I am Paige, I'm 39 and live in Sacramento CA. I have 4 children ages 19, 20, 21 & 22...... You might want to grab a drink this is going to be a long post.
I found this forum 3 days ago and read for a while before I decided to post. My journey through WLS has been a long one and for the most part been an unpleasant one but I'm staying hopeful that someday it will get better.
So here's the story......
In 1990, I weighed in at 213 pounds on my 5'3" frame that made me MO, plus I had back problems, joint problems, depression issues... on and on ad nauseum.... I had the surgery that was popular back then, open stapling of the stomach to create a smaller pouch and a ring at the bottom to limit flow into the digestive tract. This surgery was great I had absolutely no complications, except learning the limits of my pouch that caused a few sessions of vomitting, was back at work in 3 weeks. I maintained my weight loss of 75 pounds for 12 years and then something changed and I began gaining weight.
The weight gain was slow.. all the sudden I was a size 10 then a year later size 12 then a 16 for about 2 years and then I found myself back up to a size 22 and 218 pounds. I decided that something was wrong and went in for tests. They found I had ruptured the staple line and food was free flowing back and forth between the pouches. I knew I could eat more but never had a pain or problem so didn't realize it was ruptured.
No surgeons in Sacramento would touch me, except the one that my insurance wouldn't pay for...of course. So it was off to Los Angeles to visit Dr. Stanley Klien who was the closest surgeon I could find to fit both what I needed and what the isurance wanted...I talked to the doctor and he said "no problem, this is an easy fix and while I'm in there, lets just do a revision to the RNY, it will work much better for you". I thought okay no problem... I hated the thought of doing another open procedure but I hated being fat more so I started the process.
My first mistake was not asking enough questions, the second was not going through all the steps like a first time paitent.... since I was a "re-do" they didn't make me do all the nutrionist, counseling and jumping through hoops. I missed a ton of information about what my new anatomy would be like and most importantly that "revisions" carry a much much higher rate of complications post-op than original surgery.
With that said... I had my surgery 9/26/06, 7 months ago... and I've been sick every single day since 3 weeks post-op,some times it just in themorning and sometimes it lasts all day. I either feel nauseous, vommit or I'm dealing with low potassium, dehydration, sharp shooting pain and lower ab gas and bleching that is both embarrassing and distressing. No kidding in the morning I take a drink of liquid and I burp for 10 minutes. It actually makes me feel nausea... I have had maybe 10 firm stools in 7 months and I also have this funky light-headed thing that isn't about the dehydration I've been put in the hospital 3 times since the original surgery for dehydration.
I've had all the tests to see if I have a stricture, internal hernia, make sure the bowels are moving. From week 3 to week 17, I was on 5 different meds for nausea, nothing worked and finally had to just stop everything becuase it was making it worse, then an internist here said it was depression so started me on Zoloft & Ativan... that was an 8 week nightmare that I'm just getting over now. I have been Ativan/Zoloft/Ambien free for 12 days.
I went back to LA at least 20 times to see the surgeon and he never really had an answer, just kept saying... it's normal but we'll try this test.
I finally went back to the original surgeon I found here at home and he said I have to understand that it may take up to 1.5 years for me to heal completely and I'm thinking.. "well that would have been important information to know before I had surgery" I'm pissed at Dr. Klien, he's an incredible surgeon I know he did the best job but I feel totally ambushed by the lack of knowledge. He said he will check me in a month but that unless there's somethig concrete wrong besides random nausea and pain, I just have to wait it out.
I also left out that I got terribly addicted to the lortab that they gave me, I took it for 3 weeks and in a downward spiral I ended up in the hospital to medically withdraw from it after taking it for only 3 weeks. That was not a fun game.
So here I am at 7 months I can only eat about 2oz at a time and it takes me all blessed day to get my 64oz of fluid down. I have pain on a daily basis when I eat, I've become almost nurotic about making sure I have food I can eat when I leave the house, if I feel well enough to leave the house. Most of the time I'm shaky and weak which I can handle. I just went back to work, I lost my business over this.
If anyone asked me today if I'd do it again.... No... in fact hell no. I'd rather be fat than what I've been through. Another thing... people are always commenting on my weight and new figure, I've lost 80 pounds, and most of the time I just feel resentful. I think.. "you really don't want my food plan...believe me"
I guess I'm wondering if anyone else has gone through what I've gone through? Does it ever get better? I'm totally worried about losing too much weight...I'm able to get less than 500 calories a day, it's a real concern. Will my hair ever stop falling out of my head? This weekend I had to cut off my formally beautiful long lush blond hair because it's gotten so thin that the length is weighing it down and it looks horrible.
I used to be a morning person, I just want to wake up, have a cup of coffee go to work, eat real food and spend time with my family. I want my life back... and I'm angry that I don't have it.
I guess I should turn the rant off now... I'm not usually a miserable person but I've lost the "fight" in me and being normal again seems hopeless.
There's so many issues (and in doing a spell check noticed a few I forgot to mention...no I won't subject you to more misery
)to address in this single post that I don't really expect anyone to answer but the venting feels good and I thank all of you for listening.
Everyday I pray for strength, understanding and wisdom for myself and the doctors, if you are the praying type, please add me to your list.
Just joining in with the long version of my story.....
Many on here have expereinced similar things. They will have some great advice on how to get in your protein and calories.....because 500 is not good. Stick around and feel free to rant.....and hang in there!
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