Greetings!
First off, I'm very happy to have found this forum. Back 4 years ago (as of Monday, actually!), the only forums I found revolved mainly around pre-op issues or "preachy" dietary stuff. So I shied away from the online GB community for a long time. This past weekend, I was looking for some information and came across this forum. And I'm so glad!
Here's a little bit about me, by way of introduction...
My name is Jenn, and I live in McAllen, TX (waaay down on the border). I've been heavy all my life -- big Italians on one side, big Welsh/German on the other, lol -- but I never felt happy with myself, mainly because of the emotional abuse I suffered from my mother and classmates. My father and husband always loved me for
me, and my beloved Dad gave me a bittersweet inheritance when he passed in '05, in the form of a life insurance settlement that allowed me to pursue better health and self-image by getting the surgery.
My pre-surg issues were mainly confined to severe GERD and joint pain -- which *every* doc firmly stated that "No, it's not hereditary, 'JUST' lose 100+ lbs and you'll be fine!" At my pre-surg weigh-in, I was 367, despite forgoing any sugary beverages for over a year prior, and 2 weeks of mostly liquid-only fasting for testing purposes. I was probably in the 380s at my biggest.
Surgery went great, I had a laproscopic RNY GB on June 22, 2005, by Dr. Luis Reyes of McAllen. I had it at Mission Regional Medical Center, even though he doesn't normally do rounds there -- it's a smaller hospital in the town where I work, so I felt I had more personal care. No surgical complications, normal post-op pain, and I was out on the morning of the 3rd day. One week post-op, hubby and I went on a mini-vacation, which was awesome, except for two things ... (1) I tore an abdominal muscle getting my still-healing butt out of the spa tub at the B&B (OUCH!), and (2) Fredericksburg, TX, is *very* meat and German food intensive, so on my liquid diet, I could only get *potato soup* for 2 days!
At my 2-week appointment, considering the starchy-liquid diet and my inability to move from the torn muscle, I thought that having dropped 29.5 pounds was great! Heck, for the past 20 years, dropping *1* pound was great! But Dr. Reyes (who is a fantastic surgeon but not much of a bedside manner) said, "Only 29 pounds? Very disappointing. You need to do more." And walked out. Yes, I'm overly sensitive, depressive, whatever... But I never went back. Not for another follow up, or for group sessions.
I thought I could do it on my own. And during that first "honeymoon" year, I did. I hit the "century" mark in the winter of '06 ... but didn't do so well after that year. My lowest weight was in the fall of '07, and I plateaued after that.
Remember my chronic joint pain, the one that was supposed to "vanish" like magic with weight loss? It's gotten progressively worse, as I get older (as hereditary arthritis, *plus* congenital hip dysplasia, *plus* myoclonus tend to do). I react poorly to the weaker pain meds, and I'm terrified of the heavy stuff. My typical "I can't take it anymore" anesthesia is alcohol. Some people might not "approve," but I guess I'd rather be mildly hooked on something I can forego during the day to stay clean for work, than escalate on the opiates the way some of my friends have, till they lost everything.
So why am I here? I'm trying to get back on track in terms of my nutrition ... fatigue, plus bad nutrition, plus booze don't make for a very healthy person. I'm getting back to my protein shakes and cutting out carbs (except for the vodka w/ Diet Coke, lol). I need a little bit of support, and like I said, the people here seem friendly, helpful, and supportive without all the extra guilt-tripping and diet-evangelizing.
I'm just me (hence the username), and while I may not be able to change some things in my life, I can certainly take control of my nutrition again, treat my "tool" right, and be a bit healthier, and happier with what I've got.
(That's probably the most I'll ever say about myself, too ... I'm a pretty quiet person, when I don't have 4 years of pent up stuff in me, lol!)
Thanks for listening ... Glad to have found you!
Saying Hello & My "loong" Intro
Didn't gain, but it's discouraging.
Hopefully, I won't be facing the wrong way, haha
) and Saturday night (burger nite, half patty, no bun), but only because I'm really just not that into food right now. I'm actually CRAVING my protein shakes! I guess my body was *so* deficient that it took time to actually even recognize the nutrients it needs.
Linear Mode
