thing that really brought me comfort was also killing me. So now I have to figure out healthy ways to bring comfort. Thanks for posting this. It was great!
  26. 10 likes
    So much wisdom here from @Res Ipsa and @Stephtay, thank you both. I am so glad I have my honeymoon period to change all of my habits. I'm working hard at it, and being able to do that without dealing with physical hunger is so great. It's like I suddenly have 25% of my brain freed up from thinking about food: shopping, preparing, serving, eating, planning a new diet, planning a decadent treat, feeling guilty about said treat, planning another diet, etc, etc, etc. Not to mention the constantly running undercurrent of unhappiness about my weight. 10 hours a week? Counting all the negative thinking, I'd probably double that! New relationship to food, yes please.
  27. 10 likes
    @Trish1967 How's this for a smile?
  28. 10 likes
    Hello! We just got home tonight and I'm trying to stay awake to beat jet lag and do laundry had an amazing vacation; just so special. Here is a favorite pic of mine from our trip. Taken at the port of Tel Aviv. LOFT cropped jeans (size 4) and small LOFT patchwork blouse. Another favorite, but not so much for what I'm wearing . With some amazing Israeli soldiers in the Old City of Jerusalem. Citizens of Humanity pink cuffed jeans (size 27) and small white LOFT tee.
  29. 10 likes
    Before WLS I would snorkel whenever I had the chance. My honeymoon was a tropical trip so my husband and I could snorkel! I am a life long water person. Learned to swim before I could walk. Was my father's first mate in many sailboat races before I was 10. Went on to teach sailing in my early 20's. I was always interested in scuba, but scared to try. I finally got up the nerve to try when I was approx 300 pounds. The dive master couldn't get me weighted right and I kept flipping on my back like a turtle due to all my belly weight. Then, she tried to drag me under. It was about as awful as it sounds. After I'd made the decision to have WLS, I made a long list of all the things I wanted to do after I lost weight: ride roller coasters, run a mile, get out of plus sizes, etc. On that list I added learn to scuba dive. For me, diving was a lofty goal. Between JAWS, my first attempt at scuba and a healthy respect for how quickly things can go wrong in water, I had a lot to overcome. I got certified last Fall and took my 2nd diving trip last week. What helped me to push through my fears about surgery and stick to the plan to lose weight (and try to stick to it to keep it off) was/is WLS was my one chance to hit the re-set button on my life. I often said "no" to activities and invites when I was 250+. I would still go to the beach, snorkel, ski and many other things. But I declined to stand up with friends at their weddings. I didn't give scuba a second try. I skipped a tropical "girls' weekend" because they were all thin and would be wearing cute sundresses. I would have been the fat one sweating buckets in my black tunic and leggings. It's been 3.5 years since my WLS. I keep it top of mind everyday so I don't over eat or over drink. But, it is hard to remember how tough life was at 300 pounds. On this diving trip I jumped off the boat and climbed back on with 40+ pounds of scuba gear several times a day. It was a piece of cake compared to how hard it was to climb back on a boat when my body was 300 pounds and I had no gear! Sharing all of this with the hope to inspire someone who might be on the fence about WLS or is post-op and having a rough moment. I also learned to love color post-op. That's me in the pink and blue wetsuit. I wore all black everyday for so long the goth kids were telling me to take a break. No more all black for me anymore.
  30. 10 likes
    I love that I have a neck, and a jawline. I haven't had a jawline in years. Who knew there was still a neck in there? My collars were tight and now they are too big. Every time I dress in the morning I dance about and stick my neck out to look in the mirror and tap on my cheekbones, that actually stick out a little bit beyond my (sunken, normal) cheeks. Then I look at my arms and legs in which you can see A MUSCLE or two and some contour. I have become a strutting chicken with scrawny legs. It's grand.
  31. 10 likes
    Yep, ditto what she said. This is actually the perfect time to change the way you view food because you're not excited about it. When was the last time you weren't excited about food? Maybe after a nasty bout of stomach flu lol. So, take this time to relearn what food is for...fuel. Develop the healthy habit of eating what and when you should. Believe me, the vast majority come to the end of the honeymoon period with head hunger rearing it's ugly head. The only way to beat it is to have developed healthier eating habits, and healthier coping mechanisms. Besides, you need fuel to keep up with that active toddler
  32. 10 likes
    This is not a comment on the OP or her spouse. This topic got me thinking about posts I've seen over the years so I want to share my POV. In general, for anyone considering WLS, I think it might be helpful to know there are lots of reasons spouses aren't supportive of WLS. I've been on this site for over 4 years and I've seen people share all kinds of reasons their spouse/partner isn't supportive of WLS. Here are a few: Concern their spouse will die. Tired of riding the weight loss/gain cycle with their spouse and thinking this won't be any different. Not wanting to address their own weight/food or addiction issues. Being sexually attracted to their heavy spouse and fearing they won't desire their spouse in a thinner body. Liking that their spouse doesn't have a lot of self esteem or isn't very active/happy. Fear that their spouse will "get hot and leave them for someone else". I'm sure there are loads of other reasons why spouses either aren't initially supportive or supportive at all. No matter where your spouse/partner stands on your decision, I encourage every one to do what is right for them. Keep the lines of communication open and know their partner is probably scared of the unknown. Not many people really love change, especially if it is a change that is not of their choosing.
  33. 10 likes
    Hope all the Mom's had a Happy Mother's Day. This is me with my guys. I'm wearing a size 6 dress from Loft.
  34. 10 likes
    Thanks for all of your thoughts, folks! Turns out no one noticed that I wasn't eating much. People were having so much fun at the wedding and their eyes were on the happy couple. I went to the bar and asked for water with limes in a cocktail glass. This way, I looked right at home at the open bar. My husband doesn't drink, so it didn't look strange when we turned down the champagne for the toast. I did notice something new about myself. I accidentally had a gulp of Sprite and it was the most disgusting thing I have tasted since the gross jello at the hospital! I used to love Sprite. The thick, sugary syrup was overwhelming. I'm not sad about this discovery. Thanks again!
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    July 16, 2013 I walked in the hospital weighing a frightening 329 lbs. Walking was a hard thing to do then. I panted and panted and panted everywhere I went. Too much darn fat on me. July 27, 2016 Here I am weighing 144 lbs less and feeling oh so wonderful. Weight loss gave me a new attitude. I love me now!!!!!
  37. 10 likes
    Hard to see but I'm wearing a black top with sheer ruffle on the bottom, sz xs, black shrug sz s and pants sz 6.
  38. 9 likes
    I have 2. Put in our large garden. It used to take me all day as I had to sit after each row. Now it just takes a couple of hours after hubby get the ground ready. I used an old white plastic chair while waiting for hubby to get it ready... we were at Menards today to get a rototiller and looked at some folding directors chairs. Got them to check out and saw the max weight was 225. Didn't even think to look at the weight limits..
  39. 9 likes
    I walked 22,000 steps today, according to my Fitbit. That's more than 9 miles! This is my highest step count, but I've been regularly getting 5-7 miles. It feels so great! (well, I'm a bit tired at the moment...). I'm at the beach, so I've got a beautiful place to walk This time last year, I was actively avoiding going for walks because it felt uncomfortable. I'm so thankful for this change!
  40. 9 likes
    So small backstory on Kimberly. Years and years ago, I went to school, and I got a degree in anthropology. Then along came my son, and two more children, and a cross country move, and for 13 years I was a stay at home mom. It's incredibly hard to find a job when your work experience is from a decade prior. So, I have this major thing I am doing, surgery, and I am making the appointments, and running around doing the leg work, and my husband jokes that once our youngest goes into school I can get a job, so I figured why not and I applied. Well, I ended up getting hired, which I actually really love my job, I get paid 12.50$ an hour to stand around and talk with people. However, my start date was August 1st, and if you look to the left my surgery was August 1st. So, I had to explain to them that I couldn't start on the 1st, I'd have to start later. So I officially went to work August 19th. Three weeks after my surgery. So, when I came to work I had weight restrictions in what I could lift, and I work in electronics (which is perfect for me as I build computers, and I am a huge gamer, and I work as an IT system admin for an online store), which require a lot of lifting. So I was really open with my co-workers, and explained that I had this surgery, and a restriction, etc.. ALL of my co-workers have been really supportive. When I first came to work, they would ask me how it's going, how much I've lost, and understanding of why I couldn't eat certain foods. I have had three co-workers that have had the surgery done, two have succeeded, one had failed (she is the one that keeps telling me how I could cheat on my diet, I told her I didn't do this drastic thing to my body to cheat, but thank you for offering - though more tactful), and one who's husband had the surgery done and lost 200+lbs and has maintained for a decade, and a handful of people interested, so I've sent them my surgeons office card. I posted this post, the pictures, to facebook, and here were the responses : Dorothy is my direct manager. I've had nothing but love, and acceptance from my co-workers, and it's been fantastic, everyone has been supportive, and excited for me. One of the girls I work with was very excited about when I switched my vest from a 2xl to a medium, for a while when I was dropping sizes I'd come in and be asked what size I am now, and high-fived on it. I've actually never been in an atmosphere where all of the women I work with have been truly supportive. One of store managers, whom everyone is afraid of, made a comment to people that I am "doing it right", by not cheating, and moving around, that she's had friends that have failed at it, but since I've changed my diet, it was the way to go. Regardless, I am very very open about my surgery, and about why I had it done. I cannot fathom not being able to talk about it, it was a major life event, and I have had no one be rude to me. I've even had customers ask me about it, I had one lady who had the same surgery done by the same surgeon, she's failed and put on weight, but she was excited to talk with me about it also (Course she had hers done 20+ years ago). I realise that the stigma is from people to say "Oh you've cheated" by doing the surgery, but I really have had no one say that to me, all of my responses and talk has been very positive, and I hover the middle road, by being able to talk with my overweight co-workers, and my thin co-workers and understand where both are coming from, it's great to be able to listen to people's stories.
  41. 9 likes
    Upon returning to my our car following a group dinner, my husband realized that the person next to us parked way too close on the driver's side for anyone to get in to the door.....anyone except me! He said you're going to have to get in there and back the car out for us. LOL!
  42. 9 likes
    Super casual outside wedding on Sunday. Michael Kors XS pink and black dress and black patent leather sandals. Sorry for the hotel potty in the back lol.
  43. 9 likes
    Truthfully, I went through a spell where I dearly wanted to wear my clothes inside out so everyone could see the label stating a 4 or 6.
  44. 9 likes
    I, for one, am glad you brought this up. I went for my three month follow up yesterday and one of the first things my surgeon asked me was how I was doing mentally. I told him I'd had a few moments of rocking myself in a corner, that my crazy had taken on a whole new level, and he said: "That's pretty much expected. A lot of people who get weight loss surgery have used food as their primary coping mechanism and when that's taken away we see issues they'd previously kept buried bubbling to the surface." He then asked me about how my husband and friends were doing with it and if I had any outside support. I told him that people who did not have a weight issue were the most genuinely supportive and that some people were rather hostile and/or aggressive in their questions. I said my husband was doing better with everything, and that I was a bit surprised at the vigor with which my family kept pushing food, particularly my mom. "We see that a lot, too. Our patients families and friends feel threatened and try to undermine our patients' weight loss. It's really important to get time face to face with someone who doesn't have a personal stake in your recovery for support." I told him I both wanted and despised the attention I'm getting. We laughed when I said that I wouldn't have been physically attracted to me at my previous weight, so why would I expect other people to be. I was prepared as well as I could be for issues coming up, but it's like trying to prepare yourself for a move, a job change, or a death - you can think your way through all of it but your feelings are your feelings, and you can't prepare for those beforehand. I have struggled with the thought "I can't eat __________." also, and had to change it to "I don't eat _______ because ________." Sometimes I still feel like I lost my best friend, and thinking someone outside of me is saying I can't eat certain things makes it worse. It's just semantics, but it has made a difference in how I view my eating. I do get your frustration at the station, however. Yesterday, I was trying to grab lunch prior to my follow up and could not find anything appropriate to eat IN THE HOSPITAL CAFETERIA WHERE MY F-ING SURGERY WAS PERFORMED! lol I feel your pain. I fear I will always carry a lunch pail and sometimes I just don't want to. I suppose it is a small price to pay to be alive and healthier than I have been in 30 years. You have been at this longer than me and your numbers show that it is working. I commend you for putting it out there. Go YOU!
  45. 9 likes
    Tough love. You have to transition. DONT BECOME THE DREAM WHIP LADY!!!! In my surgeons group we have the lady who never transitioned because it was "too hard" and "too uncomfortable". And "no one told her that her stomach would be so tight". She did not have a stricture or anything physiologically wrong, she just didn't want to be uncomfortable. She chose to just eat dream whip because "protein shakes are gross". Needless to say she did not stay at her goal weight. Go figure!! This is a phase. Some people have no appetite years down the road (TMcgee), but it isn't sustainable long term to think you will never eat solid food again. Put on your big girl panties, make a schedule and eat food. This is just a little tiny baby blip in the big picture of the rest of your life.
  46. 9 likes
    Size 14 Bandolino capris! This size is blowing me away. 3X cardigan from Dressbarn.
  47. 9 likes
    1X skirt on clearance for $7 and a 2X garage sale Jean jacket. Very comfy today.
  48. 9 likes
    A naughty pinniped. Birds. A lighthouse (where I would live if I could). Sasquatch returning home to his oceanfront estate after a long day of beach combing?
  49. 9 likes
    It has been a while since i posted. There are days when I will wander the forums, but haven't felt the need to share. But today... I am feeling the need to celebrate my 6 years post surgery! This has been a long and winding road. There have been dramatic ups and crushing downs. Most recently, I put on about 10lbs when my grandmother died. I am an emotional eater, always have been, but it was twice as hard having to travel to be with my mother and having a limited amount of choices when it came to food. I really watched myself when I got home and have taken off 8 of the 10 I gained. One of the ups... A few months ago, I decided to try a few new things. I ended up making a few friends none of which believed me about being overweight until I showed them a photo. It was an ego boost My struggle with being an over eater, emotional eater and all around food lover have NEVER gone away. Here I sit, 6 years post-op and I can honestly say that my continued success boils down to the choices I make each and every day. I have been so fortunate to have a supportive husband. He is always there when I need to vent, willing to make special stops when we are out so that I can eat something more tailored to my needs regardless of what the rest of the group is having and has never made me feel anything but loved then at 245lbs and now at my 140. The fat woman I used to be is, unfortunately, still alive and well in the corners of my mind and she has plenty to say when I have to squeeze into a middle seat, ride an airplane, and EVERY single time I meet someone new. I am learning to ignore that inner voice. Who knows maybe she'll go away over the next 6 years. I wish you all success or continued success.
  50. 9 likes
    As a guy, I refused for many years to even consider having a gastric bypass. I did not want to give up food. I did not want to admit that I really was that fat. I worried that (like every other diet) the surgery would not work. I worried about being out of work after surgery. Mostly I just wanted to ignore my serious weight problem and bury my pain in high calorie foods (washed down with Diet Pepsi). Then a (female) person in my office had a gastric bypass and I saw how she lost her excess weight and how she could still eat (after the initial few months) most real foods, just in smaller and more healthy amounts. Most of all, I saw how very happy she was to be lighter and more healthy. I asked her lots of questions and then (about six months after her surgery) I decided to have the same surgery as her with the same surgeon. About five months later I had the actual surgery. I had the surgery mostly because I wanted to spend the decades going forward with my family and because I was tired of being over weight. I did not want to die an early death due to my high weight. I was tired of wondering if I would fit into an sirplane seat. I was tired of worrying that a chair might collapse under me. I was tired of not being able to buy normal clothes. I was tired of avoiding having my picture taken. I was tired of random people that I would meet making negative comments about my weight. I was tired of sweating all the time. And, I was tired of being judged by people as being fat when they first met me. I have never regretted having my gastric bypass, as it allowed me to become thin and healthy. It has allowed me to become active and feel so much more alive. OK - so now to answer your question. In general, guys really hate to be pressured to do something (especially by a woman) as this questions our judgment, our virility and our self worth. The more that you push him, the less likely that he will agree to it So the best way to get a guy to have the surgery is show him by example. When he sees you losing weight and being happy about it, when he sees you fitting into smaller clothing, when he sees you get a "new relationship with food" in which food is not used as a form of comfort or escape, when he sees you eat out and not be unhappy about it, and when he sees you love your body more, that is when he should want to have the surgery. Try not to pressure him to have surgery. Let him think that it is his idea. Best of luck with your upcoming surgery.