Hawaiianese Girl

Aloha,
I am 5 weeks out from laparoscopic R/Y surgery and my partner, Danita, is 6 weeks out. We are both extremely miserable. Through all our research on this surgery, no one let us know that there was going to be such depression afterwards. We can't eat anything we used to eat, no comfort food, no "normal" food....life just sucks right now. It's uncomfortable to eat, it's scary to eat, and we have to analyze everything we're about to put in our mouths. We never knew things were gonna be this difficult. Right about now we're asking ourselves, "what in the hell were we thinking?"

As if the normal aches and pains post surgery weren't enough, my left leg has been numb since the second I woke up from surgery. So, for 5 weeks my leg has been numb, but there is pain deep inside as well, AND when my clothing touches it, it feels like my skin is on fire. It's driving me nuts and I'm very worried. I spoke with my surgeon about it during my 3-week visit and he said to wait for my 6-week visit and see how it's going. I couldn't wait that long so I spoke to one of his nurses and she said that during surgery, they put a bofi (sp?) on my leg, which powers electricity to their coterizing tools and it just so happens that the exact part of my leg that is all jacked up, is the same spot they laid that "thing". She said that it can take 18 months for my leg to come back to normal - not what I wanted to hear. Anybody have this problem?

For the past 7 days I've been in almost excruciating pain in my left side. I'm guessing that maybe scar tissue has begun to form and now every time I move it's ripping away...I don't know what else it could be but it's as if I'm right back to square one. I was prescribed litacaine patches and they kind of help, but the pain is really deep so the patches only put a dent in the pain. Thank God for the refill of liquid Lortab but I can only take that at night time since I have to sit at work during the day time. It sucks though because I'm sitting in pain for 8 hours.

Anyway, Danita is doing much better than me and I'm wondering if it's because she's a week ahead of me. However, we are both very depressed and feel like we're living in pure hell and want to go back to the way we used to be. It's so difficult to see people on TV or anywhere, eating normally. We'd give anything to be able to eat normally again. This just really sucks and I really need somebody to tell me that this gets better. Danita has already lost 32 lbs in 6 weeks and I've lost 23 lbs in 5 weeks, however, I gained 2 lbs back as of today and she gained 1 lb back. Is this normal? How is that even possible when we're barely able to eat anything? God, with all the pain and B.S. I'm going through I don't need to be gaining my weight back already. I need to know that all this is FOR something...yanno? I need to see some results before I really go into a deep depression that I can't get out of. Any advice would be most helpful. Thanks for reading...

Miserably Yours,
Hawaiianese

Squishy

Oh my... where do I start? OK...first, you have to remember that you are only 5 weeks out from your surgery. How you eat now will change dramatically as time goes on. The pouch is probably still swollen so it will loosen up a little.

The depression can be from several things. Some people have hormonal changes following the surgery that can really cause you some tough times. Our nurses told us that it was not uncommon to "have an emotional melt-down" several weeks after surgery. Also, I think we all go through a period where we mourn the loss of comfort foods. We've been soothing ourselves with food our whole lives and suddenly we can't do that anymore. The depression is pretty normal and should pass in time. It gets a LOT easier.

I don't know anything about the bofi thingy. Sounds like a grounding point for the cauterizing machine. I'm sure the numbness will pass in time. Not sure about the pain in your side. Are you walking frequently? The more you move the faster the incisions see to heal. Also have to make sure that you are getting enough protein. Your body needs the protein to heal. If you are concerned about the pain though, be sure to talk to your surgeon or his staff right away.

Danita is probably doing better because of having another week of healing, but also... everyone is different. You really can't compare one person's recovery to another.

Finally, it is very normal to gain a pound here and there. The way our nurse explains it is that your body does not know the difference between having surgery and being mauled by a bear. All it knows is that there has been a significant trauma so it tries to protect itself by retaining fluids and slowing down your metabolism. If you are following the required diet, don't worry, you will keep losing. Make sure you are drinking enough water because if you don't your body will try to hold onto even more.

I hope that helps!!
I'm glad you found the forum!
-Mike-

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TT Squishybear

"If you are going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchill

05/30/07 Open RNY
430/346/240.5/225?
Highest/Surgery Date/Current/Goal
6' 2"

TT Gym Rat Club Member #65

Hawaiianese Girl

Hey there Squishy (cute name),

Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. I'll have Danita read your post as soon as she gets home from work.

We never thought it would be this difficult to not be able to eat our favorite foods. People who aren't addicted to food don't understand what it means to not be able to have what they want. I depended on my favorite comfort foods for so many reasons and now I can't have them. It's incredibly difficult to deal with. Danita and I aren't sure how we're going to get around or through this, but hopefully we'll figure it out soon. We watched "Big Medicine" on TLC all the time, where they show patients getting this surgery and not one time have we ever seen anyone go through what we're going through. It kind of stinks that they don't ever show what REALLY goes on in a patient's life. They didn't show how you have to analyze everything you're about to put in your mouth. They didn't show how awful dumping is and they didn't show how scary it is to sit and wait to see how a certain food may or may not affect you. This whole thing is just so damn complicated.
We just want to get to that place where other people are at who have 6 months or a year under their belt. You know, the people who "look fabulous and are feeling great!!!"

As far as the pain in my left side goes...I'm not sure what brought it on. We haven't started exercising yet but we've both gone back to work. I went back to work at week 3 and I basically sit at my desk and walk back and forth to the printer. I've been trying to stay still since I'm still trying to "recover" from the surgery and still have some pain but I was feeling pretty good for about a week. Then all of a sudden, 7 days ago I started feeling excruciating pain in my left side, every time I moved. It's like I'm back-sliding and it feels like it did when I first came home from the hospital. I just hope there's no complications or anything and that it's just scar tissue or something. Danita said that this very same thing happened to her at 3 weeks out and as fast as the pain came back, it left just as fast. So, keep your fingers crossed for me.
Also, congrats on all of your weight loss. You look great!
Thanks,
Hawaiian

Zenomia

__________________
Zen
LAP RNY June 5th, 2006, Genesis Medical Center, Iowa
257 / 125 / 139
Start / Lowest / Goal
Plastics 8/7/07 - Dr. Aric Eckhardt
AKA: ZenBear

If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning!!

Godsblessedme

almost sounds like a deep vein thrombosis. (blood clot) especially the on fire part. I would take nothing less than the doctor examining it propmtly.

I'm sorry your having such a rough time with this dear. Everyone is so different and try not to compare your surgery to your partners surgery because we all tolerate things and bodies act so differently. I hope things ease up soon. Blessings...

__________________

Deborah (before sugery)

PreOp/Current/Goal
268 /212 (5/12/08) /130

Surgery Date: 12/18/07 Lap RNY

Gym Rat #98

Hawaiianese Girl

Zen, thank you so much for your support and well-wishes and for your compliment...I appreciate it. I'll have Danita read your post.

"Blessed", I've heard of that deep vein thrombosis thing and I pray that's not what it is. Thanks so much for your advice and kind words...I'll pass everything on to Danita as well.

Does anyone know why popcorn isn't allowed until 6 months out and does anyone know if peanuts are allowed now?

Thanks,
Hawaiian

Native2u

Hello & welcome to TT.

I haven't had surgery yet. I'm still in the "waiting for approval" stage.

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Valerie

Still looking for the real me & I know that I'm in there somewhere! I'm going to find her soon.

GYM RAT #106

Lap-RNY
4/23/08 ~Waiting for Insurance Approval
5/09/08 ~ Denied!!!! WTF!

caran

Hi Hawaiian and welcome to TT!

I am worried about your leg and would get it looked at ASAP. It does sound like DVT! I am sorry you are having to go through this. Everyone is SO different so try not to compare yourself to your partner.

I am only 2 weeks out and didnt hear that we were not supposed to eat popcorn! I took my son to a movie yesterday and ate some of his popcorn- just to try to see if I could. I could- no problem- until about 1 1/2 hr later! We were driving home and I had to find the nearest bathroom QUICKLY!! I wasnt sick to my stomach, if you know what I mean. It went through me that quickly. I wasnt in any pain, but I wont be rushing to try any more of his popcorn in the near future!!!

As far as the 'comfort foods' go- you have to find something else you can rely on when you are stressed etc. Something that is not food related. Do you guys have a support group in your area? if so maybe attend some meetings.

Good luck and I hope all this passes so you can enjoy your new body!

Caran

fisher1000

Aloha back atcha!

I saw your post in the car thread and thought I would check this one out too. Welcome to the forum, and I'm sorry you're having problems.

The eating issues are most likely temporary, and normalcy will return as time goes on. As for the leg--I'd go right back to the doctor, surely this isn't standard procedure--I've never heard of this complication before. 18 months of surgeon induced pain sounds about equal to two million in malpractice payouts...what do you think?

I know it's difficult early out, but try to concentrate on the four main things: Protein, Vitamins, Fluids, and Exercise. A lot of times, those of us that have gone through the surgery hit these depression stages, and you will most likely hit a couple more as time goes on...but they are temporary and the joy of becoming more and more healthy will start to take over more and more often.

Please check in again with the doc and then with us to let us know what he says...you can't spend the next 18 months on LorTab. (Well, you could, but you'll slowly become as wacky as Paula Abdul!)

You've found an awesome resource of support here--it's a great place to come for love and support! Get Danita's butt on here too!

-Mike

__________________
FISHERBEAR MIKE
402/249/under 200 (As of 05/10/08)
Highest/Current/Goal
Open RNY - September 24th
153 pounds GONE, BABY, GONE!

BMI: 63 (was) / 38.8 (is)

Tonystark04

Hey ma, sorry to hear about your issues... I havent had my surgery yet but next week is my final appt and then 2 more classes for the weight management, then hopefully I'm off to get approval from my insurance. This site is great in looking for answers to most of your questions. About your leg issue, I will head right back to the surgeon office to get that checked out. After I had my gallbladder surgery I caught Pneumonia ....I informed the surgeon that I was getting pain in my rib area he simply thought it was soreness from laying in bed, and it took me to have a 102 degree fever to head back in the ER to get treated...But welcome to the site...also check out some of the recipes they have listed.