Need some advice and support from England - ThinnerTimes

amber d · 09-07-2007, 06:50 AM

Hi everybody,
I just wanted to get some honest advice from you guys. I saw my surgeon about 10 weeks ago and he agreed to do a gastric bypass.
I then got cold feet and went away and tried some slimming tablets (Riminobant) for about 5 weeks. I lost about 4 pounds which I think is really poor but the tablets made me feel really depressed and slightly suicidal. I stopped taking them and within a couple of days I felt much more posative.
I know now that I am not going to lose this weight without surgery and that I have to make up my mind whether I want to continue gaining weight and feeling ashamed of myself or finding the courage to go ahead with the surgery and get my life back on track.
I am terrifed that I will be one of those people who regret the surgery due to all the complications. I know it is a small risk but I am such a baby when it comes to pain and discomfort. Does anyone out there think that you need to be a tough cookie to get through WLS or do youthink I would be OK. I have done loads and loads of research and my surgeon is one of the leading ones in Britain so I know I am in good hands. I am just having a hard time coming to a decision, I badly want to have it done so I would love some feedback from anyone who has any advice or tips. Please feel free to tell me the your negative thoughts too. thank you so much for reading this.
Amber x :

Claire-in-Texas · 09-07-2007, 09:35 AM

Hi, and welcome!

I don't think you have to be a tough cookie, no. I think what is necessary is that you take all the info you researched and apply it to you. Weigh (no pun intended) the pros and risks. Only you can determine what is in your best interests.

Mine is a long story, and I won't go into it here, but I will say that after I did all the research and spoke with the surgeon, I was totally convinced that not only would this save my life (lengthen it) but also drastically improve the quality of my life (back pain issues). I am 5 months post op, and I am so very glad I made the decision I did.

All surgeries have the potential for complications, and they happen. So the question is, does your eye go to the pros and how the surgery can affect your life, or does it go to the cons and the fears.

And incidentally, fear can be a good thing - it will stop you from doing something that just doesn't feel right.

Speaking for myself, I wasn't fearless. I believed, though, that this surgery was ultimately in my best interests.

The very best to you, regardless of your decision.

Dayanara · 09-07-2007, 10:11 AM

Do you have people that will support your decision and can be there for you when you are having your ups and downs? I think that is a main factor for me. I don't think I would have the courage I do going into this and would get cold feet easily without the support I have from my friends and family.

I wish you luck!

Squishy · 09-07-2007, 06:54 PM

Are you otherwise healthy? What other means of weight loss have you tried? You've probably gone through all of the same attempts that the rest of us have, but this is not something that you want to jump to if you have not exhausted your other options.

You do not have to be some kind of superwoman to be able to handle this.

You just have to go into it with your eyes wide open and ready to use the tool to help you make some major changes in your life.

Sounds like you have done your homework on the surgeon. That's a great step! Best wishes on your decision!
-Mike-

amber d · 09-09-2007, 06:49 AM

It really does help knowing that people out there willing to help with davice and stuff. thank you all so much.
I have done loads of research about WLS over the past year and this is not something that I have undertaken lightly. It is just that I am scared of being in pain and nauseated all the time and that I will regret the surgery. But on the other hand, I think of myself slim and healthy with a zest for life.
During the day I am really positive about it but then I am waking up in the night with a terrible feeling of dread.
I dont know if this is a normal thing to do before a big operation or what. I just dont want to make a mistake that I may regret for the rest of my life. I know that things will be difficult in the early weeks and I can accept this. I am just frightened that I will have problems for ever. I guess I am just a pessimist I supppose. I have a great family who will support me ( but they do think I am not heavy eonough to warrant WLS because I weigh 215 pounds and they think I could lose a few pounds just with dieting) I know that my wieght will continue to rise over time and that I will become even more depressed than I am so in a way I have no choice but to have the surgery. I just hope it is successful. thanks again for reading this. It really helps having this forum
Amber x

kellyinvirginia · 09-09-2007, 09:43 AM

Oh Amber! {{{{hug}}}}} I really know the anxiety you are experiencing right now! They had to wait to start my IV the morning of my surgery because I was gagging out of nervousness!! I was scared to death! I knew in my heart that this was the only way for me to go! I HAD to get healthy for myself and my family. I found out I was diabetic and was put on meds before my WLS and was already on BP meds....neither of which I take now. As far as the pain?? I'm a whimpy kitten, BUT....I did it! It was only really bad for me that first day. They give you plenty of meds to help with that. Once I sucked it up and just started walking like they told me too it all got sooo much better! If I can do it girl, you can too! Nausea? Yep, I get it quite a bit but not to the extreme that some do. Most of the time when I feel that way it is because I am not eating when I should or maybe didn't have a protein drink or haven't had enough water....so it is my own fault most of the time. I had a really bad problem with diarrhea but that too has passed. Even with the things I have dealt with and deal with I have never regretted this. I wish you knew what a baby I am and you would really see what I am trying to say here. Nothing has feels worse than the thought of not being here to watch my babies grow up! (or even worse than the thought of trying to squeeze in the booth when you go out with your family!) Sorry for rambling on here...you can do it!!! Have a good day

andet · 09-09-2007, 02:07 PM

Like the diet pills, we all know those won't work.

Know that you can gain the weight back with this surgery. You will have to eat differently than the way you currently do. At some point and time, you will be able to eat so much that you can gain any weight back that you have lost.
The procedure you are thinking about can leave you with many problems. Mal-absorption means you are starving your body of the nutrients it is supposed to have. You can have serious complications, even if you eat healthy because of the way your digestive system is rerouted.
If there is something in you hestating, it may befor a good reason.

I say try something else and put your mind around the fact that if you don't sti k to healthy eating and exercise you will have to alter the way your body is supposed to be to a completely unnatural state because you cannot control your appetite and refusal to go out and exercise.

I'm not trying to talk you out of the surgery. I just know I had the same hesitation that you are describing and i didn't walk away. I wish I had, so my post comes from having those same feelings.

Other than the initial quick weight loss of this procedure, after that it is slow 1-2 lbs a week. You can achieve that with a good weight loss plan and for less money.

Many people have great results with the surgery, many don't.

Good luck with your decision.

Dannolad · 09-10-2007, 06:17 AM

It is a big step, I know we all get cold feet about things from time to time. Please dont take offence, but you need to clear your thoughts and focus on your goals. I yo-yo dieted for years and took loads of pills, including naughty stuff like T3's and T4's and they did squat apart from making me sweat. You need to talk this over with someone you trust, who is going to listen and help you come to your own decision. There will be minor setbacks, they happen to us all post op. But what will happen if you do not? I was already feeling back and joint pain and starting to slow down. I have a 2 year old son who spurred me along - I did not want to be an embarrassment to him and wanted to be around for the long haul for him.

Do you need to be tough to get through it? No, I dont think so, you need to be committed to it, it is a whole life change, not a quick fix, do I regret it? No, I have not felt this fit or been this size for 10 or more years, at last I feel that I am back in control. I will be six months out in two weeks time.

So chin up mate. These guys on here are worth their weight in gold, someone on here has always been there, seen it or done it and most certainly got the T Shirt (In size small no doubt)